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Michelle Lesley

~ Discipleship for Christian Women

Michelle Lesley

Category Archives: Ministry

Top 10 Ways to Appreciate Your Pastors During Pastor Appreciation Month

13 Friday Oct 2017

Posted by Michelle Lesley in Church, Encouragement, Ministry, Top 10

≈ 3 Comments

Tags

Associate Pastor, Church, Clergy Appreciation, Clergy Appreciation Day, Clergy Appreciation Month, Encourage Pastor, Encouragement, Minister of Music, Ministry, Ministry Encouragement, October, Pastor, Pastor Appreciation, Pastor Appreciation Day, Pastor Appreciation Month, Special days in October, Worship leader, Youth Director, Youth Minister, Youth Pastor

I’m so glad somebody thought up the idea of Pastor Appreciation Month and made it a thing. If you’ve never been a pastor (or been married to one), it’s difficult to adequately convey just how simultaneously challenging, joyful, devastating, frustrating, and fulfilling it can be. If you have a good pastor, who rightly divides God’s Word and is a man of godly character, you are very blessed. And that goes for your minister of music, associate pastor, youth pastor, etc., too. Be sure you show all of them (there’s nothing worse than being left out while everybody else is being appreciated) your appreciation for their hard work, and your encouragement, support, and love not just during Pastor Appreciation Month, but all year through. Here are ten ways you can do just that.

1. Pray for your pastors.
Time and again, when pastors are surveyed about what their church members can do to bless them the most, the number one answer is, “Pray for me.” Your pastors need you to pray for them personally, in their work, for their marriages and families, and for the health of your church. Pastor Appreciation Month is a perfect time to make a commitment to pray for your pastors on a regular basis. (And don’t forget to periodically tell them you’re praying for them!) Need some suggestions on how to pray? Check out my article Top 10 Ways to Pray for Your Pastor.

2. Words of encouragement
Pastors get a lot of complaints, criticism, and words of discouragement. Brighten your pastor’s day by telling him something specific you learned during the sermon. Tell your minister of music you really enjoyed the choir anthem this morning. Repeat to your youth pastor something positive your child has said about him or the youth group. Drop your pastor a note, e-mail, or social media message of support. Make a point of looking for ways – all year long – that you can offer “a word fitly spoken.”

3. Babysit
If your pastor and his wife have young children, offer to babysit so they can have a date night or go Christmas shopping for the kids. 

4. Gift cards
Perhaps along with the offer to babysit, you could give your pastor and his wife a gift card to a local restaurant. Gift cards to his favorite specialty store (outdoorsman stores, music stores, etc.), a Christian retailer, or one of his favorite online stores (or a more general site like Amazon if you’re not sure of his preferences) make great tokens of appreciation, too.

5. Honorary offerings
Is there a certain missionary or mission project that’s near and dear to your pastor’s heart? A crisis pregnancy center? A church plant he’d like to support? What about donating Gideon Bibles? Put out the word to the congregation, take up a special offering (or simply give as an individual), and make a donation in your pastor’s name.

6. Make sure his needs are met.
Your pastors shouldn’t be living like televangelists, but they shouldn’t be struggling to survive, either. Surprisingly, many people have unbiblical opinions about pastors’ salaries, from the notion that anyone in any kind of ministry should be doing it for free, to the downright evil concept of keeping the pastor near the poverty level to make sure he stays humble (yes, really). The Bible says pastors have a right to make their living from preaching the gospel, and that a workman is worthy of his hire. Check with your church’s finance and/or personnel committee. Is your pastor making an appropriate salary? Are his housing and insurance needs being met? Is he receiving adequate vacation and sick days? If not, see what you can do to help rectify the situation.

7. Conferences
There are lots of fantabulous Christian conferences out there that your pastor would probably love to attend, but it’s not in the church budget and he can’t afford it, personally. Find out his favorite or choose a great one (make sure you vet the speakers first to make sure they’re doctrinally sound), take up a special offering, and send him there, all expenses paid (conference admission and fees, travel, meals, lodging, and some extra “walking around money” for purchasing books, gifts, souvenirs, etc.).

8. Volunteer
One of the things that can be stressful for pastors is empty positions that need godly people to fill them. Volunteer to teach that Sunday School class, play the piano at the nursing home, help chaperone the youth trip, work in the nursery, get trained and run the sound board. Find out where you’re needed at your church and jump in and serve.

9. Help out around the house.
Pastors have those “fix it” needs around the house just like everybody else does. Are you good at repairing cars, fixing roofs, mowing grass, maintaining air conditioning units, cooking meals, or another special skill? Save your pastor some time, money, and effort by putting your experience to work for him at his home. 

10. Set the example of a healthy church member.
What could be more encouraging to a pastor than biblically healthy church members? Study your Bible. Be faithful in your church attendance. Pray for your pastor and the church. Serve where you’re needed. Don’t complain or criticize your pastor and others over petty matters. Avoid controversies and personality conflicts, and be a peacemaker. Walk in humility and selflessness, and give glory to God. Show appreciation for your pastors by setting a godly example for other church members and encouraging them to do the same. 

💥Bonus!  💥 Get on social media, e-mail, or the phone and share this article around so your pastors don’t have to!

What are some other good ways we can show appreciation for,
and encourage, our pastors?

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Let Me Count the Ways: 75 Ways Women Can Biblically Minister to Others

01 Friday Sep 2017

Posted by Michelle Lesley in Christian women, Church, Complementarianism, Ministry

≈ 8 Comments

Tags

Biblical Womanhood, Christian Women, Church Leadership, church ministries, Complementarian, Complementarianism, how can women serve in church, ministries, Ministry, Women and the Church, Women in Ministry, Women's Roles in the Church, Womens Ministry

I recently heard someone remark that, among complementarian Christians, there’s a lot of emphasis on the things women can’t do, biblically, when it comes to ministry, but not much has been written about how women can serve in ministry without violating Scripture.

There are some valid reasons for that.

First, the false teaching of egalitarianism (women can hold any position in ministry that men can hold) is running rampant through the church, even infecting traditionally conservative churches and denominations. It is imperative that Christian men and women who have a biblical understanding of the role of women in the church continue to teach loudly, boldly, and relentlessly against this doctrinal error.

Next, there are so many ways women can serve the body of Christ without violating Scripture that it would be impossible to list all of them. The prohibitions placed on women in ministry are comparatively infinitesimal and, therefore, faster and simpler to dispense with. In other words, it’s quicker and easier to say, “Women can serve in literally any scriptural position or function of ministry in the Body as long as they’re not instructing men in the Scriptures or holding authority over them,” than it is to list every particular ministry women can participate in without transgressing God’s word.

But sometimes our brains get stuck and we need some specific, real world examples to oil the gears and get our own thought processes moving. Especially when we hit that mental roadblock of “Ministry equals only preaching, teaching, and leadership positions. Period.” That’s not all ministry is. In fact, it’s only a tiny part of ministry. God uniquely gifts His people in a variety of ways for a variety of services. And Scripture is very clear that all members of the Body are essential regardless of the role God has called us to. Jesus was the best preacher, teacher, and leader of all eternity, and yet the pinnacle of His ministry was not a sermon, a Bible lesson, or position of leadership. The most important act of ministry Jesus ever performed was to humble Himself and to give His life for sinners. Let’s make sure we think about ministry the way Jesus thought about ministry:

…whoever would be great among you must be your servant, and whoever would be first among you must be slave of all. For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.” Mark 10:43b-45

Keeping that in mind, here are just a few of the ways women can freely serve God, their churches, and their neighbors without violating Scripture:

1. Pray for your church, your pastor and staff, your teachers and elders

2.  Teach a women’s Bible study or Sunday School class. (Remember, teaching isn’t the only avenue of ministry, but it is one of them.)

