biblical sexuality – Michelle Lesley

The Mailbag: Perversion-palooza Potpourri

May 27, 2025May 25, 2025 Michelle Lesley

Originally published June 4, 2024

Welcome to another “potpourri” edition of The Mailbag, where I give short(er) answers to several questions rather than a long answer to one question.

I like to take the opportunity in these potpourri editions to let new readers know about my comments/e-mail/messages policy. I’m not able to respond individually to most e-mails and messages, so here are some helpful hints for getting your questions answered more quickly. Remember, the search bar (at the very bottom of each page) can be a helpful tool!

Or maybe I answered your question already? Check out my article The Mailbag: Top 10 FAQs to see if your question has been answered and to get some helpful resources.

It’s June, and you know what that means: perversion-palooza [aka “Pride”] month. What does the Bible say about these and other issues of sexual immorality? How should your church be addressing them? What can you say if a loved one lives in this kind of sin or has been victimized by it? Here’s a roundup of Mailbag articles and other resources that may help.

Can you give me a basic overview of what the Bible says about sexuality and sexual immorality?

Basic Training: Homosexuality, Gender Identity, and Other Sexual Immorality

Christmas Dinner with the Sexual Sinner at A Word Fitly Spoken

Unashamed: Standing Firm on a Biblical Sexual Ethic at A Word Fitly Spoken

Any resources for offering a biblical apologetic against homosexuality?

Movie Tuesday: Audacity

Is it possible to be a “gay Christian”?

The Hole in World Vision’s Gospel

An Apology, A Request for Forgiveness, and Some Clarifications

Pride, Pronouns & Prodigals at A Word Fitly Spoken

Does God love homosexuals?

God Loves Gays

How can Christians best show homosexuals the love of Christ?

Cancer: A Love Story

Can you give me some general principles and Scriptures for relating to friends and loved ones who live a lifestyle of sexual immorality?

Christmas Dinner with the Sexual Sinner at A Word Fitly Spoken

Pride, Pronouns & Prodigals at A Word Fitly Spoken

How does the legalization of same sex “marriage” impact homosexuals and Christians?

SCOTUS to Rule on Same Sex “Marriage”: A Call to Prayer and Godly Response

Should Christians attend a homosexual (or “trans”) “wedding” as a guest?

The Mailbag: Should Christians Attend A Homosexual Wedding?

Pride, Pronouns & Prodigals at A Word Fitly Spoken

Talk Back: Alistair Begg at A Word Fitly Spoken

Should a Christian employee work at a homosexual “wedding”?

The Mailbag: Potpourri (Spanking, Women teaching men, Working a homosexual “wedding”…) (section 4)

How can Christians navigate Gay Pride Month?

Glad you Asked: Pride, Parenting, Evangelism and Denying Self at A Word Fitly Spoken

A friend or relative wants me to use an opposite sex name and pronouns for him (or her). Is that biblical?

The Mailbag: What’s In a Name?

Pride, Pronouns & Prodigals at A Word Fitly Spoken

I suspect someone has surgically altered her body to appear to be the opposite sex.

The Mailbag: Lady looks like a dude?

Should a man who presents himself as a woman be allowed to attend women’s events at church?

The Mailbag: Guess who’s coming to (the women’s ministry) dinner?

How should we handle church roles when it comes to medically intersex people?

The Mailbag: Church Roles and Ambiguous Anatomy

Can you point me to some biblical resources on pornography?

Biblical Resources on Pornography

My husband wants me to watch porn with him to spice up our sex life. Should I?

The Mailbag: Should Christian Couples Watch Pornography Together?

I’m including these resources on sexual abuse in this article because the abuse itself is a perversion of biblical sexuality and because the sexual sins addressed above can lead to abuse. If you were victimized by an abuser, you are not guilty of perversion, an act of perversion was committed against you.

What are some practical ways to prevent sexual abuse at my church?

Preventative Measures: 6 Steps SBC Churches Can Take to Prevent Sexual Abuse (Most of this applies to any church)

I know a woman who is a victim of sexual abuse. How can I help her biblically? (If the victim is a man, much of this still applies, but refer him to your pastor so a godly man can help and disciple him.)

