Husbands – Michelle Lesley

For further study on the books of 1-2 Peter, try my study Living Stones: A Study of 1 & 2 Peter.

1 Peter 3

Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives, 2 when they see your respectful and pure conduct. 3 Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear— 4 but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious. 5 For this is how the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn themselves, by submitting to their own husbands, 6 as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord. And you are her children, if you do good and do not fear anything that is frightening.

7 Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.

8 Finally, all of you, have unity of mind, sympathy, brotherly love, a tender heart, and a humble mind.9 Do not repay evil for evil or reviling for reviling, but on the contrary, bless, for to this you were called, that you may obtain a blessing. 10 For

“Whoever desires to love life
    and see good days,
let him keep his tongue from evil
    and his lips from speaking deceit;
11 let him turn away from evil and do good;
    let him seek peace and pursue it.
12 For the eyes of the Lord are on the righteous,
    and his ears are open to their prayer.
But the face of the Lord is against those who do evil.”

13 Now who is there to harm you if you are zealous for what is good? 14 But even if you should suffer for righteousness’ sake, you will be blessed. Have no fear of them, nor be troubled, 15 but in your hearts honor Christ the Lord as holy, always being prepared to make a defense to anyone who asks you for a reason for the hope that is in you; yet do it with gentleness and respect, 16 having a good conscience, so that, when you are slandered, those who revile your good behavior in Christ may be put to shame.17 For it is better to suffer for doing good, if that should be God’s will, than for doing evil.

18 For Christ also suffered once for sins, the righteous for the unrighteous, that he might bring us to God, being put to death in the flesh but made alive in the spirit, 19 in which he went and proclaimed to the spirits in prison, 20 because they formerly did not obey, when God’s patience waited in the days of Noah, while the ark was being prepared, in which a few, that is, eight persons, were brought safely through water. 21 Baptism, which corresponds to this, now saves you, not as a removal of dirt from the body but as an appeal to God for a good conscience, through the resurrection of Jesus Christ, 22 who has gone into heaven and is at the right hand of God, with angels, authorities, and powers having been subjected to him.

Questions to Consider:

1. According to verses 1-2, what is the biblical way for women to win their husbands to godliness?

2. Does verse 3 prohibit women from wearing jewelry, nice clothes, or fashionable hairdos? How can you tell from the surrounding context? Where does true beauty come from (verses 4-6)?

3. What does verse 7 tell us about how the husband should relate to his wife and the impact that has on his spiritual life?

4. Verses 13-17 talk about suffering due to what reason? Why is it important to defend our faith “with gentleness and respect” (verses 15-16)?

5. What does verse 18 mean when it says Christ suffered, “the righteous for the unrighteous”? Why did Christ have to be sinless to make atonement for our sins on the cross?

Blog Swap, Marriage

Blog Swap ~ When Fulfilling Your Marital Duty Is a Matter of Self Control

December 1, 2014April 18, 2019 Michelle Lesley

It’s time for another awesome blog swap! Blog swaps give me the opportunity to share other talented bloggers with you, plus offer you fresh content that’s a great supplement to our regular fare here. If you’d like to do a swap, click on the link above for more information.

I’m excited to be swapping again with Kaylene of Faithful Feat. Kaylene has a beautiful way of writing about Christian marriage with gentility and grace, and today’s article, dealing with marital intimacy, is no exception.

Let’s be honest, ladies. Sometimes, we’re just not “in the mood.” But do we ever stop to think that Scripture never mentions being in the mood when it talks about our responsibility to the marriage bed? What if we put our husbands first and lovingly give of ourselves?

The question is not, “Do I feel like fulfilling his sexual need tonight?” But rather, “Am I going to use my body to bless my husband, according to his need and according to my marital duty?

Check out Kaylene’s awesome article When Fulfilling Your Marital Duty Is a Matter of Self Control, and don’t forget to follow Faithful Feat on social media.

Blog Swap, Marriage

Blog Swap ~ 5 Ways to Protect Your Husband’s Heart

October 6, 2014April 18, 2019 Michelle Lesley

I’m excited to be swapping again with Kaylene of Faithful Feat. (Check out my last Blog Swap with Kaylene here.) Kaylene’s articles on being a godly wife are so soothing, they help me to calm down, take a deep breath, and say, “Through the power of the Holy Spirit, I can do this. I can grow in godliness in my marriage.”

Today, Kaylene has another great article for us, 5 Ways to Protect Your Husband’s Heart. Usually, we think of our husbands protecting us, but there are ways we can protect them, too. Number two, “Speak Kind Words,” is an area in which I need a lot of improvement.

She expresses thanks for his efforts in his leadership, provisions and parenting, no matter how blundering his efforts may be. She compliments on the good he does and extends grace to the rest.

What are some other things we, as Christian wives, can do
to protect our husbands’ hearts?

Sunday School, Women

Godly Womanhood – Submission (Continued and Review) ~ Sunday School Lesson ~ 12-1-13

December 1, 2013April 5, 2019 Michelle Lesley

These are my notes from my ladies’ Sunday School class this morning. I’ll be posting the notes from my class here each week. Click here for last week’s lesson.