3. Teach a children’s Sunday School or Bible class.

4. Play an instrument in your church’s music ministry.

5. Sing in the choir or on the praise team.

6. Direct a children’s choir.

7. Run the Power Point for song lyrics during the worship service

8. Learn how to run your sanctuary’s sound system and board

9. Help set up and put away chairs for services or classes

10. Be the hero who gets to church early and has the coffee ready when people arrive

11. Serve as a greeter

12. Serve on the security or parking lot duty team

13. Serve in the nursery

14. Volunteer to help out in the church office

15. Serve as a chaperone for a youth trip, fellowship, or other activity

16. Open your home to traveling pastors or missionaries who need a place to stay

17. Volunteer your home for the next church fellowship

18. Organize a potluck dinner for your church or Sunday School class

19. Take some treats up to the church office during the week to encourage the staff

20. Serve in Vacation Bible School

21. Offer to help your pastor vet new Bible study and Sunday School curricula for doctrinal soundness

22. Go on and/or help organize a short term mission trip

23. Organize meals for a new mom or a church member who’s ill

24. Help clean the church kitchen after an activity or event

25. Visit hospitalized church members

26. Visit church members who are shut-ins or in nursing homes

27. Pick up someone who needs a ride to and from church

28. Nursing home residents often have no way to attend church. Organize a way for your church to take church to the nursing home.

29. Many people have difficulty attending church because they’re caretakers for an ill or disabled loved one. Set up a rotation of church members to be sitters so the caretaker can come to church.

30. Mow the church’s grass

31. Serve on a committee

32. Volunteer your IT expertise for the church’s computer system

33. Open your home to a college student who needs a place to live

34. Open your home to a woman in a crisis pregnancy who has nowhere else to go

35. Teach cooking, homemaking, or parenting skills to the younger women of your church.

36. Start an after school tutoring program at your church where kids get help with their homework and hear the gospel.

37. Volunteer at a Christian crisis pregnancy center

38. Organize and serve at a church work day (cleaning, painting, facility maintenance)

39. Donate money, gift cards, gas cards, or hotel vouchers to your church’s benevolence fund

40. Get trained in disaster relief and serve the physical and spiritual needs of those impacted by natural disasters

41. Serve in your church’s food pantry

42. Serve in your church’s clothes closet

43. Help organize fundraisers for missions, youth camp, disaster relief, church needs, etc.

44. If your church decorates the grounds for Christmas or other special events, lend a hand

45. Start a backyard Bible club (Bible lesson, game/activity, snack) at a park, apartment complex, school, or other gathering place near your church

46. Start a women’s prayer group with sisters at church

47. Organize a “mechanic ministry” – church members who can fix and maintain the cars of your church’s widows and single moms

48. Organize a “honey-do ministry” – same idea but for repair jobs around the house

49. Disciple a younger woman one on one

50. Invite new church members over for dinner

51. Be your Sunday School class’ secretary or fellowship organizer

52. Take food baskets to church members who are in need

53. Do baptistry duty (help those being baptized with robes, towels, etc.)

54. Set up a sewing or craft ministry, making items for the elderly, disabled, newborns, the homeless, or missions. This idea is one of my favorites (don’t forget to include the gospel, verbally or in print, with your ministry project items).

55. If your church is in a high traffic area, stand out front on hot days and hand out bottled water and tracts to passers by (be safety conscious). You can also put a sticker or label on the bottle with your church’s info or a web site that gives a gospel presentation.

56. Sit and talk – but mostly listen – to the elderly people in your church. You’ll minister to them, and they’ll minister to you.

57. Serve on your church’s wedding, funeral, or special event team

58. Volunteer to care for small children of wedding or funeral attendees in your church’s nursery during the event

59. Work in your church library, or set one up

60. Organize a Parents’ Night Out so church members with young children can have a couples’ night without the expense of a babysitter

61. Babysit your pastor’s children so he and his wife can have a date night

62. Clergy appreciation month is October. Organize gifts or other demonstrations of appreciation for your pastor, minister of music, associate pastor, youth director, etc. (Make sure none of your ministers are inadvertently overlooked.)

63. Teach an ESL (English as a Second Language) class to minister to church members and others who are learning English.

64. Write letters and e-mails of encouragement to the missionaries your church supports (send care packages too!)

65. Send texts of encouragement to your Sunday School class members

66. Start a birthday card ministry. Pray for each church member as you send out his or her card. In a year, you will have prayed individually for every member of your church.

67. If you’re a health care professional, volunteer to provide basic health or dental screenings to church members in need.

68. Minister to battered women at your local shelter by listening, sharing the gospel, and caring for their material needs.

69. Instead of Toys for Tots, organize a “Bibles for Tots” drive for Christmas. Give young readers Bibles to children at local schools, the mall, or a community event as a Christmas gift from your church.

70. Research and write a book about the history of your church.

71. Help set up for the Lord’s Supper

72. Do laundry duty. Take home towels and robes after baptisms, table cloths after church dinners, costumes after the choir’s musical, etc., launder them, fold them and return them to the church.

73. Go to the grocery store and run other errands for church members unable to do these things for themselves.

74. Run your church’s web site or admin your church’s social media accounts

75. Organize an abortion clinic sidewalk ministry team from your church

As I said, there are so many ways women can biblically participate in ministering to others that there’s no way to even think of all the possibilities. But I’d love to add more ideas to this list.

That’s where you come in!

What are some ways you, women at your church, or women you know at other churches minister to others without teaching or preaching to men and without holding authority over men in the gathered body of Believers? Leave a comment and let’s see how many more ways women can minister biblically!

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How Can Christians Help Victims of Hurricane Harvey?

29 Tuesday Aug 2017

Posted by Michelle Lesley in Ministry, Tragedy

≈ 9 Comments

Tags

christian disaster relief, Christian Harvey relief, disaster relief, Flood Donations, Flood Relief, Flood Relief Ministry, Flood Volunteers, Harvey relief, Hurricane Harvey, Hurricane relief, southern baptist disaster relief

I originally published this article on August 21, 2016, just a few days after the historic flood in my own area last year. I am re-running part of it now (along with some current tips about disaster relief) because the situation in the Houston/Galveston/Corpus Christi area in the aftermath of Hurricane Harvey is going to be nearly identical when it comes to flood relief efforts. If you have midweek services at your church this week, it might be a good time to get with your pastor and fellow church members to talk about how your church can help.

And just to drive home the point of how much help is going to be desperately needed in Texas, the one year anniversary of the Baton Rouge area flood was about a week ago, and we still have many people who are not yet back in their homes and need help rebuilding.


Originally published August 21, 2016

high-water-123201_1280Imagine 90% of the homes and businesses in your town destroyed by a flood. Thousands of your friends and neighbors rescued from rapidly rising deadly currents by boat, sometimes, literally, with only the clothes on their backs. Some separated from spouses or young children for days because they had to get into different boats and ended up at different shelters. No homes to go back to. No jobs to go back to because businesses flood just like homes do. No cars to drive because cars flood, too. No clothes, no food, and often, no money to rebuild and replace everything they owned.

