Heresy – Page 3 – Michelle Lesley

Welcome to another “potpourri” edition of The Mailbag, where I give short(er) answers to several questions rather than a long answer to one question.

I like to take the opportunity in these potpourri editions to let new readers know about my comments/e-mail/messages policy. I’m not able to respond individually to most e-mails and messages, so here are some helpful hints for getting your questions answered more quickly. Remember, the search bar (at the very bottom of each page) can be a helpful tool!

Or maybe I answered your question already? Check out my article The Mailbag: Top 10 FAQs to see if your question has been answered and to get some helpful resources.

I am wondering, do people who fit the definition of heretic know they are wrong? Are they consciously rejecting the gospel or genuinely confused / misinterpreting it?

Great question! In my experience, false teachers fall into one of two categories:

1. Con artists who know the whole false teaching universe is a sham, but they’ve observed how much money can be made off the grift and want a piece of the pie, so they feign believing and teaching false doctrine in order to scam people out of their money. They’re no different from people who run pyramid schemes or fake land deals to cheat people. Think Elmer Gantry. These folks are a tiny – I mean, microscopic – segment of those we would call false teachers.

2. Nearly all heretics and false teachers would fall into the second category- the deceived deceivers.

But evil men and impostors will proceed from bad to worse, deceiving and being deceived.
2 Timothy 3:13

with gentleness correcting those who are in opposition, if perhaps God may give them repentance leading to the full knowledge of the truth, and they may come to their senses and escape from the snare of the devil, having been held captive by him to do his will.
2 Timothy 2:25-26

They are deceived into believing that what they’re teaching is the truth and that discerning Christians who rebuke them are “legalistic” or “Pharisees” or “putting God in a box” or some such nonsense.

The people you describe as “genuinely confused / misinterpreting it,” are not in the category of “false teacher”. They are in the category of “genuine Christian in need of discipleship,” much like Apollos. He was teaching what, as far as he knew, was the truth of the gospel. When Priscilla and Aquila took him aside and corrected him, he embraced that correction, began teaching the gospel correctly, and was sent out with joy by the church to continue teaching.

Why did you remove Allie Beth Stuckey from your Recommended Bible Teachers, Authors, etc. list?

Please believe me when I say I didn’t want to, and I waited longer to remove her, and extended more grace and benefit of the doubt to her than anyone else I’ve ever removed (which, praise God, has only been a handful of people). But in fairness to others I’ve removed, to avoid being hypocritical, and out of concern for my followers, I had no choice.

I have been listening to Allie’s podcast, Relatable, for about five years now. I have always thought she did a wonderful job of discussing political issues from a biblical worldview, and explaining these issues in a way that puts them on the bottom shelf for people like me who don’t keep up or don’t get it. That was why I initially started listening.

As her show became increasingly theological in nature, a few things occasionally gave me pause, but nothing that couldn’t be quickly overlooked with love for someone who is generally doctrinally sound.

But then there were the interviews with professing Christians who are biblically problematic. I do want to stress that the vast majority of professing Christians Allie interviewed through the end of 2024 (the last time I listened to an episode) were solid and doctrinally sound. I also want to make clear that I think it’s perfectly acceptable for a Christian host of a Christian podcast to interview lost people (who don’t profess to be Christians) when the topic warrants that. And that is par for the course when your primary field is politics. Neither of these are the interviews I’m referring to.

The interviews I’m talking about have been interviews with professing Christians who have ranged from problematic to literal heretic, and who have shared their testimonies or offered commentary on theological issues. Allie has not had them on the show to challenge their unbiblical beliefs, teachings, or actions, but to present them as acceptable teachers and/or brothers and sisters in Christ.

The Robertsons- Allie has interviewed various members of the Robertson family of Duck Dynasty fame. The Robertsons’ church (where Phil and Al are elders), is part of the Church of Christ denomination, which teaches baptismal regeneration. Baptismal regeneration, in a nutshell, is the belief that you must be baptized in order to be saved – that salvation does not take place until you have been baptized. This is a false gospel.

And yet, Allie has platformed Phil, Al, Willie, and Jase Robertson on the show in episode 1145, Jase and Al Give an Update on Phil Robertson’s Tragic Diagnoses, episode 592, Sharing the Gospel with Trump, and episode 1009, Confidently Sharing the Gospel, all of which were largely about evangelism. You don’t invite people on your show who believe and teach a false gospel¹ to get their insights about sharing the gospel.