From Victimhood to Victory: Biblically Helping Abused Women Heal

Band-Aids vs. Chemotherapy: Why Suffering Women are Drawn to False Doctrine and 7 Things We Can do to Help.

4 Ways Christian Advocates for Victims of Abuse Need to Get Biblically Back on Track

My husband and I are having sexual problems that stem from the fact that I was molested as a child. What should I do?

The Mailbag: Potpourri (Sexual abuse, Feminism, Serpent seed doctrine…) 3rd section

If you have a question about: a Bible passage, an aspect of theology, a current issue in Christianity, or how to biblically handle a family, life, or church situation, comment below (I’ll hold all questions in queue {unpublished} for a future edition of The Mailbag) or send me an e-mail or private message. If your question is chosen for publication, your anonymity will be protected.

Abuse, Homosexuality, Mailbag, Sin

The Mailbag: Perversion-palooza Potpourri

June 4, 2024May 17, 2024 Michelle Lesley

Welcome to another “potpourri” edition of The Mailbag, where I give short(er) answers to several questions rather than a long answer to one question.

Or maybe I answered your question already? Check out my article The Mailbag: Top 10 FAQs to see if your question has been answered and to get some helpful resources.

It’s June, and you know what that means: perversion-palooza [aka “Pride”] month. What does the Bible say about these and other issues of sexual immorality? How should your church be addressing them? What can you say if a loved one lives in this kind of sin or has been victimized by it? Here’s a roundup of Mailbag articles and other resources that may help.

Can you give me a basic overview of what the Bible says about sexuality and sexual immorality?

Basic Training: Homosexuality, Gender Identity, and Other Sexual Immorality

Christmas Dinner with the Sexual Sinner at A Word Fitly Spoken

Any resources for offering a biblical apologetic against homosexuality?

Movie Tuesday: Audacity

Is it possible to be a “gay Christian”?

The Hole in World Vision’s Gospel

An Apology, A Request for Forgiveness, and Some Clarifications

Pride, Pronouns & Prodigals at A Word Fitly Spoken

Does God love homosexuals?

God Loves Gays

How can Christians best show homosexuals the love of Christ?

Cancer: A Love Story

Can you give me some general principles and Scriptures for relating to friends and loved ones who live a lifestyle of sexual immorality?

Christmas Dinner with the Sexual Sinner at A Word Fitly Spoken

Pride, Pronouns & Prodigals at A Word Fitly Spoken

How does the legalization of same sex “marriage” impact homosexuals and Christians?

SCOTUS to Rule on Same Sex “Marriage”: A Call to Prayer and Godly Response

Should Christians attend a homosexual (or “trans”) “wedding” as a guest?

The Mailbag: Should Christians Attend A Homosexual Wedding?

Pride, Pronouns & Prodigals at A Word Fitly Spoken

Talk Back: Alistair Begg at A Word Fitly Spoken

Should a Christian employee work at a homosexual “wedding”?

The Mailbag: Potpourri (Spanking, Women teaching men, Working a homosexual “wedding”…) (section 4)

How can Christians navigate Gay Pride Month?

Glad you Asked: Pride, Parenting, Evangelism and Denying Self at A Word Fitly Spoken

A friend or relative wants me to use an opposite sex name and pronouns for him (or her). Is that biblical?

The Mailbag: What’s In a Name?

Pride, Pronouns & Prodigals at A Word Fitly Spoken

I suspect someone has surgically altered her body to appear to be the opposite sex.

The Mailbag: Lady looks like a dude?

Should a man who presents himself as a woman be allowed to attend women’s events at church?

The Mailbag: Guess who’s coming to (the women’s ministry) dinner?

How should we handle church roles when it comes to medically intersex people?

The Mailbag: Church Roles and Ambiguous Anatomy

Can you point me to some biblical resources on pornography?

Biblical Resources on Pornography

My husband wants me to watch porn with him to spice up our sex life. Should I?

The Mailbag: Should Christian Couples Watch Pornography Together?

I’m including these resources on sexual abuse in this article because the abuse itself is a perversion of biblical sexuality and because the sexual sins addressed above can lead to abuse. If you were victimized by an abuser, you are not guilty of perversion, an act of perversion was committed against you.