Now try to imagine, in the aftermath, having to choose whether to scramble to clean out your own flood ravaged house before it molds and mildews or helping a loved one who desperately needs you. Or, if your home didn’t flood, feeling torn between helping your family, your best friend, your church, and other relief ministries.

This is the situation my community, and communities across south Louisiana, are facing right now. Those of us whose homes and businesses God spared are doing what we can to help friends, loved ones, and strangers, but we are spread dreadfully thin. Shelters and relief ministries are in desperate need of food, supplies, and volunteers.

In Louisiana, we take great pride in taking care of our own, and our locals are doing an astounding job of it. But the situation is so overwhelming that this time we need help.

We need your help. We need your church’s help.

How? Could you spare a few days or more to come down and volunteer with a flood relief ministry? Could your church send a team? Would you like to make a donation, or could your church collect a love offering, to help the many people whose lives have been turned upside down by the flood?


The areas of Texas hit by Hurricane Harvey are going to need tons of help, too. I am certainly no expert in disaster relief, but, having helped out in my own area last year, here are some observations and suggestions:

First, if you go to a doctrinally sound church near a hurricane damaged area that will be helping with flood relief efforts, please contact me so I can help get the word out. (This needs to be a church you have personal, solid knowledge about regarding both their theology and organized flood relief efforts.)

For those in other areas of the country who would like to help:

If you have a contact at a church near a hurricane damaged area, get with that person and find out how their church is helping or needs help.

If you don’t have a contact in the area, get with your local Southern Baptist association (you can do this even if you’re not Southern Baptist) and find out if they’re organizing help, offering disaster relief training, or collecting donations. If you don’t have a local association, contact Southern Baptist Disaster Relief and find out if they could use a team from your church or if you could make a donation.

There are two reasons I strongly recommend donating to, or volunteering with, SBDR or a local doctrinally sound church rather than a secular or governmental agency: first, SBDR or a trustworthy church will not merely help people with physical needs, they will also share the gospel with the people they’re helping, and that could make this hurricane the best thing that’s ever happened to somebody. Second, as my area witnessed with local churches, the “Cajun Navy,” and other neighbor helping neighbor relief efforts, it seems like the more grassroots the organization, the better and less expensive the help. I even heard a government official say something similar to that on the news yesterday.

Three things I would not recommend:

1. Do not just get a bunch of people together and drive to Texas with no contact person to organize your group, especially right now when the resource grid is down. That is not “stepping out on faith,” that is acting in foolishness, and possibly doing more harm than good. You need to have a confirmed place to stay, access to food, working plumbing and utilities, and somebody to put you to work where work is needed.

2. I would personally not recommend donating to Red Cross based on what I have heard from local flood victims. They have a very high overhead, and I have heard nothing but complaints about how they deal with people personally and the red tape that’s involved with getting help. Again, if you’re going to donate, I strongly recommend either donating to SBDR or directly to a church in the area that’s helping people and sharing the gospel with them.

3. This one comes from a local pastor friend who is still coordinating flood relief efforts in my area: Do not randomly send used clothing to the area.

(In fact if you want good, godly, expert, practical advice on flood relief, just go over to Todd’s Facebook page and start scrolling. He’s got lots of great resources and information over there.)

If your church can put together a team to travel to Texas to help and you can wait a few months to go, you may want to consider that. What’s going to happen is that a lot of people are going to volunteer right now while Harvey is fresh on everybody’s mind, and then people are going to forget about it and go about life as usual. But the hurricane victims will still need help months down the road from now. Start thinking about Thanksgiving break, Christmas break, 2018 winter/Easter/spring break when students and other people in your church might be off school and work. That will also give you time to start collecting monetary (and material, if needed) donations to take with you.

Don’t forget about the little guys. Something I observed with both last year’s flooding and Hurricane Katrina was that media attention was focused almost exclusively on the major cities of Baton Rouge and New Orleans. Smaller towns and rural areas were virtually ignored (even though, during last year’s flood, it was a few smaller towns on the outskirts of Baton Rouge that received the majority of the damage) in the coverage. With the media’s current focus on Houston, it looks like the same thing is happening with Harvey. When you’re thinking about flood relief, don’t forget about the small towns and rural areas that may have received even more damage than the major cities and have fewer resources.

Pray. Tangible help is desperately needed, but spiritual help is even more important. And God is the One who coordinates that disaster relief. Pray for specific people you know. Pray for the spread of the gospel. Pray that Christians affected by the hurricane will grow in their dependence on Christ. Pray that God will provide for the needs of the people. Pray that God will give Christian disaster relief workers the right words and opportunities to share the gospel with people.

Let’s all be in prayer for those affected by this devastating hurricane.

PLEASE SEE THE COMMENTS SECTION FOR READER SUGGESTIONS AND  INFORMATION ON HOW YOU CAN HELP THOSE IMPACTED BY HURRICANE HARVEY.

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Throwback Thursday ~ Used by God

18 Thursday May 2017

Posted by Michelle Lesley in Ministry, Throwback Thursday

≈ 4 Comments

Tags

Christian Celebrities, Faithful Servant, Ministry, Obedience, Platform, Platformers, Servanthood, Used by God

Originally published April 9, 2015

When I was sixteen years old, I was convinced God was calling me to be the next Sandi Patty (if you’re under 40, she was the Kari Jobe of my day). I had been singing solos and in church choirs since I was in the second grade. I was taking professional voice lessons and spent my first year of college as a vocal performance major. Not to toot my own horn here, but, while I’m not the greatest singer in the world, certainly not even in the top 10 or 20 percent, I’m also not one of those people you see during the audition rounds of American Idol who makes you want to conduct a nationwide manhunt for every person who ever lied to this poor soul and told her she could sing just so you can beat all of them senseless with a pitch pipe.

But anyway…

I had a modicum of talent and I wanted to put it to work doing “great things for the Lord.” I wanted God to use me- to put me on a stage every night in front of thousands of people so I could sing to them about Him.

Paragon of adolescent spiritual maturity that I was, it somehow never occurred to me to care what God thought about all this or what He might want to do in my life. If I thought about it at all, I just assumed He was on board with my plans. Like, how could He not be, right?

Because even in my day, that was the subtle message that was coming from the pulpit (and Christian media) and landing in the pew: If you really love Jesus and prove it by walking faithfully with Him, He’s going to use you to do some big, fat, hairy thing for Him. You’ll be the next David or Esther or Paul or Mary, and your name will go down in history just like theirs did. You’ll be famous, dahling.

Only I’m not really sure where Christian preachers, authors, and entertainers got this idea, because it sure as heck isn’t in the Bible.

The Bible knows nothing of the idea that we can behave our way into getting God to “use” us in some big way. Quite the opposite, in fact. Take a look at some of the “big names” in the Bible and what they were up to when God drafted them.

Noah- just a godly guy trying to survive a sin sick world

Moses- on the lam for murder and hanging out in the desert with a bunch of sheep

Paul- Christian-killer

David- more sheep

Gideon- just trying to feed his family

Peter- gone fishin’

Abraham- even more sheep

Were some of these guys walking faithfully with the Lord? Absolutely. But they were walking faithfully simply because they loved the Lord and desired to please Him, not with the goal of getting God to do some big thing in their lives. In fact, most of them were downright shocked when God showed up and revealed His plans for them.