In April of 2024, Allie interviewed Tara-Leigh Cobble, in The Bible Isn’t About You | Guest: Tara-Leigh Cobble | Ep 993, and despite being provided with information about why Tara-Leigh is biblically problematic…

…recommended her again in this January 2025 Instagram post:

Then there was Is ‘The Chosen’ Biblical? | Guest: Dallas Jenkins | Ep 726. The obvious answer to any doctrinally sound Christian who has watched or researched The Chosen is, “Absolutely not!”. But it seemed as though perhaps Allie was not very familiar with The Chosen, and the interview mostly consisted of softball questions, which had the (unintended, I’m sure) effect of giving Dallas Jenkins not only a pass on the blasphemy he’s responsible for, both on screen and off, but further opportunity to deceptively claim to a large audience that said blasphemies are actually biblical. (Commendably, however, Allie did make very clear that Mormonism is not Christianity, when that issue arose during the interview.)

I have also had readers ask me to address the fact that Candace Cameron Bure has been a guest on Relatable and was featured at Allie’s Share the Arrows conference for Christian women in 2024. Candace is someone who has flown under my radar because she’s not really a teacher, per se, she’s an actress, but she does share and promote a lot of false teachers on Instagram and her podcast (e.g. Gather25, she had Priscilla Shirer co-host the entire eighth season of her podcast, Jennie Allen, the entire sixth season, Bianca Olthoff – season 4, and Tara-Leigh Cobble – season 1), and if she’s being platformed (by Allie or anyone else) as someone to listen to about Christian issues, this is extremely problematic.

But the interview that finally forced me to remove Allie from my recommends was in December of 2024 when she had Lisa Bevere on the show, not only introducing her as “a sister in Christ,” but promoting her new book.

Allie also appeared with Lisa on pro-life org Live Action’s podcast, The Lies Women Face | Exclusives with Lisa Bevere & Allie Beth Stuckey.

And, as far as I know, Allie is still scheduled to appear with Lisa again in June 2025 at Live Action’s Women’s Summit.

Lisa Bevere is a literal heretic. She and her husband John teach New Apostolic Reformation heresy, and are well known speakers and celebrities in the NAR world. This is not hard to find out. It takes only a few minutes and a search engine. You can read more about the Beveres in my article about them.

Allie and I have exchanged a handful of DMs in the past, so I reached out to her twice after the episode posted but didn’t receive a response (which is understandable since I’m sure she probably receives hundreds of messages a day). When she posted about the episode on Facebook, she received well over a hundred comments, all but a few of them reproving her for platforming Lisa.

I continued listening to Relatable, hoping that, even though it wouldn’t be easy, Allie would offer some sort of retraction, warning her listeners away from Lisa and her heretical teaching, but none was forthcoming.

Several weeks ago, I reached out to Allie again, including the link to my article about the Beveres and encouraging her to publicly retract her support of Lisa. This time, Allie graciously and kindly thanked me and said she would read the article. I have reached out to her twice since then to ask her thoughts, but haven’t heard back from her yet. I’m sure she’s just very busy and will get to it when she can.

To date, as far as I know, Allie has not publicly repented for and retracted her promotion of Lisa, and, as you can see above, the episode with Lisa has not been removed from her YouTube channel.

These are the reasons I’ve removed Allie from my list of recommended teachers and authors.²

UPDATE (May 2025): Since the publication of this article just two months ago, I’ve become aware of two additional serious instances of Allie’s lack of discernment:

1. Allie is scheduled to be a featured speaker at Gabe and Rebekah Lyons‘ Thinq Summit conference (formerly Q Conference/Q-ideas). The Lyonses are extremely progressive (liberal) in their theology. They’re egalitarian, affirming of homosexuality and other sexual immorality, and yoke almost exclusively with false teachers. Read more here.

2. Allie recently platformed (see “Additional Resources” below) Michael Knowles, a staunch Catholic, on her show, seemed to treat him as a brother in Christ, and recommended his show and books to her audience. More info on Catholicism here. More details on why platforming Michael was problematic here (full video here), which Allie did not take kindly to.

Readers, I want you to clearly understand some things here, so please read the following information slowly, carefully, and as many times as you have to in order to grasp what I am and am not saying so that you won’t misrepresent me, or Allie, or jump to wrong conclusions.

I am not saying Allie, herself, is a false teacher. That’s not what removing her from my list of recommended teachers means. It simply means I can’t, in good conscience, and in fairness to others, proactively point people to her. For the foreseeable future, I have no reason or any plans to add her to my list of false teachers.

I am not questioning Allie’s salvation. I really feel like that should be obvious. The only reason I’m even saying this is because I know somebody who’s not reading carefully is going to jump to that wrong conclusion.

I am questioning Allie’s discernment, wisdom, and/or research. To whom much is given, much will be required (Luke 12:48). Allie has a large audience. Many of her followers are lost, new Christians, or undiscerning, which makes them especially vulnerable to false teachers. Before Allie platforms someone on her show as a brother or sister in Christ, a trustworthy Christian resource, or someone with expertise in an area of theology or the Christian life, she has a personal responsibility as a Christian to vet that person and make sure s/he is doctrinally sound so she won’t be thrusting vulnerable people into the arms of a wolf, or even someone who’s just theologically mistaken. Allie has failed to do this several times, which is the crux of the reason I’m pausing recommending her. If you choose to continue following Allie, I would strongly recommend that you vet anyone she interviews, platforms at her own events, or appears with at other events before you decide to follow or receive teaching from that person.

