Homosexuality, Mailbag

The Mailbag: Should Christians Attend a Homosexual “Wedding”?


“Should a Christian attend the wedding of a homosexual friend or loved one?”

No, Christians should not attend homosexual weddings.

Attending a wedding tacitly says that you are in favor of the union, and no matter how much you love the person, Christ calls us to love Him more and not participate in or give approval to sin.

Often, the reason Christians will give for feeling they should attend a same sex wedding is that they are afraid declining to attend will cause the couple to cut off the relationship with them, closing the door to any future opportunity to share the gospel.

But if you’re close enough to the couple to be invited to the wedding, shouldn’t you have already shared the gospel with them? Do you not trust that God can save someone, either immediately or in the future, from one instance of sharing the gospel? This person’s salvation does not rest on your shoulders. It can only be accomplished by the Holy Spirit, and only in His timing.

And whether you have or haven’t yet shared the gospel with the couple, what could your attendance at the wedding accomplish other than creating confusion? How can you support their “marriage” by attending the wedding and then turn around later and tell them they need to repent of this sin?

Additionally, attending the wedding sends the message to your children, family, church, friends, co-workers and others that you approve of the sin of homosexuality. We all have people watching us to see whether we stand with Christ or with the world. It’s imperative that we set a godly example.

Yes, if you decline to attend the wedding, you might lose your relationship with that homosexual friend or loved one. But Christ calls us to separate ourselves from the world and be loyal to Him even if it costs us everything- including those we love the most:

Whoever loves father or mother more than me is not worthy of me, and whoever loves son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me.

Matthew 10:37

Regardless of your motives for attending, it appears to others and to the same sex couple as though you approve of their sin.

The gospel divides. And Christians are always called to stand on Christ’s side of the divide. We do not celebrate the sins that nailed Christ to the cross.

Christians should not be helping people celebrate their sin. That is what lost people do. We should be sharing the gospel with them so they can get saved out of their sin.

And speaking of lost people who celebrate the sins of others, Romans 1:32 says:

Though they know God’s righteous decree that those who practice such things deserve to die, they not only do them but give approval to those who practice them.

If it is an abomination to God for sinners to give approval to the sins of others, how much more abominable is it in His sight for Christians to give approval to the sins of others?

Additional Resources:

Basic Training: Homosexuality, Gender Identity, and Other Sexual Immorality

Should I attend the wedding of a gay friend or family member? by Denny Burk

Should Christians Attend Gay Weddings? Does It Matter Whether They’re Religious or Secular? by Randy Alcorn and Kevin DeYoung

Christmas Dinner with the Sexual Sinner at A Word Fitly Spoken

Pride, Pronouns, and Prodigals at A Word Fitly Spoken

If you have a question about: a Bible passage, an aspect of theology, a current issue in Christianity, or how to biblically handle a family, life, or church situation, comment below (I’ll hold all questions in queue {unpublished} for a future edition of The Mailbag) or send me an e-mail or private message. If your question is chosen for publication, your anonymity will be protected.

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