And have you ever noticed that God doesn’t just use “good guys,” or guys who eventually become “good guys”? Ever read the story of Samson? Going strictly by his words and behavior mentioned in Judges 14-16, the dude comes off as a self-centered, slobbering ball of lust with anger management issues. Yet, knowing all about him before he was even born, God said He would use Samson to “…begin to save Israel from the hand of the Philistines.” (Judges 13:5)

And what about Pharaoh? In Exodus 9:16, God says to Pharaoh, “But for this purpose I have raised you up, to show you my power, so that my name may be proclaimed in all the earth.” The plagues…the parting of the Red Sea…I’d say God used Pharoah for His glory in a pretty big way.

God can use anybody He wants for any purpose He wants, and He’s not at the mercy of their behavior in doing so.

What do we mean when we say we want to be “used by God,” anyway? I think what we often have in mind is something awesome, something grandiose. Something that will bring us fame, fortune, and glory. I’ve never heard someone say she wanted God to use her for His glory like God used Job.

Or, for that matter, Jesus.

The greatest event in the universe, the one that brought God more glory than any other phenomenon in the history of ever, was also the most excruciating moment of sorrow and suffering eternity has ever known: the crucifixion of Christ for our sin.

When we say we want God to use us, we want the stupendous, not the suffering. The crown, not the cross. Yet it is often in suffering that God is most glorified. So, just whose glory is it we’re seeking, again?

If you live your life clamoring after God to make you an Esther or a Paul, or a Sandi Patty or a Billy Graham, you are almost certainly going to be disappointed. And not just because there are only a handful of “big name” God-followers out there compared to the nameless millions who have followed Him faithfully in obscurity, but because being used by God in some big, ostentatious way is not what He calls us to clamor after.

When you stand in front of God on the Day of Judgment, He’s not going to say, “Well done. You did some phenomenal things for Me that people are still talking about!” He’s going to say, “Well done, good and faithful servant.”

Faithful servants aren’t out to change the world, they just obey. They go where they’re told to go. They do what they’re told to do. And they do it to honor their masters.

For servants of Christ, most of the time that means getting up every day and doing the same humble tasks over and over for a lifetime: cooking meals, going to work, changing diapers, serving the church, cleaning the house. You know, servant stuff, all done to the glory of God. This is what God calls us to.

God doesn’t call us to seek to be used, He calls us to seek to be faithful.

“So you also, when you have done all that you were commanded, say, ‘We are unworthy servants; we have only done what was our duty’.” Luke 17:10


The famous people mentioned in this article are mentioned for frame of reference purposes only – because they are recognizable names with large platforms in evangelicalism – not because I’m recommending you follow them. I am aware of the biblical issues with each of them.


THIS ARTICLE WAS ORIGINALLY PUBLISHED AT SATISFACTION THROUGH CHRIST.

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Mary and Martha and Jesus and Women’s Ministry

11 Wednesday Jan 2017

Posted by Michelle Lesley in Christian women, Ministry

≈ 5 Comments

Tags

Bible Study, Biblical Womanhood, Christian Women, Church, Jesus, Ladies Bible Study, Mary and Martha, Women's Bible Study, Womens Ministry

This week, I’ll be sharing a few of my favorite
articles from recent years. Enjoy!

Originally published March 11, 2016

mary martha jesus womens ministry

You remember the story. Jesus comes to Mary and Martha’s house. Martha’s Pinteresting up the place while Mary sits at Jesus’ feet to listen to Him teach. Martha gripes to Jesus that Mary should help her and Jesus says no because it’s better for her to listen to Him than fold napkins into the shape of swans or whatever. Moral of the story- Martha needs to relax and not let other things distract her from Jesus.

That’s a good, true, and important takeaway from this passage, and one that we would all do well to heed.

But did you ever stop to think that Mary and Martha aren’t the main characters in this story? Jesus is. Jesus is the main character in every Bible story, so our primary focus should always be on Him: what He said and did and was like.

What was Jesus teaching that day at Mary and Martha’s house? The passage doesn’t tell us the topic He was speaking about, but we are privy to a very important lesson He imparted through the scenario with Mary and Martha. A lesson about the way God loves and values women.

Remember how women were generally regarded at that time? They didn’t have much more value than livestock, furniture, or a man’s other possessions. They were considered intellectually inferior, they weren’t formally educated, and their legal and social standing were often tenuous at best. They could not go beyond the Court of the Women at the temple for worship. There was even a traditional prayer Jewish men recited in which they thanked God for not making them a woman, a Gentile, or a slave. Women were low man on the totem pole, so to speak.

And that’s where we find Martha. She wasn’t doing anything wrong that day. In fact, in her culture, she was doing everything right. If anything, Mary would have been the one viewed as being in the wrong because the teaching was for the men, and it was the women’s job to bustle around taking care of all the hospitality duties. Martha knew this. Mary knew this. Jesus knew this. Everyone else present knew this. Martha must have wondered why someone hadn’t yet shooed Mary out of the living room and into the kitchen. So her statement to Jesus in verse 40, “Lord, do you not care that my sister has left me to serve alone? Tell her then to help me,” was probably not just, “I need another pair of hands,” but also a bit of, “Mary is forgetting her place. This isn’t what proper women do.”

Oh yes it is.

Whatever else He might have been lecturing about that day, that was one of the lessons Jesus taught Mary, Martha, the rest of their guests, and Christendom at large.

Women aren’t second class citizens in the Kingdom of God. We are precious and valuable to Him. He has important, worthwhile work for us to do – His way – in the body of Christ. And He wants us trained in His word in order to carry out that work.

How did Jesus teach that lesson?

First, He allowed Mary to stay and receive His teaching (39). (We see this echoed in God’s instruction to the church in 1 Timothy 2:11: “LET a woman learn…”) It hadn’t slipped Jesus’ mind that she was sitting there. He could have told her to leave, but He had no intention of doing so. Jesus wanted Mary there. He wanted to teach her and to have her learn God’s word from Him.

Next, when someone tried to take Mary away from hearing and being trained in God’s word, Jesus – God Himself – answered with a resounding NO. This “will not be taken away from her,” Jesus said. Mary, and Martha too (41), could arrange centerpieces or turn a cookie into a work of art any time or never. But this, the teaching of God’s word, was urgent. Vital. Jesus didn’t want either of them to miss it by focusing on the trivial things they thought they should be pursuing.

And He doesn’t want us to miss it either, ladies.

Jesus pulled women out of the craft room and into the study. Is the women’s ministry at your church trying to pull them back?

Is the women’s events page on your church’s web site filled exclusively with painting parties, fashion shows, ladies’ teas, and scrapbook sessions?

Does your women’s ministry do canned “Bible” studies authored by women who offer nothing but personal stories, experiences, and false doctrine?

Are the Marys in your church who want to sit at the feet of Jesus and hear His word rightly handled and taught being scolded by the Marthas for not staying in their place and embracing the banality the women’s ministry is doling out?

Is this it? Is this all women are good for in the church- fluff and false doctrine?

Jesus didn’t think so.

Let’s have our women’s ministries train women in the full scope of biblical womanhood. Let’s be serious students of God’s word by picking it up and studying it like mature women. Let’s get equipped to teach and disciple other women who are babes in Christ. Let’s share the gospel with the lost. Let’s learn how to train our own children in the Scriptures and be the ones to raise the bar for what the kids at our church are being taught. Let’s roll up our sleeves and get our hands dirty ministering to those who are ill, in prison, lonely, poor, elderly, considering abortion, experiencing crisis; who have wayward children, problems in their marriages, a parent with Alzheimer’s, or have lost a loved one.

