biblical sexuality – Michelle Lesley

Previous Lessons: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10

Read These Selected Scriptures

Lesson 10 focused on our role as godly daughters. In lesson 11, we’ll be examining God’s design for women who are wives.

Questions to Consider

1. In lessons 2 and 3 (links above) we took a look at some of the attributes of a godly wife that we can emulate. Because Proverbs 31 mainly zeroes in on godly character, most of that passage easily applied to most women regardless of marital status. In today’s lesson, rather than attributes to emulate, we’ll be focusing on God’s instructions to obey for wives. Some of these instructions can also apply to unmarried women. Read over today’s passages and explain how unmarried women might apply some of these Scriptures. Why is it important for unmarried women to study passages about married women and vice versa?

2. Examine the Genesis 2 passage. What are the main points God is making about wives and marriage in this passage? What word does this passage use (18,20) to encapsulate a woman’s role in marriage? What does it mean for a woman to be a helper “fit for” or “corresponding to” her husband? Whom did God create first, man or woman? Second? Whom did God create to be the helper, man or woman? How do these two things point to and undergird male headship in marriage? Does the Genesis passage mean that all women have to marry or that the only purpose for which women were created was to be wives?

3. Look at the Ephesians and Colossians passages together. Explain how the relationship between husband and wife is a picture of the relationship between Christ and His church. Write a character sketch of a godly husband and a character sketch of a godly wife according to these passages. Why does God instruct husbands to “love” their wives, but wives to “respect” their husbands? (33) What is the difference, and why doesn’t God give the same instruction to husbands as to wives? What should motivate a wife to submit to her husband? Pretend you are discipling a newly married, newly saved woman who has never read these passages. How would you explain biblical submission to her? How is it “fitting in the Lord” (3:18) to submit to your husband?

4. Study the 1 Peter passage. In verse 1, what is the spiritual state (lost or saved?) of the wives Peter is addressing? The husbands? Imagine Peter wrote this part of his letter to answer a question he had been asked by some of the women of the church. What was the question they asked? Carefully examine the end of verse 1. Does this mean a wife should never share the gospel with her unsaved husband and that he can be saved simply by watching her good behavior? What does it mean? How is biblical submission an aspect of holiness? (5) Some women believe they only have to submit to their husbands if their husbands are saved or if their husbands are acting in a godly way. How does this passage answer that misconception?

What does “adorning” (3-4) mean? Why and how do women usually adorn themselves? How are godly women to adorn themselves? For whom? Why? Explain external adorning versus internal adorning. Which do you think is more winsome to your husband? Compare 3-4 with 1 Samuel 16:1-13. Which is more important to God, the external or internal? Why?

Explain what it means to have a “gentle and quiet spirit“. (4) Can a woman with an outgoing, vivacious personality still have a gentle and quiet spirit? How? How is your spirit different from your personality? How should a godly spirit inform a godly personality? Explain why a gentle and quiet spirit is beautiful and how that beauty is imperishable. Why is a gentle and quiet spirit precious in God’s sight?

5. Make a list, in your own words, of God’s instructions about a husband’s and wife’s sexual relationship found in the 1 Corinthians 7 passage. God considered these instructions important enough to include in the Bible. Why? How is the marriage bed a protection against sexual temptation and sin? (2) How does this passage teach and emphasize the mutuality of the sexual relationship? Is this mutuality limited to the bedroom, or does it extend to other aspects of marriage? Explain the terms “rights” (3) and “authority” (4) in the context of this passage. In our culture, we most often think of sex in terms of pleasure or recreation. Is pleasure or recreation the main concern of this passage? What adjective would you choose to describe the perspective of this passage toward sex?

Homework

Consider the concepts each of today’s passages addresses: the husband’s headship, the wife’s role as helper, respecting your husband, submitting to your husband, your marriage imaging the relationship between Christ and the church, witnessing to an unsaved husband, external adornment vs. internal adornment, the sexual relationship, etc. Pinpoint one aspect you need growth in. Repent of any sin in this area, and spend the next week praying that God will grow you to more Christlikeness in this area. You may even wish to memorize and meditate on a verse you found particularly helpful.

Suggested Memory Verse

Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear— but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious.
1 Peter 3:3-4

Previous Lessons: 1, 2

(By way of reminder, this study will be slightly different from our regular studies. We will be taking a more in depth look at the passages of Genesis that focus on the women we’ll be studying and a more generalized overview of the passages in between. Those “in between” passages may be somewhat lengthy, so instead of reprinting them here, I will be linking to those longer passages on Bible Gateway. Simply click on “Read Genesis X:Y-Z” to start reading.)

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Read Genesis 1:26-2:25

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Questions to Consider

1. You may wish to review Lesson 2 (link above) in preparation for today’s lesson.

2. Examine 1:26-30. What sets human beings apart from the rest of creation? What does it mean to be made in the “image” and “likeness” of God? What responsibilities and instructions did God give Adam and Eve when He created them?

3. What did God mean when He said that man was to “have dominion” (26,28) over the animals and “subdue” the earth (28)? Does God consider animals to be equal to people? How does man’s dominion over the earth reflect and point to God’s dominion over the universe? What are some ways Christians can glorify God as we exercise dominion over creation?

4. What did God instruct Adam and Eve to eat? (29) What were animals to eat? (30) Why do you think God needed to tell Adam and Eve what they and the animals were to eat? Why, at that time in history, did people and animals not eat meat? (Hint: 2:17c- In order to get meat, what do you have to do to another living creature?) Does this instruction still apply today?

5. Study 1:31-2:3. Did God create anything else after He created Adam and Eve? Why did God rest after creating humans?

6. Describe the ecology and horticulture of the earth (2:5-6) and of Eden (2:8-14).

7. Compare the method God used for creating Adam (2:7) to the method He used for creating Eve (2:21-22). What are the differences and similarities? God made man to tend (2:15) the ______ from which he had come (2:7). God made woman to tend (2:18) the ______ from which she had come (2:22).

8. In Genesis 1 (4,10,12,18,21,25,31) God brings each of His creative acts to completion with the statement, “And God saw that it was good.” What is the first thing in Creation that God said was not good? (2:18)

9. Examine 2:18-20. Describe the void in both Adam’s life and in Creation prior to God’s creation of Eve. How did the creation of woman make Adam’s life, and Creation, whole and complete?

10. What was Adam’s job? (2:15,19) What was Eve’s job? (2:18,20)

11. What can we learn about God’s design for gender, sexuality, and marriage from Genesis 1:27-28 and 2:18,20-25?

12. Describe Eve and her world, using today’s passage as your guide. What kinds of things did she see, smell, hear, taste, and feel? What are some of the things she and Adam might have spent their days doing? What did she eat? What did she wear? How would the fact that sin and death had not yet entered the world have affected her daily life, her relationship with Adam, and her relationship with God? How would your daily life, relationships with others, and your relationship with God be different if sin and death had never entered the world?

Homework

As we learned in Lesson 2, Genesis 1:26-30 and 2:5-25 are not two different accounts of the creation of man. Rather, chapter 1 is the condensed version and chapter 2 is the expanded version. Sometimes when we’re studying historical events like this, it can be confusing to our linear way of thinking when the story is not laid out in chronological order.

On a piece of paper or in your word processor, rearrange the verses of Genesis 1:26-2:25 into chronological order.