What are some practical ways to prevent sexual abuse at my church?

Preventative Measures: 6 Steps SBC Churches Can Take to Prevent Sexual Abuse (Most of this applies to any church)

From Victimhood to Victory: Biblically Helping Abused Women Heal

Band-Aids vs. Chemotherapy: Why Suffering Women are Drawn to False Doctrine and 7 Things We Can do to Help.

4 Ways Christian Advocates for Victims of Abuse Need to Get Biblically Back on Track

My husband and I are having sexual problems that stem from the fact that I was molested as a child. What should I do?

The Mailbag: Potpourri (Sexual abuse, Feminism, Serpent seed doctrine…) 3rd section

Biblical Womanhood Bible Study

Imperishable Beauty: Lesson 11- A Beautiful Wife

January 9, 2019August 28, 2019 Michelle Lesley

Previous Lessons: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10

Read These Selected Scriptures

Lesson 10 focused on our role as godly daughters. In lesson 11, we’ll be examining God’s design for women who are wives.

Questions to Consider

1. In lessons 2 and 3 (links above) we took a look at some of the attributes of a godly wife that we can emulate. Because Proverbs 31 mainly zeroes in on godly character, most of that passage easily applied to most women regardless of marital status. In today’s lesson, rather than attributes to emulate, we’ll be focusing on God’s instructions to obey for wives. Some of these instructions can also apply to unmarried women. Read over today’s passages and explain how unmarried women might apply some of these Scriptures. Why is it important for unmarried women to study passages about married women and vice versa?

2. Examine the Genesis 2 passage. What are the main points God is making about wives and marriage in this passage? What word does this passage use (18,20) to encapsulate a woman’s role in marriage? What does it mean for a woman to be a helper “fit for” or “corresponding to” her husband? Whom did God create first, man or woman? Second? Whom did God create to be the helper, man or woman? How do these two things point to and undergird male headship in marriage? Does the Genesis passage mean that all women have to marry or that the only purpose for which women were created was to be wives?

3. Look at the Ephesians and Colossians passages together. Explain how the relationship between husband and wife is a picture of the relationship between Christ and His church. Write a character sketch of a godly husband and a character sketch of a godly wife according to these passages. Why does God instruct husbands to “love” their wives, but wives to “respect” their husbands? (33) What is the difference, and why doesn’t God give the same instruction to husbands as to wives? What should motivate a wife to submit to her husband? Pretend you are discipling a newly married, newly saved woman who has never read these passages. How would you explain biblical submission to her? How is it “fitting in the Lord” (3:18) to submit to your husband?

4. Study the 1 Peter passage. In verse 1, what is the spiritual state (lost or saved?) of the wives Peter is addressing? The husbands? Imagine Peter wrote this part of his letter to answer a question he had been asked by some of the women of the church. What was the question they asked? Carefully examine the end of verse 1. Does this mean a wife should never share the gospel with her unsaved husband and that he can be saved simply by watching her good behavior? What does it mean? How is biblical submission an aspect of holiness? (5) Some women believe they only have to submit to their husbands if their husbands are saved or if their husbands are acting in a godly way. How does this passage answer that misconception?

What does “adorning” (3-4) mean? Why and how do women usually adorn themselves? How are godly women to adorn themselves? For whom? Why? Explain external adorning versus internal adorning. Which do you think is more winsome to your husband? Compare 3-4 with 1 Samuel 16:1-13. Which is more important to God, the external or internal? Why?

Explain what it means to have a “gentle and quiet spirit“. (4) Can a woman with an outgoing, vivacious personality still have a gentle and quiet spirit? How? How is your spirit different from your personality? How should a godly spirit inform a godly personality? Explain why a gentle and quiet spirit is beautiful and how that beauty is imperishable. Why is a gentle and quiet spirit precious in God’s sight?

5. Make a list, in your own words, of God’s instructions about a husband’s and wife’s sexual relationship found in the 1 Corinthians 7 passage. God considered these instructions important enough to include in the Bible. Why? How is the marriage bed a protection against sexual temptation and sin? (2) How does this passage teach and emphasize the mutuality of the sexual relationship? Is this mutuality limited to the bedroom, or does it extend to other aspects of marriage? Explain the terms “rights” (3) and “authority” (4) in the context of this passage. In our culture, we most often think of sex in terms of pleasure or recreation. Is pleasure or recreation the main concern of this passage? What adjective would you choose to describe the perspective of this passage toward sex?