Women are worth more and capable of more than the bill of goods they’re being sold by “Christian” retailers suggests. More than cutesy crafts and fairytales masquerading as biblical teaching. Let’s put the “ministry” – ministry of the Word and ministry to others – back in “women’s ministry.”

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Providentially Hindered: Is Your Church Taking Care of Caretakers?

09 Friday Sep 2016

Posted by Michelle Lesley in Ministry

≈ 3 Comments

Tags

Caregivers, Caretakers, Christian caregivers, Christian caretakers, Christian Women, Christians with disabilities, Disability, Disability in the church, Disability Ministry, Families with disabilities, Family members with disabilities, Ministering to the disabled, Primary caregiver, Respite, Respite Care

solitude-1209296_1280

“I desperately want to go to church, but I take care of my elderly mother who has Alzheimer’s. I can’t take her with me, I can’t leave her alone, and I can’t afford someone to sit with her while I’m at church.”

“We’d love to be faithful church members, but our child has a disability that makes him extremely sensitive to the light and sound stimuli in the worship service and he becomes uncomfortable and disruptive. Attending church is rarely an option for us.”

“I’m the sole caretaker of my husband who is a quadriplegic. It takes several hours to get him up, dressed, and ready in the morning. We’ve tried, but there’s no way we can make it to the 9:00 a.m. service of the only doctrinally sound church near us, and no other service times are offered.”

These are just a sampling of the stories I’ve heard from readers recently as I’ve written about the importance of church membership and attendance. The Bible is clear that we’re to be faithful members of a local body of believers. The entire New Testament assumes that Christians need to meet together to worship, pray, encourage and exhort each other, study and hear the preaching of God’s word, celebrate the ordinances of baptism and the Lord’s Supper, and serve one another. “Lone Ranger Christians” don’t exist in the New Testament. Neither do Christians who are perfectly able to attend church, but choose to skip it in favor of sleeping in, kids’ soccer games, birthday parties, frequent travel, shopping, and other non-essential activities. We aren’t to place such a low value on meeting together that we attend church only if it happens to fit into our busy schedules; we arrange our busy schedules around being faithful, active members of a local church. Yes, Scripture insists, it’s that important.

When I was a child, there was still the notion among Christians that you were to attend church unless “Providentially hindered,” meaning that God, in His providence and sovereignty placed you in a situation that made it impossible for you to go to church that day- illness, death, unavoidable imperative travel, an emergency.

But what about people who are Providentially hindered from attending church week after week – maybe for years on end, maybe even for the rest of their lives – because they’re taking care of somebody else who’s Providentially hindered by illness or disability from attending church? How are these precious brothers and sisters who are honoring their parents or laying down their lives for their children not only to obey the Scriptural admonition to meet together, but also to receive the encouragement, edification, and spiritual nourishment they desperately need and want?

It takes two, baby. Both the caretaker and the church itself bear some responsibility here.

The caretaker needs to make sure she’s put in the effort to explore all possibilities of physically attending a doctrinally sound church or meeting of believers before concluding that she can’t. Her first priority is to pray fervently that God will provide a way. God honors the prayers of believers who are looking for ways to be obedient to Him. The caretaker might have to make some sacrifices of time, money, convenience, or preferences, but God can and will make a way.

Most of the caretakers I’ve heard from are praying. They have made the effort. And that’s where the local church comes in.

It is to our shame (and I include myself in this obliviousness) that local churches often don’t even think about what it’s like to be a caretaker. To long to simply attend church for worship, fellowship, and refreshing of soul, only to realize it’s the impossible dream. Christian caretakers are often out of sight, and, thus, out of mind, but they are not out of God’s heart, His mindfulness, or His family, and we need to be ministering to them.

How? It’s a great question, and I don’t have all the answers because each situation is unique. But guess who can answer that question? God, and the caretakers your church needs to minister to.

Pray:

Does your church have a heart to reach out to caretakers, but isn’t quite sure how to go about it? Pray. Ask God for the wisdom to find caretakers who need to be ministered to and to know how best to meet their needs for fellowship and worship.

Find Them:

Go to your pastor or church secretary and ask for the names of families who are already on your church roll or who are in some way connected to your church, and start with them. Ask friends and family members for names of caretakers your church can minister to. Go to your local agencies, hospitals, organizations, schools, businesses, and other entities that provide services to people with disabilities or chronic illnesses and let them know your church wants to reach out to caretakers.

Ask Them:

Contact caretakers and ask them how your church can meet their needs both inside and outside the church. Caretakers often feel invisible to the church. They need to know Christ loves them- that they matter to Him. We can demonstrate His love by coming alongside them and making a sacrificial effort to help. And, who knows? It might be simpler than you think.

Think Outside the Box:

Put yourself in the caretaker’s shoes. What could be a creative solution to helping her attend church while still tending to her loved one? Just a few ideas…

Sitter rotation– The caretaker in the first scenario of this article could attend worship if just a handful of church members would volunteer to come over to her house and sit with her mother during church on a rotating basis. It wouldn’t even cost anything.

Transportation– Maybe the caretaker’s loved one uses a wheelchair and could attend church with her, but she doesn’t have access to wheelchair accessible transportation on Sundays. Could your church borrow or rent a van and set that up for her?

Special classes– We already provide things like nurseries and children’s church for babies and small children. What about a similar concept for ill or disabled people of any age?

Home church– Perhaps there are a few families with disabled loved ones who would like to meet together for worship in one of their homes. Could the church send a pastor or elder to lead and teach them?

Home groups– Does your church do home groups? Could one of them meet in the caretaker’s home and bring church to her?

Medical needs– Could a caretaker bring her loved one to church if there were medical help available should the need arise? Perhaps a church member who’s a doctor or nurse would agree to be “on call” if needed while the family is at church.

Service times– The caretaker in the third scenario would be helped by the church simply pushing back its service time an hour or so. Could your church adjust its Sunday morning worship time or offer additional services, Bible studies, or small groups on Sunday evenings, on Saturdays, or on a week night?

Accommodations– Could your church make structural changes such as installing wheelchair ramps, elevators, modified seating, or other adjustments to the physical property that would make it possible for the caretaker’s loved one to attend with her? What about turning off the strobe lights and turning down the volume of the sound system for those sensitive to these stimuli? If the caretaker’s main concern is the distraction (noises, etc.) her loved one might create, would it be possible to simply educate the church body about the disability and train them to make loving allowance for these distractions during the worship service?

In home help– Perhaps it would be helpful to the caretaker for a church member to volunteer to come to the caretaker’s home and help get the disabled person ready for church on Sunday mornings while the caretaker gets herself ready.

Professional help– Are there members of your church who are special education teachers, doctors, nurses, home health care aides, contractors? Enlist their help for suggestions on how to make your church accessible to the ill and disabled and how to help caretakers both at home and inside the church.

The spiritual needs of caretakers have been overlooked by the church for far too long. Thanks to technology, transportation, and other modern conveniences God has blessed us with, it has never been easier to reach out to caretakers and meet their needs. Are you looking for a place of service in the church? Maybe you’e been a caretaker and are all too familiar with ways the church failed to help you? Reaching out to meet the needs of caretakers is a ministry that’s practically tailor made for godly, nurturing women, especially since the majority of caretakers are also women. Could God be calling you to help bridge the gap between caretakers and the church?