There’s nothing personal or emotional about this decision. I still love Allie to death and consider her a sister in Christ. I’m not mad or upset with her, and I hope that feeling is mutual. Although I’m somewhat disappointed that she hasn’t issued any sort of public retraction or statement of repentance – because that would be the biblical thing to do, and she has thus far failed to do it – removing her from the list of recommended teachers was a policy and ministry decision I was forced to make, not a personal one.

Everybody errs. I do. You do. This time, Allie did. We need to remember the grace Christ has extended to us while still exhibiting repentance when we sin, and expecting brothers and sisters in Christ to do the same. And we certainly need to remember the Golden Rule – to treat others the way we would want to be treated.

This doesn’t have to be permanent, and I’m hoping it’s not. I would love to add Allie back to my list of Recommended Teachers, Authors, etc., if and when that becomes an option.

Additional Resource:

Unequally Yoked: When Christians Platform False Teachers at A Word Fitly Spoken

How should we respond to an invitation to attend our niece’s confirmation in the Catholic Church?

Before we get into the mechanics of how to respond, everybody take a moment and think this through. How would you respond if you were invited to a ceremony or celebration for a loved one who was becoming a Mormon? A Hindu? A member of a cult? If you’re recoiling right now, that’s the same inward response you should have if you’re invited to attend a loved one’s initiation into Catholicism.

Catholicism isn’t Christianity. It is just as anti-Christian and anti-biblical as any of those other religions.

I know it’s really difficult when someone you love has embraced an unbiblical theology and invites you to celebrate with her. You love her, you want to participate in this with her just like you participate with her in birthdays, Christmas, and other special events, and you don’t want to be the big, bad Christian meanie. But out of loyalty to Christ, you can’t celebrate blasphemy and false doctrine, and out of love for your loved one, you can’t celebrate something that’s going to send her to an eternity in Hell.

So, what do you do? I don’t know how invitations to confirmations work. If it’s like a formal wedding invitation that includes an R.s.v.p. card (or some sort of response website, like The Knot), simply mark “will not attend” and send it back.

Whether or not you explain why you won’t be attending sort of depends on how close you are to this niece and her family, whether or not they pretty much already know why you’re not attending, and whether or not you want to.

If you’re not close with the niece and her family, you were just one of the 500 other people they invited, the aforementioned R.s.v.p. (or if it’s more casual, a verbal or text, “I’m sorry, but we won’t be able to make it.”) will suffice. If you want to write a letter or email briefly explaining why you can’t biblically attend, you can do that, just be sure to keep it kind and loving rather than attacking or lecturing.

If you are close with the niece and her family and you’ve already had some discussions about why Catholicism isn’t biblical, you can simply let them know you won’t be able to make it. They probably already know why, but if they ask, you can briefly remind them of your past conversations and that your conscience won’t allow you to attend.

If you’re close with the niece and her family, and you haven’t ever had any discussions about why Catholicism is unbiblical, you can try simply responding that you won’t be able to make it, but if you’re otherwise really involved in her life, they’re going to want to know why you’d miss such an important event. Do not make up an excuse. That’s lying. Briefly explain to them why your love and loyalty to Christ and your love for your niece won’t let you attend. If you think they’re open to it and it would help, you could even send them this resource.

Additional Resources:

Roman Catholicism: Mass Confusion at A Word Fitly Spoken

Truth and Love – with Mike Gendron at A Word Fitly Spoken

¹Because I know I’m going to get the question, “Are you saying that the Robertsons aren’t Christians because they believe in baptismal regeneration?” here’s my answer: That’s something that would have to be determined on a case by case basis. They and their church also preach, teach, and believe the biblical gospel. I’ve heard them present it. If anyone genuinely repents and believes the biblical gospel, that person is saved at that moment. If he subsequently believes he has to be immediately baptized or he’s not going to Heaven when he dies, that’s a false belief, but it doesn’t negate that person’s genuine belief in the true gospel. Conversely, if he believes it’s his baptism that saves, regenerates, or justifies him, rather than repenting and believing the gospel, that person is not saved. You can see how you would really need to talk to an individual who holds to baptismal regeneration about exactly what he personally believes in order to help him understand whether or not he’s genuinely saved. Be all of that as it may, it is still a false gospel to teach that a person is not saved unless he is baptized. That is my point about the Robertsons being called upon as experts on evangelism on Allie’s show.

²I have also had followers alert me to some of the political rally-type events Allie has spoken at, and questioned whether or not she was unbiblically instructing men in the Scriptures or sharing the stage with other false teachers at these events. To be perfectly transparent, I haven’t looked into this, so I don’t know. If that’s a concern for you, I would encourage you to do the research for yourself.