Homework

Consider the concepts each of today’s passages addresses: the husband’s headship, the wife’s role as helper, respecting your husband, submitting to your husband, your marriage imaging the relationship between Christ and the church, witnessing to an unsaved husband, external adornment vs. internal adornment, the sexual relationship, etc. Pinpoint one aspect you need growth in. Repent of any sin in this area, and spend the next week praying that God will grow you to more Christlikeness in this area. You may even wish to memorize and meditate on a verse you found particularly helpful.

Suggested Memory Verse

Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear— but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious.
1 Peter 3:3-4

Women of Genesis Bible Study

The Women of Genesis: Lesson 3- Eve

November 29, 2017April 2, 2019 Michelle Lesley

Previous Lessons: 1, 2

(By way of reminder, this study will be slightly different from our regular studies. We will be taking a more in depth look at the passages of Genesis that focus on the women we’ll be studying and a more generalized overview of the passages in between. Those “in between” passages may be somewhat lengthy, so instead of reprinting them here, I will be linking to those longer passages on Bible Gateway. Simply click on “Read Genesis X:Y-Z” to start reading.)

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Read Genesis 1:26-2:25

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Questions to Consider

1. You may wish to review Lesson 2 (link above) in preparation for today’s lesson.

2. Examine 1:26-30. What sets human beings apart from the rest of creation? What does it mean to be made in the “image” and “likeness” of God? What responsibilities and instructions did God give Adam and Eve when He created them?

3. What did God mean when He said that man was to “have dominion” (26,28) over the animals and “subdue” the earth (28)? Does God consider animals to be equal to people? How does man’s dominion over the earth reflect and point to God’s dominion over the universe? What are some ways Christians can glorify God as we exercise dominion over creation?

4. What did God instruct Adam and Eve to eat? (29) What were animals to eat? (30) Why do you think God needed to tell Adam and Eve what they and the animals were to eat? Why, at that time in history, did people and animals not eat meat? (Hint: 2:17c- In order to get meat, what do you have to do to another living creature?) Does this instruction still apply today?

5. Study 1:31-2:3. Did God create anything else after He created Adam and Eve? Why did God rest after creating humans?

6. Describe the ecology and horticulture of the earth (2:5-6) and of Eden (2:8-14).

7. Compare the method God used for creating Adam (2:7) to the method He used for creating Eve (2:21-22). What are the differences and similarities? God made man to tend (2:15) the ______ from which he had come (2:7). God made woman to tend (2:18) the ______ from which she had come (2:22).

8. In Genesis 1 (4,10,12,18,21,25,31) God brings each of His creative acts to completion with the statement, “And God saw that it was good.” What is the first thing in Creation that God said was not good? (2:18)

9. Examine 2:18-20. Describe the void in both Adam’s life and in Creation prior to God’s creation of Eve. How did the creation of woman make Adam’s life, and Creation, whole and complete?

10. What was Adam’s job? (2:15,19) What was Eve’s job? (2:18,20)

11. What can we learn about God’s design for gender, sexuality, and marriage from Genesis 1:27-28 and 2:18,20-25?

12. Describe Eve and her world, using today’s passage as your guide. What kinds of things did she see, smell, hear, taste, and feel? What are some of the things she and Adam might have spent their days doing? What did she eat? What did she wear? How would the fact that sin and death had not yet entered the world have affected her daily life, her relationship with Adam, and her relationship with God? How would your daily life, relationships with others, and your relationship with God be different if sin and death had never entered the world?

Homework

As we learned in Lesson 2, Genesis 1:26-30 and 2:5-25 are not two different accounts of the creation of man. Rather, chapter 1 is the condensed version and chapter 2 is the expanded version. Sometimes when we’re studying historical events like this, it can be confusing to our linear way of thinking when the story is not laid out in chronological order.

On a piece of paper or in your word processor, rearrange the verses of Genesis 1:26-2:25 into chronological order.