Additional Resources:

Want more suggestions? Check out how these churches and ministries are assisting caretakers and their loved ones, and if you have a helpful idea or link, or if your church offers a ministry to caretakers, please share it in the comments below. Another reader could be looking for your church, resource, or idea!

Respite Changes Everything– Does your church have the resources to “go big” in ministry to families with disabled children both inside and outside the church? Could you partner with Jill’s House and import their respite services to your area? Could you replicate their services at a level your church could fund and staff? Check out this amazing ministry. No doubt there’s a need for it in your area.

What is the biggest mistake churches make when caring for children with special needs?

Valley Community Church, Pleasanton, California, Disability Ministry

How to Love Those Who Care for the Hurting

Six Ways Not to Forsake the Assembly

Suggestions from a reader:

My former church was a megachurch that had a great special needs kids ministry: A special classroom for children and a classroom for teens who needed more care, pairing a special kiddo with a buddy to go to the regular kids’ program, a once a month respite night.

1) The first step is to welcome the family. Caregivers are tired and can be easily discouraged. If your church only has one service, consider adding another service.

2) Be patient. You may not see them every Sunday; medical emergencies and other stuff happens. They also may not have time to volunteer or attend Bible studies. Someone from the church will have to take the initiative to contact them: a phone call, an email, a postcard are HUGE. Also, having sermons available to stream online may help the caregivers to catch up on missed sermons.

3) Offer a once a month respite night to the whole community. If you can muster the volunteers then for 2 hours a month, you can offer parents (or spouses) the chance to drop off their special kids at your church and give them a much needed break to grocery shop or take a nap. Seriously, this is a huge ministry to parents – especially single parents. Also, I have seen teenage volunteers absolutely flourish by being a buddy to a special needs child. Another great opportunity for teens and adults is to be a buddy to a special needs child for your VBS or AWANA programs as well.

4) Joni and Friends is a Christian organization that ministers to the disabled. In California where I’m from, there are regional offices that offer to host disability ministry workshops to local churches.

5) Realize that at least with special needs children it is not all sunshine and lollipops. There are behavioral, cognitive, and physical challenges. But these kids need to hear about Jesus, and their parents need to feel loved and a part of the wider church body. They need to feel they’re not alone.

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Baton Rouge Flood Relief- We Need Your Help

21 Sunday Aug 2016

Posted by Michelle Lesley in Ministry, Tragedy

≈ 1 Comment

Tags

Baton Rouge, Baton Rouge Flood Relief, Baton Rouge Flooding, Cajun Navy, Flood Donations, Flood Relief, Flood Relief Ministry, Flood Volunteers, Louisiana Flood, Louisiana Flood Relief

Regular readers: This week’s edition of The Mailbag answers the question I’ve received from several readers: “How can we help with flood relief?” I’m posting it today, Sunday, in hopes you can catch your pastor or small group at church and talk to them about sending a team or a love offering. Please share this around to help us get the word out, and thank you so much for your love and desire to help.

high-water-123201_1280Imagine 90% of the homes and businesses in your town destroyed by a flood. Thousands of your friends and neighbors rescued from rapidly rising deadly currents by boat, sometimes, literally, with only the clothes on their backs. Some separated from spouses or young children for days because they had to get into different boats and ended up at different shelters. No homes to go back to. No jobs to go back to because businesses flood just like homes do. No cars to drive because cars flood, too. No clothes, no food, and often, no money to rebuild and replace everything they owned.

Now try to imagine, in the aftermath, having to choose whether to scramble to clean out your own flood ravaged house before it molds and mildews or helping a loved one who desperately needs you. Or, if your home didn’t flood, feeling torn between helping your family, your best friend, your church, and other relief ministries.

This is the situation my community, and communities across south Louisiana, are facing right now. Those of us whose homes and businesses God spared are doing what we can to help friends, loved ones, and strangers, but we are spread dreadfully thin. Shelters and relief ministries are in desperate need of food, supplies, and volunteers.

In Louisiana, we take great pride in taking care of our own, and our locals are doing an astounding job of it. But the situation is so overwhelming that this time we need help.

We need your help. We need your church’s help.

How? Could you spare a few days or more to come down and volunteer with a flood relief ministry? Could your church send a team? Would you like to make a donation, or could your church collect a love offering, to help the many people whose lives have been turned upside down by the flood?

If so, I’d like to direct you to the relief efforts at New Covenant Church. New Covenant is about 15 minutes from me in Denham Springs, Louisiana, one of the hardest hit areas. Blessedly, God spared this precious church to be a ministry to others during this difficult time.

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New Covenant is a doctrinally sound local church where several friends and loved ones of mine, including the associate pastor (who is heading up flood relief efforts there), are members. My family and I have worshiped with New Covenant numerous times. If you or your church would like to help by making a donation, I can personally assure you that your money will be handled in a godly way and will go directly to flood victims who will also hear the biblical gospel. New Covenant needs volunteers for various aspects of relief ministry, too, and would welcome you or a group from your church if you are able to come down here and help out.

You can give on line or via text. And, if you’d like to come down and help out, you can contact Pastor Todd Whirley by phone or e-mail, or (possibly more quickly- phone service is still somewhat spotty) by private message on Facebook or Twitter.

Thank you so much for your kindness, prayers, compassion, and generosity, and please share this with your friends and on social media to help us get the word out.
Same street as the one in the video above.

Same street as the one in the video above.

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Throwback Thursday ~ 7 Ways to Encourage Your Minister of Music

12 Thursday May 2016

Posted by Michelle Lesley in Ministry, Throwback Thursday

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

Choir, Church, Church Music, Church Musicians, Clergy Appreciation, Encourage, Encouragement, Minister of Music, Ministry, Music Ministry, Pastor Appreciation, Praise Team, Sing, Worship, Worship leader, Worship Team

Originally published November 18, 2014

7 encourage MoM

Numerous articles have been written about how you, as a church member, can be an encouragement to your pastor- how you can constructively praise his sermon, pray for him, get him a great gift for Pastor Appreciation Month, etc. These are good things. Please be sure to support your pastor. Being a pastor is one of the toughest and most thankless jobs out there, and if you’ve read the statistics you know pastors need and deserve all the encouragement they can get.

But the pastor isn’t the only person on your church’s staff who needs your support. So does your minister of music. And, having been married to one for over twenty years, I can tell you there aren’t many articles out there letting you know how church members can encourage their ministers of music. Ready to show some love? Here are seven ways you can be an encouragement to your minister of music.

1. Make practice a priority.

Before you join the choir or praise team or volunteer to play an instrument, find out how much of a time commitment it will be, and consider whether or not you can diligently keep that commitment. Once you’ve joined or volunteered, attend rehearsals, worship services, and performances faithfully, and be sure to arrive on time. You have no idea how much it means to your minister of music that he can count on you.

2. Get to the church on time.

Think about how you would feel if you planned a dinner party, worked hard all week cooking and cleaning, and then one of the couples you invited carelessly showed up halfway through the meal. You’d probably think that was kind of rude and feel somewhat discouraged. That’s sort of the way a minister of music can feel when people (especially the same people every week) habitually arrive late to church for non-emergency reasons. Not only that, but it’s a distraction to others when you come in late, plus you’re missing out on praising God and getting your heart prepared to receive His word during the sermon. Being on time and ready for worship benefits everybody!