If you have a question about: a Bible passage, an aspect of theology, a current issue in Christianity, or how to biblically handle a family, life, or church situation, comment below (I’ll hold all questions in queue {unpublished} for a future edition of The Mailbag) or send me an e-mail or private message. If your question is chosen for publication, your anonymity will be protected.

Discernment, False Teachers

You Might Be Apostate

March 19, 2025March 17, 2025 Michelle Lesley

Originally published June 3, 2016

Comedian Jeff Foxworthy hit the big time several years ago with his “You Might Be a Redneck” one-liners. He frequently introduced the bit by saying, “I’ve found that there are rednecks all over, but sometimes people don’t know they’re rednecks. So, I came up with this little test…” and continued with such gems as:

“If you’ve ever had to carry a bucket of paint to the top of a water tower to defend your sister’s honor, you might be a redneck.”

“If your wife has ever said, ‘Honey, come get this transmission out of the tub so I can take a bath!’ you might be a redneck.”

“If you’ve ever been accused of lying through your tooth, you might be a redneck.”

It was a routine that a lot of us in the South found hilarious because we knew someone (or were someone) who fit nearly every one of Jeff’s jabs.

Like rednecks, there are apostate false teachers all over the place out there, only a lot of them (and their disciples) don’t know they’re false teachers. And the fruit of their lives and ministries is far wackier than anything a redneck has ever dreamed up. That fruit is a sign that we’d better examine the root of doctrine from which the fruit sprang.

So if any of the preachers and teachers you’re following have ever said or done the following things (or something even crazier), watch out, because they Might Be Apostate.

If you’re a middle aged pastor who makes embarrassing rap videos, who publicly extols the virtues of Spanx for men (even though it gives you gas) and who calls himself a Ferrari you might be apostate.

If you feature a Naked Cowboy impersonater (aka- your youth “pastor”) at your “Christian” women’s conference, you might be apostate.

If you’ve ever purposefully applied the pronoun “herself” to God, you might be apostate.

If you celebrated your 35th birthday by preaching at the “church” of your mentor, T.D. Jakes, and placing a $35,000 check in his offering wheelbarrow, you might be apostate.

If God has ever told you to go up to a stranger in the airport and ask if you can brush his hair, you might be apostate.

If you’ve ever given your congregation a sob story about needing a new $70 million Gulfstream jet, because the old one is worn out, you might be apostate.

If you think of the Holy Spirit as the “sneaky,” “silly,” “funny,” “blue genie from Aladdin,” you might be apostate.

If you’re a woman who thinks God is OK with you preaching to men despite what His Word clearly says to the contrary, you might be apostate.

If you’ve ever said, regarding your church’s worship service, “I probably wouldn’t have a stripper on stage…” but leave the door open to the idea because “God told Isaiah to walk around naked for three years,” you might be apostate.

Benny Hinn at Maple Leaf Gardens on Sept. 28, 1992 photos by Tony Bock/Toronto Star and handout photo.

If you think smacking people in the face with your Nehru jacket is a ministry of the Holy Spirit, you might be apostate.

If you’ve ever typed a Facebook status in tongues, you might be apostate.

If you say you’re a trinitarian, but think the Father, Son, and Holy Ghost are three “manifestations” of God rather than three Persons, you ARE apostate.

If you think Proverbs 21:9 means you should camp out on your roof in a quest for biblical womanhood, you might be apostate.

If your senior pastor father sexually abused boys at your church and paid them off to keep them quiet and you, as the subsequent pastor, knew about it but didn’t speak up, you might be apostate.

If you officiated at your homosexual son’s “wedding,” you might be apostate.

If you’re a pastor who thinks expository preaching is “cheating” because it’s “too easy” and that “it’s not the way you grow people” AND that we shouldn’t say “the Bible says…” AND that parents who take their children to a small church instead of a mega church are “stinkin’ selfish,” AND that we shouldn’t use the Bible to convince the lost of their need for Christ, AND that we need to “unhitch” from the Old Testament, you might be apostate.

If you’re Oprah’s idea of an awesome pastor, you might be apostate.

If your preaching, ministry, and theology have ever been publicly rebuked by John MacArthur, Paul Washer, or Justin Peters, you might be apostate.

If you partnered with a Roman Catholic mystic with a degree in spiritual psychology to make a completely unbiblical movie about the Bible featuring ninja angels and Mary Magdalene bossing the disciples around, you might be apostate.

If you and your 80s rock star third husband stand in the pulpit and tell people to watch porn to improve their sex life, you might be apostate.

If a feature of your “worship service” is people laughing uncontrollably or barking like dogs, you might be apostate.

If you’ve ever decided to “p*ss off the religious people” on Easter Sunday by playing AC/DC’s Highway to Hell to open the service, you might be apostate.

If you’ve written a book entitled “I Am” and it’s about positive confession rather than Jehovah, you might be apostate.