Godly Womanhood – Submission (Continued and Review)
Colossians 3:12-21

I didn’t feel like we got enough chance for discussion during last week’s lesson, so this week we studied Colossians 3:12-21, which neatly summarizes the passage we studied last week: Ephesians 5:22ff.

3:12-17– This passage addresses Christian character and behavior on a more “macro” level. In the church, at work, in society, wherever we go, we are to exhibit compassion, patience, humility, etc.

3:18-21– This passage addresses Christian character at the microcosm level: the family. We are to show the same kindness, love, forgiveness, etc. at home, in the way that God prescribes, that we show to others outside our home. We are to be genuine, the same person at home as we are at work, the store, etc.

Submission to our husbands is “fitting in the Lord.” We don’t submit because of any wonderful quality our husbands possess, who they are, whether or not they treat us like queens, or whether or not they deserve it. We submit out of obedience to the Lord, because we love Him. We offer submission as an offering to the Lord, as “living sacrifices”. (Romans 12:1)

I added one item under “Forgiving as Jesus Has Forgiven Us”:

When people came to Christ in repentance, He didn’t hold a grudge, punish, or demand penance. He didn’t keep a mental list of the ways people had sinned against Him to bring up as ammunition at a later time (1 Corinthians 13:5) . He graciously, lovingly, and completely forgave from the heart.

Marriage, Sanctification, Sunday School, Women

Godly Womanhood – Submission ~ Sunday School Lesson ~ 11-24-13

November 24, 2013April 5, 2019 Michelle Lesley

These are my notes from my ladies’ Sunday School class this morning. I’ll be posting the notes from my class here each week. Click here for last week’s lesson.

Godly Womanhood – Submission
Ephesians 5

Background on Ephesians:

Written by: Paul in A.D. 60-62, from prison in Rome (prison epistle)

To: The church at Ephesus. See Acts 19.

5:1-21– What is the main idea of this section as summed up in verses 1-2?

5:22-23– What does it mean to submit? What does it NOT mean?

1. Greek: hupotasso. Hupo- “under”. Tasso- “Arrange in an orderly manner to a certain position.” Military term

2. Submission does not mean all women submit to all men. (v. 22)

3. Submission is not just for wives whose husbands are Christians. (1 Peter 3:1-2; 1 Corinthians 7:12-16)

4. Submission is not permission for domestic violence.

Domestic violence is serious sin on the husband’s part. Submission is something women lovingly and from a position of power CHOOSE to GIVE, just as Christ, from a position of power, chose to lay down His life for us (John 10:18). If a husband is forcing or demanding submission, it is no longer submission, it is oppression. It’s not a gift, it’s being stolen. The church has a weighty responsibility to act in DV situations, making sure women are safe and men are held accountable. God’s word in no way condones domestic violence or even suggests that women should stay in a dangerous situation. If you are in danger, let your pastor or a trusted friend know so that we can help you!

5. Submission, like a husband’s self-sacrificing love, is about dying to self (Matthew 16:24-25), turning the other cheek, and going the extra mile (Matthew 5:38-42).

5:23-32– Marriage is a picture of the relationship between Christ and His church.

1. V. 23-24- The husband signifies Christ. The wife signifies the church.

2. V. 25- Christ loved the church enough to sacrifice Himself for her.

3. V. 26-27- Christ’s desire is what’s best for the church.

4. V. 28-31- Christ nourishes and cherishes the church.

5. V. 32-33- Christian marriage shows the world the relationship between Christ and His church.

Since none of our husbands love us perfectly as Christ loves the church perfectly, there will be many times when we will need to extend grace and forgiveness.

Forgiving as Jesus Has Forgiven Us

Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you. Ephesians 4:32

To forgive as Jesus forgave, we must remember that the act of forgiveness takes place before the offender’s repentance. (Romans 5:8; 2:4)

To forgive as Jesus forgave, our mercies must be new every morning, just as His are. (Lamentations 3:21-24)

When we pray that God will make us more like Jesus, we have to remember that “He was despised and rejected by men…a man of sorrows and acquainted with grief.” (Isaiah 53:3) and that, “Although He was a son, He learned obedience through what He suffered.” (Hebrews 5:8) And, yet, He was still forgiving to those who caused the suffering.

When Jesus said, “Father forgive them” from the cross, He knew that the people who put Him there had not repented, and many never would. Most would go to their graves thinking they had done the right thing. Still, Jesus demonstrated a heart of forgiveness in the moment, and left the final accounting for their sin to His Father (Luke 23:34).

“Vengeance is mine. I will repay,” says the Lord (Romans 12:19). “To the contrary, if your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink.” (Romans 12:20) We are to “love [our] enemies and pray for those who persecute [us].” (Matthew 5:44). Leave God to deal with his heart. We must do what God has commanded us to do, regardless of circumstances.

Additional Resources

Amazing Love: The Story of Hosea (Also available on DVD and Instant Queue on Netflix)

Losing Weight You Weren’t Meant To Carry by Mike Leake

Christianity + Submissive Wives = Domestic Violence? by Georgia Purdom

Genesis, Wifely Submission, and Modern Wives by Georgia Purdom