3. Sing.

If you were in a meeting at work or in a college class, would you pick up your knitting, clip your nails, walk around the room chatting with friends, or bury your nose in your phone the whole time? Probably not, yet, over the years I have seen church members do all these and more during the music portion of the worship service. It’s disrespectful to the God we’re supposed to be worshiping and to the minister of music who is trying to do the work God has called him to. On the other hand, I love it when we get in the car after church and my husband says, with a smile on his face, “Wow, they were really singing today!” We have an incredible Savior who has given us the privilege of praising Him, so let’s take Him up on it. Sing out! You can worship and be an encourager all at the same time.

4. Smile!

It’s pretty disheartening for a minister of music to stand up front, giving it all he’s got, and then look out over the congregation and see a bunch of people looking like they’d rather be at the dentist. Think about Who you’re singing to and all the reasons why you’re singing to Him, and I challenge you to keep a frown on your face! Just the simple act of smiling while you’re singing will do wonders for your minister of music (and for you!).

5. Think before you complain.

Has your minister of music said or done something that’s clearly a sin or false doctrine? If so, you have a biblical obligation  to go to him -kindly and in love- and talk to him about it directly.

Is your complaint a matter of personal preference- style of music, whether or not he wears a tie, etc.? Give it 24 hours. Does it still seem just as important? Could you possibly be a servant to him (and others in the congregation whose opinion is the opposite of yours) by overlooking an offense and not complaining?

If you do feel the need to voice your concern (and there are valid concerns that aren’t sin-related), approach your minister of music the way you would want to be approached. Instead of, “Turn that dadgum volume DOWN!” how about, “I was wondering if it would be possible to ask the sound tech to lower the volume in the house speakers a little? My baby’s ears are very sensitive and she gets fussy when it’s that loud. I hate missing worship when I have to take her out to the lobby.” Instead of, “Hymns are so boring. I don’t see why we have to sing them half the time,” how about, “I really loved those two worship songs we sang this morning! Do you think we might be able to sing more songs like that soon?” Christ wants us to be kind to one another, so show your minister of music a little “Golden Rule” love.

6. Speak encouraging words often.

It’s been our experience, and seems to be the general consensus among ministers of music, that the most common kind of feedback they get is negative feedback. People are much quicker to complain than affirm. Buck the trend. Did he choose one of your favorite songs for the service? Did a certain song help you to understand one of God’s attributes better? Did the choir do a nice job on their anthem? Are you praying for him? Tell him. He appreciates it more than you know.

7. Show tangible appreciation.

It is amazing what even the smallest gift can do to lift my husband’s spirits. A card of appreciation (I have come across cards that he has saved for years), something related to one of his hobbies, a church member buying him lunch at a fast food place. They might be small items monetarily speaking, but their message is, “I care about you, and I appreciate your hard work.” And that’s priceless.

 

We have been blessed over the last two decades to serve at several churches that had members who were very good at encouraging their minister of music. Their love and support made my husband’s ministry a joy. What are some ways you can think of to encourage the minister of music at your church and spread that same kind of joy?


THIS ARTICLE WAS ORIGINALLY PUBLISHED AT SATISFACTION THROUGH CHRIST.

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Mary and Martha and Jesus and Women’s Ministry

11 Friday Mar 2016

Posted by Michelle Lesley in Christian women, Ministry

≈ 8 Comments

Tags

Bible Study, Biblical Womanhood, Christian Women, Church, Jesus, Ladies Bible Study, Mary and Martha, Women's Bible Study, Womens Ministry

mary martha jesus womens ministry

You remember the story. Jesus comes to Mary and Martha’s house. Martha’s Pinteresting up the place while Mary sits at Jesus’ feet to listen to Him teach. Martha gripes to Jesus that Mary should help her and Jesus says no because it’s better for her to listen to Him than fold napkins into the shape of swans or whatever. Moral of the story- Martha needs to relax and not let other things distract her from Jesus.

That’s a good, true, and important takeaway from this passage, and one that we would all do well to heed.

But did you ever stop to think that Mary and Martha aren’t the main characters in this story? Jesus is. Jesus is the main character in every Bible story, so our primary focus should always be on Him: what He said and did and was like.

What was Jesus teaching that day at Mary and Martha’s house? The passage doesn’t tell us the topic He was speaking about, but we are privy to a very important lesson He imparted through the scenario with Mary and Martha. A lesson about the way God loves and values women.

Remember how women were generally regarded at that time? They didn’t have much more value than livestock, furniture, or a man’s other possessions. They were considered intellectually inferior, they weren’t formally educated, and their legal and social standing were often tenuous at best. They could not go beyond the Court of the Women at the temple for worship. There was even a traditional prayer Jewish men recited in which they thanked God for not making them a woman, a Gentile, or a slave. Women were low man on the totem pole, so to speak.

And that’s where we find Martha. She wasn’t doing anything wrong that day. In fact, in her culture, she was doing everything right. If anything, Mary would have been the one viewed as being in the wrong because the teaching was for the men, and it was the women’s job to bustle around taking care of all the hospitality duties. Martha knew this. Mary knew this. Jesus knew this. Everyone else present knew this. Martha must have wondered why someone hadn’t yet shooed Mary out of the living room and into the kitchen. So her statement to Jesus in verse 40, “Lord, do you not care that my sister has left me to serve alone? Tell her then to help me,” was probably not just, “I need another pair of hands,” but also a bit of, “Mary is forgetting her place. This isn’t what proper women do.”

Oh yes it is.

Whatever else He might have been lecturing about that day, that was one of the lessons Jesus taught Mary, Martha, the rest of their guests, and Christendom at large.

Women aren’t second class citizens in the Kingdom of God. We are precious and valuable to Him. He has important, worthwhile work for us to do – His way – in the body of Christ. And He wants us trained in His word in order to carry out that work.

How did Jesus teach that lesson?

First, He allowed Mary to stay and receive His teaching (39). (We see this echoed in God’s instruction to the church in 1 Timothy 2:11: “LET a woman learn…”) It hadn’t slipped Jesus’ mind that she was sitting there. He could have told her to leave, but He had no intention of doing so. Jesus wanted Mary there. He wanted to teach her and to have her learn God’s word from Him.

Next, when someone tried to take Mary away from hearing and being trained in God’s word, Jesus – God Himself – answered with a resounding NO. This “will not be taken away from her,” Jesus said. Mary, and Martha too (41), could arrange centerpieces or turn a cookie into a work of art any time or never. But this, the teaching of God’s word, was urgent. Vital. Jesus didn’t want either of them to miss it by focusing on the trivial things they thought they should be pursuing.

And He doesn’t want us to miss it either, ladies.

Jesus pulled women out of the craft room and into the study. Is the women’s ministry at your church trying to pull them back?

Is the women’s events page on your church’s web site filled exclusively with painting parties, fashion shows, ladies’ teas, and scrapbook sessions?

Does your women’s ministry do canned “Bible” studies authored by women who offer nothing but personal stories, experiences, and false doctrine?

Are the Marys in your church who want to sit at the feet of Jesus and hear His word rightly handled and taught being scolded by the Marthas for not staying in their place and embracing the banality the women’s ministry is doling out?

Is this it? Is this all women are good for in the church- fluff and false doctrine?

Jesus didn’t think so.