If you think you have the power to control the weather by the words you speak, you might be apostate.

If you think that between the cross and the resurrection Jesus went to Hell and that Satan and the demons jumped up and down on His back, you might be apostate.

If the top three “pastors” you encourage people to follow on Twitter are T.D. Jakes, Rick Warren, and Joel Osteen, you might be apostate.

If a currently practicing homosexual couple wants to serve in leadership at your church and your only problem with it is that one of them isn’t yet divorced from his wife, you might be apostate.

If you’ve ever been accused of having an affair with Benny Hinn, you might be apostate.

If, a hundred years ago, your worship leaders might have been carted off to the funny farm or treated to an exorcism for conducting themselves like this, you might be apostate.

And, if you’re about to write a comment rebuking me for marking false teachers to avoid and exposing unfruitful works of darkness because Jesus would never do such a thing then you don’t know your Bible.

And you just might be apostate.

Podcast Appearances

Guest Appearance – The Plumb Line Radio Show

October 9, 2024October 8, 2024 Michelle Lesley

This summer, I had the pleasure of appearing as a guest on The Plumb Line Radio Show with Jay Rudolph to chat about the New Apostolic Reformation. How can you recognize NAR tendencies in the church and help your friends and loved ones who have fallen prey to this heresy? Listen in to these two brief interviews and find out!

The Plumb Line, episode 444- NAR- Michelle Lesley, part 1

The Plumb Line, episode 445- NAR- Michelle Lesley, part 2

If you’re in the vicinity of Des Moines, Omaha/Lincoln, Phoenix, Pittsburgh, San Diego, New York City, Jacksonville, Chicago, or Kansas City, you can listen to The Plumb Line on your local Christian radio station. Click here to find out which radio stations carry The Plumb Line and when. If you don’t live near one of those markets, you can always follow and listen on Spotify.

Additional Resources:

The Mailbag: What is the New Apostolic Reformation?

God’s Not Like “Whatever, Dude,” About The Way He’s Approached in Worship

The Mailbag: Should Christians listen to “Reckless Love”?

Got a podcast of your own or have a podcasting friend who needs a guest? Need a speaker for a women’s conference or church event? Click the “Speaking Engagements” tab in the blue menu bar at the top of this page, drop me an e-mail, and let’s chat!

Mailbag

The Mailbag: Potpourri (Leslie who?… Can I get divorced?… Were Jesus and Mary Magdalene married?)

September 3, 2024September 2, 2024 Michelle Lesley

Welcome to another “potpourri” edition of The Mailbag, where I give short(er) answers to several questions rather than a long answer to one question.

Or maybe I answered your question already? Check out my article The Mailbag: Top 10 FAQs to see if your question has been answered and to get some helpful resources.

Dear Leslie,

Hi there! I’m so glad you’ve dropped me an email or social media comment or message. I love all to pieces those of you who make this mistake, but just so you’ll know, my first name is not “Leslie”. In fact, I have four names, a first name, middle name, maiden name, and married name, and none of those names are “Leslie”.

My name is:

Michelle Lesley

Michelle is my first¹ name. Two “L’s”. Lesley is my last name. It ends with an -ey, not an -ie.

Like I said, if you’ve ever made the mistake of addressing me in writing by my first name as “Leslie,” no worries! I’m certainly not mad or upset, just amused and, after so many years of this happening, dying of curiosity. My name is clearly and prominently stated on my blog, my Facebook and X pages, and in my email address. I can kinda understand misspelling my last name with an “-ie,” but I’m not sure how some people think my last name is my first name. (It can’t be autocorrect. Autocorrect only “corrects” misspelled words, it doesn’t flip flop them, and it’s not going to autocorrect “Michelle” to “Leslie”. Right? I mean, autocorrect isn’t that bad, is it?)

Help me solve this mystery, readers, and you’ll have my undying gratitude!😀

In the meantime, I’ll just be sitting over here, thankful that I didn’t marry the first guy I was engaged to, whose last name was Stanley.😳 (Y’all wouldn’t really call me “Stanley” as my first name, would you?😂)

¹Technically, Michelle is my middle name. I have always gone by my middle name, mostly because very few people can pronounce or spell my first name without being taught. No, I’m not going to say what it is, because I’m trying to quash confusion here, not create more, and one more name would just create more confusion.

(From Michelle: This reader’s lengthy email has been extensively edited and summarized. Suffice it to say, the summary does not do justice to the detailed description of egregious events she sent me.)

My husband and I have been living apart and separated for the past 10 years. During the first three years of our marriage, he committed adultery multiple times with multiple women (even fathering a child with one woman), was physically abusive, and would not hold a job, so that I had to support our family.

My country does not allow divorce, only annulment, which costs $5000. Neither I, nor my estranged husband can afford this, however he has moved on and married again due to becoming a Muslim (Islam allows multiple wives). I want to move on with my life, too, but how?