Let’s have our women’s ministries train women in the full scope of biblical womanhood. Let’s be serious students of God’s word by picking it up and studying it like mature women. Let’s get equipped to teach and disciple other women who are babes in Christ. Let’s share the gospel with the lost. Let’s learn how to train our own children in the Scriptures and be the ones to raise the bar for what the kids at our church are being taught. Let’s roll up our sleeves and get our hands dirty ministering to those who are ill, in prison, lonely, poor, elderly, considering abortion, experiencing crisis; who have wayward children, problems in their marriages, a parent with Alzheimer’s, or have lost a loved one.

Women are worth more and capable of more than the bill of goods they’re being sold by “Christian” retailers suggests. More than cutesy crafts and fairytales masquerading as biblical teaching. Let’s put the “ministry” – ministry of the Word and ministry to others – back in “women’s ministry.”

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Throwback Thursday ~ Real Ministers of Music’s Wives of Anychurch, U.S.A. ~ Part 2

30 Thursday Jul 2015

Posted by Michelle Lesley in Ministry, Throwback Thursday, Worship

≈ 4 Comments

Tags

CCM, Clergy Appreciation Month, Contemporary Worship, Corporate Worship, Hymns, KLOVE, Minister of Music, Ministry Wife, Pastors, Pianist, Traditional Worship, Worship, Worship leader, Worship Wars

Originally published April 10, 2014diverse-group-of-women

I’ve been married to a minister of music for over 20 years. My husband has served at many different churches in a variety of capacities: on staff, interim, supply, revivals, conferences, retreats, etc. Over those 20+ years and in those various capacities, I’ve observed a number of things about him, pastors, church musicians, and congregations from a unique vantage point.

Now, with a little help and a lot of input from a few sister minister of music’s wives, it’s true confessions time. Time for us to tell all, here in Part 2 of Real Ministers of Music’s Wives of Anychurch, U.S.A. 

You can read Part 1 here.

Turn Your Radio On, and Listen to the Music in The Air
The minister of music understands that there are songs we love to sing along with on KLOVE or Pandora that we’d also like to sing in church, and, in a lot of cases, he’d probably like to, too. There are a variety of reasons why the songs we like might not get sung in church:

  •  It’s a solo. Most of the songs we hear on the radio (especially contemporary ones) are written and performed as solos, and don’t work for congregational singing because: the timing is difficult for a large group to follow, there are too many spontaneous riffs and change ups, there are complicated and/or numerous bridges and tags that are difficult for large groups to follow, etc. Not every song works for large group singing.
  • tube-radio-67772_640 The lyrics contain faulty or watered down theology. The minister of music’s job is to lead us in worship. We can’t worship if we’re singing something that conflicts with God’s word or doesn’t focus on Him and His nature, character, and deeds.
  • The accompanists aren’t comfortable with it. A lot of the songs people want to sing in the worship service can be difficult for pianists and other instrumentalists whose main experience is in other genres of music. While every musician should strive to improve his skills, the minister of music doesn’t want to put his accompanists on the spot if they’re uncomfortable with the technical requirements of the music.
  • Your minister of music isn’t comfortable with it. If the minister of music is in his 60’s he may not feel he can carry off a top ten CCM song made popular by somebody in his 20’s, especially if he doesn’t have a worship band equal to the one we’re used to hearing on the radio.
  • There’s no sheet music available. Or it’s not available in the right key or for the right instruments, etc.
  • It’s “off limits”. Occasionally, and for various reasons, the pastor, elders, or others in leadership over the minister of music will make a decision that a certain song is not to be used in the worship service. Depending on the circumstances, there may not be a diplomatic way to explain this to people who love that song and want to sing it in church.

play-piano-7626_640Play Us a Song, You’re the Piano Woman
Just by way of information, not every minister of music’s wife plays the piano. I’m one of them. Sorry. I wish I could.


One Singular Sensation
sing-201027_640
Regardless of how many pop stars got their start by singing in church, the purpose of the worship service is to worship God. There are many wonderful and talented soloists who, in humility and faithfulness, pour their hearts out to God in song at their local churches and do a great job of it. There are also a few divas on their way up the ladder looking for a stepping stone to greatness. Church isn’t American Idol. Find a karaoke bar.

Show a Little Bit of Love and Kindness
It’s always encouraging for a minister of music to hear that he Fool boy is waiting his girlfrienddid a great job with the choir or that you really worshiped this morning. It’s encouraging when a pastor mounts the platform for his sermon and says thank you, or I really liked that song, or refers back to/quotes one of the songs during his sermon. Little things like that go a long way, so offer your minister of music a word of encouragement when you can.

Also, if your church participates in clergy appreciation month (usually the month of October), please don’t forget your minister of music, youth pastor, associate pastor, etc. They all work hard to shepherd you, and it doesn’t feel good to be left out.

War- What is it Good For?
The worship wars (contemporary worship music vs. traditional hymns) are alive and well. Sometimes, rather than being a general in that war, our minister of music might just be a casualty of it.

Competition

Everybody has particular genres of music that we’re most comfortable with. When a different style comes along, it can be jarring. It can cause angst. It can cause arguments. But when we worship God, our focus is not to be on what makes us happy or comfortable. Often, we get so concerned about whether the worship at church pleases or offends us that we don’t stop to think about whether it pleases or offends God.

But that’s the main concern of the minister of music. Which songs, regardless of style, will be pleasing to the Lord and lead people into truth about Him? While he’s trying to do his best to sort this out week by week, he’s possibly being pulled in a variety of directions by a variety of people over style. How many people will leave the church if we sing more hymns than contemporary songs? How many people will stop giving in the offering if we sing more contemporary songs than hymns? Who’s going to accost me after church and complain? How will the pastor and elders react to this week’s order of service? It can be a lot of pressure and take his focus off of where it needs to be: what will be pleasing to God?

Just as one man’s trash is another man’s treasure, the songs we don’t like might just be someone else’s favorite. What if we looked at singing the songs we don’t particularly like as a way to serve and encourage our brothers and sisters in the congregation who do like those songs?

Why’s Everybody Always Pickin’ on Me?
There’s no nice, sweet way to say this, so I’m just gonna throw it out there. Church members can sometimes be mean. thI mean, mean. Let me hasten to add that most of the time, most church members are not. The majority of church members are kind, loving, supportive, and definitely appreciated by the pastor and staff. However, the others are definitely out there. I have seen church members treat pastors, ministers of music, and other church staff the way I wouldn’t treat a dog. There’s no excuse for that.

The minister of music isn’t perfect. There may be times when he does something unbiblical or hurtful and at those times, it’s necessary for the appropriate person to talk with him, under the provisos of Matthew 18, about whatever is wrong. But there are other times when people get their feathers ruffled –even though the minister of music hasn’t done anything wrong or unbiblical—simply because their personal preferences haven’t been catered to.

It’s OK to talk with our ministers of music about things, even personal preferences, but let’s do it in an encouraging and helpful way rather than a griping or attacking way. Screaming, threatening, name calling, constant complaints, and nasty anonymous notes and emails are never appropriate, and if that’s what is transpiring, then the problem is not with the minister of music it’s with the person who’s acting that way. If we know that a member of our church is acting that way towards anyone, pastor, staff, or layperson, we must intervene and be a catalyst for making things right.

God calls us to encourage one another and build each other up, so let’s get at it! Let’s try to affirm our ministers of music (and pastors and other staff!) whenever we’re able!

 

What’s something you can do
to be an encouragement to your minister of music?

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