I want to be right with God. I am a new Christian and I don’t have a permanent church yet, or I would talk to my own pastor. I have tried to reach out to other pastors. Some, I’ve been unable to meet with because I’m not a member of their church. Others tell me I cannot get a divorce and that there are no biblical grounds for divorce or annulment (most churches in my country take the permanence view of marriage).

Do I have biblical grounds to file for divorce/annulment? Can I remarry?

Honey, I’m so sorry you’re going through this terrible situation. I know it must be very difficult.

Let me start by saying that, first, I’m not crazy about the concept of annulment after several years of marriage, because an annulment is basically a declaration that the marriage never took place. And after three years and having a child together, that’s a hard argument to make. A marriage did take place, it was just a really bad one. Additionally, I don’t know how your country defines and applies it, so I’m mainly going to stick to divorce, here.

Second, to provide context for the rest of my answer, I do not hold to the permanence view. Scripture makes clear that divorce is permissible (not required, and certainly not preferable to reconciliation if that’s at all possible, but permissible) but for Christians in the case of adultery or abandonment, and it sounds like your husband is profusely guilty of both.

So, yes, you have biblical grounds for divorce, but your country doesn’t permit it, so that’s a moot point in your situation. You can save up for an annulment, but it would only be biblical to apply for one if you can honestly meet one or more of your country’s requirements. If there’s a legal possibility of going to another country to obtain a divorce, you can also explore that option. But, from the way you’ve described your situation to me, it sounds like you’re pretty much relegated to living out the permanence view whether you like it, or agree with it, or not. And that means no, until your husband dies or you find some legal and biblical means to a divorce, you may not remarry.

I know that’s bad news that you don’t really want to hear, and I sympathize that it’s a bitter pill to swallow. But I would encourage you to do a few things in this undesirable situation:

○ Give 1 Corinthians 7, particularly verse 17 through the end of the chapter, a good study. It was written for people in similar situations to yours: new Believers married to unbelievers. Notice Paul’s reassurance that “blooming where God planted you,” so to speak, is OK, and consider your situation in light of that.

Brothers, each one is to remain with God in that condition in which he was called.
1 Corinthians 7:24

God knew all about your husband and your marriage before He saved you, and He knows your circumstances now, because He’s the one who has you there. He may or may not change those circumstances. All you have to do is get up every day and walk in obedience to Him that day.

○ Study Philippians 4, particularly the part about contentment. We all have to learn how to be content in whatever circumstances God places us in.

○ Pray. Ask God to resolve this situation for His glory and your good. Ask Him to help you be obedient to Him in the meantime. Thank Him for the work He is doing in your heart through this situation to grow you in Christ. Pray for your husband. Ask your brothers and sisters in Christ to pray for you.

While you’re doing all of that, the most important thing you can do is to find a doctrinally sound local church to join. Meet with your pastor and get some godly counsel from him. Perhaps he can even point you to a godly older woman in your church who has been through something similar who can disciple you through this.

We all face circumstances that are difficult and unpleasant, but God uses those things to sanctify us.

I’m a little embarrassed to admit that I am one who used to believe that Jesus and Mary Magdalene were married and had children. Can we know for certain that is false? Why would that be a bad thing? Maybe it was meant to be kept out of the Bible for protection of the lineage? I don’t mean any disrespect to Jesus for the questioning more for my own closure.

Hey, we all used to believe things that we look back in embarrassment on now. But there’s no need to be embarrassed about that any more than we should be embarrassed that we wore diapers or drank from a bottle when we were babies. Nobody is born mature, and nobody is born again spiritually mature with all her theological ducks in a row. And that’s a blessing, because if you were, you wouldn’t be able to look back over your life and see how much the Lord has grown you!

If someone came to me and tried to argue that Jesus and Mary Magdalene were married and had children, I would ask her to show me where – chapter and verse of black and white, written on the page Scripture – the Bible says that. I would encourage you to try that on yourself. Search the Scriptures forward, backward, and upside down. You’re not going to find it. It wasn’t kept out of the Bible to protect Jesus’ lineage, rather, it wasn’t put in the Bible in the first place because it didn’t happen.

This fairytale is called an “argument from silence”. Scripture doesn’t explicitly say Jesus and Mary M. weren’t married (probably because it never entered the gospel authors’ minds that anybody would ever come up with that dumb of a lie) so the overactive, addled imagination of some heretic somewhere came up with the idea and tried to cram it in between the lines. Following that line of logic, how do we know Jesus didn’t have any Martians as disciples? How do we know the Israelites didn’t eat pizza in the wilderness? How do we know Noah didn’t have a Jacuzzi on the ark? This is not how Christians handle Scripture. This is how scoffers and mockers handle Scripture.

But this is an especially ridiculous (not you, but whoever came up with it) idea because it’s about Jesus. Just off the top of my head:

The Bible isn’t going to leave out that major of a detail about Jesus’ life. That would be equivalent to God lying to those of us who weren’t there to see for ourselves whether or not He was married.
Being married would have interfered with and been a distraction from Jesus’ ministry. He would have had to work to support His family, spend time with them, and train His children. Jesus was an itinerant evangelist. He didn’t have a job. He didn’t even have a home. His ministry took up all His time. None of that is conducive to having a wife and children, especially with Old Testament teachings and cultural expectations for husbands and fathers. Besides, 1 Corinthians 7:32-34 says:

One who is unmarried is concerned about the things of the Lord, how he may please the Lord. But one who is married is concerned about the things of the world, how he may please his wife, and his interests have been divided.

Jesus was famous. Tens of thousands of people observed Him during His life. Among that many people, you can’t possibly keep a secret as big as a marriage and children.
Aside from the fact that it’s nowhere even hinted at in the gospels, none of the authors of Scripture mention it in any of the other books of the New Testament. Marriage and fatherhood are taught extensively in the New Testament. If Jesus had been a husband and father, why wouldn’t the New Testament authors have pointed to Him as the perfect example of both? They certainly point to Him plenty of times as our perfect example of other things.
No credible extra-biblical historical works, letters, or other materials mention Jesus being married and having children.

It would not have been sinful for Jesus to have been married with children if that had been God’s plan for Him. But Jesus had a lot of work to do in a short amount of time. He didn’t need the added distraction and responsibility of being a husband and father. What’s sinful here is for someone to lie about Jesus being married and having children, or to repeat the lie to others and confuse them. I’m sorry someone did that to you.

Discernment, Mailbag

The Mailbag: Potpourri (Book rec on being a godly sister?… Pants war with parents… Why isn’t ___ on the false teacher list?)

June 25, 2024August 7, 2024 Michelle Lesley

Welcome to another “potpourri” edition of The Mailbag, where I give short(er) answers to several questions rather than a long answer to one question.

Or maybe I answered your question already? Check out my article The Mailbag: Top 10 FAQs to see if your question has been answered and to get some helpful resources.

My oldest daughter is turning 12 this week, and I see a lot of heart issues in her that I would like to help her with. She is a triplet, and also has three younger siblings, and I think she feels like she doesn’t get as much attention from me because of the neediness of the other children, which has turned into bitterness and disrespectful attitudes in her. Is there a book that you know of that I could take her through that would help us both with these things? Really, anything directed at her age discussing how to be a godly older sister. I want to be a good mom for her, raising her to be a kind and loving older sister, but I feel like I am failing.

Being a mom is pretty challenging, and we all have moments and seasons when we feel like we’re failing. Ask the best, most godly mom you know, and I’m sure she’ll agree. Sometimes, it’s because we have failed, which means we need to repent – to God and to our children – and obey Him. But often, we take those feelings of failure upon ourselves when we’re truly doing our best, and/or when the situation is unavoidable or isn’t our fault.

Let me give you a few resources that may help…

First, you’ll want to get your own heart and mind in order – according to Scripture – about your feelings of failure. Check out my article: Guilt and Shame- Burden or Blessing?

Next, I’d like to suggest you read my article You Don’t Need *A* Book, You Need *THE* Book. Christians are readers, and that’s a good thing, but a book written by another human being isn’t always the best thing. Find out why, and what’s better. You might also enjoy my article Avoiding the Creepers: Six Ways to Raise a Biblically Strong Woman.

Your daughter is the perfect age for the two of you to study the Bible together. If she’s not yet a Believer, you’ll want to explain the gospel to her. If she is a Believer, study through a book of the Bible together. The Bible is a book, it’s directed at her age, and it addresses all of the things you’ve mentioned both textually and transformatively. (If I may be a little blunt: your daughter needs godly parenting from the best people for the job – you and your husband – and either salvation or sanctification by the Holy Spirit more than she needs to read a book written by someone else.) If you’d like, the two of you might also enjoy working through my Bible study Imperishable Beauty: A Study of Biblical Womanhood. Studying Scripture together will also help address the issue of her feeling like she’s not getting enough attention from you.

And don’t forget to pray for your daughter on your own, with your husband, and with her. Prayer is also transformative. It will help you, your husband, and your daughter get on the same page with God.

Finally, let your church be the resource for you that God wants it to be. This is a textbook Titus 2:3-5 situation. Find a godly older woman in your church or in your family, and ask for her help and guidance. If you don’t know anyone like that, set up an appointment with your pastor for counsel and ask him to point you in the direction of a godly older woman who can disciple you through this.

Although doctrinally sound books can sometimes be helpful, the means and methods God has prescribed in Scripture – the Word, prayer, and the church – should always be our “Plan A”.

I’m 19 years of age and I’m currently at war with my parents because I told them I wanted to start wearing pants. They believe my salvation is not real because I’m going against Deuteronomy 22:5…..And it has made me so confused about my stand with God. Am I really sinning against God or am I misunderstanding something?

I think there’s definitely some misunderstanding and some sin going on here, but maybe not like you might be thinking. Let’s sort it out according to Scripture.

In and of itself, it is not a sin for a Christian woman to wear modest women’s pants. If your parents genuinely think you’re not saved solely because you want to wear modest women’s pants, then they are misunderstanding Deuteronomy 22:5 (and possibly the New Testament concept of Christians being under the covenant of grace rather than the Mosaic covenant). I’ve explained all of this in detail in my article The Mailbag: May Christian Women Wear Pants?.

However there are sins being committed in this situation that you may not have considered. If you’re “at war” with your parents about this or any other issue of adiaphora/Christian liberty, you’re probably committing the sins of pride, dishonoring/disobeying your parents, failing to live at peace with them so far as you’re able, and failing to bear with their weakness in this area. (Your parents may also be committing some of these sins as well as provoking you to anger, but you can only control whether or not you’re sinning, and how you react to their sins.) I would encourage you to study the Scriptures I’ve linked here, ask God to humble you and help you understand whether or not you’ve sinned in any of these areas, and, if you have, repent – to God and to your parents.

Now, there is one more dynamic at play here: It doesn’t sound like you’re married, so are you still living under your parents’ roof and/or financial support (e.g. You live in a dorm or apartment they’re paying for, they’re paying for your education, etc.) or are you living on your own and supporting yourself? Those are two different kettles of fish.

Your parents have the right to make the rules for their house, and they have the right to decide what they will and won’t support financially, even if those rules and conditions seem wrong, ridiculous, or unfair to you. At nineteen, you are an adult, and you have the right to decide whether you want to live under those rules in their house, and whether you want to abide by the conditions under which they will financially support you. It’s just a question of which is more important to you at this point in your life – housing and financial support or wearing pants. If you want to live at their house and/or receive their money, you need to humble yourself and abide by their rules without complaining. If you want to wear pants, you need to move out and pay your own way.

A few final thoughts:

If you’re still living at home or receiving financial support from your parents, you can lovingly and humbly ask if they might be open to the compromise of you wearing split skirts or palazzo pants / skirts. Go into this conversation prepared to graciously accept an answer of “no”.

Give 1 Peter 3:1-6 a good study. This passage is not about the parent-child relationship, but about Christian wives softening their unsaved husbands’ hearts to the gospel by their godly, submissive behavior. Are there any principles you can glean from this passage that can be applied to your relationship with your parents as you submit to their authority in their home and under their financial support?

When you do move out and support yourself, you’re free to wear modest women’s pants whenever you like, but Scripture doesn’t allow us to exercise our Christian liberties in ways that unnecessarily offend others. In other words, when you go visit your parents, put on a skirt.

I am curious as to why Kenneth Copeland and Rhema Bible College [founded by Kenneth Hagin] are NOT on your list of false teachers. Thank you for your ministry but I believe these are important ones to highlight as well.

I agree, the two Kenneths are/were rank heretics, and Rhema “Bible” College knows nothing of the Bible. No one should have anything to do with any of them.

Here’s why they (and a number of other blatant heretics) are not listed at my Popular False Teachers & Unbiblical Trends tab (in the blue menu bar at the top of this page). Let’s start with an excerpt from that page that perhaps you didn’t see:

Please understand that this is not a comprehensive list of every false teacher in existence (there are thousands of them, so that would be impossible)… I provide information here largely in answer to questions from my readers. In other words, if you don’t see it, it’s either because I haven’t been asked about it, or I haven’t had time to get to it yet. The names you see are simply some of the most well-known teachers my readers have inquired about.

Generally speaking, my audience consists mostly of Christian women in passable to vibrantly doctrinally sound churches. They’re not asking me if the Kenneths are false teachers; they can watch or listen to five minutes of either of those guys and know.

Women who are so undiscerning that they’re following these guys are almost certainly not saved (and aren’t following me). What they need is to repent and believe the gospel, or they’re neither going to understand why, nor believe that the Kenneths are heretics, and, like the pigs and dogs they are, spiritually speaking, they’re going to turn and attack me for trying to convince them

There are tens of thousands of false teachers out there. I am one person with a husband, family, church responsibilities, friends, a podcast, speaking engagements, and other topics I have to blog about. I have to spend my time, not on the obvious false teachers, but on the more subtle ones my readers are actually asking about.

I have also attempted to help out readers who don’t find the false teacher they’re looking for on the list (again, from my Popular False Teachers & Unbiblical Trends page):

Don’t see the name of the teacher you’re looking for in the lists below? Check out my article Is She a False Teacher? 7 Steps to Figuring It Out on Your Own.

In this article, you’ll not only learn how to research teachers for yourself (a skill every Christian should develop), you’ll also find a list of trustworthy discernment ministries who may have the information you’re looking for.

Tag: Heresy