Wives – Michelle Lesley

For further study on the books of 1-2 Peter, try my study Living Stones: A Study of 1 & 2 Peter.

1 Peter 3

Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives, 2 when they see your respectful and pure conduct. 3 Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear— 4 but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious. 5 For this is how the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn themselves, by submitting to their own husbands, 6 as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord. And you are her children, if you do good and do not fear anything that is frightening.

7 Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.

8 Finally, all of you, have unity of mind, sympathy, brotherly love, a tender heart, and a humble mind.9 Do not repay evil for evil or reviling for reviling, but on the contrary, bless, for to this you were called, that you may obtain a blessing. 10 For

“Whoever desires to love life
    and see good days,
let him keep his tongue from evil
    and his lips from speaking deceit;
11 let him turn away from evil and do good;
    let him seek peace and pursue it.
12 For the eyes of the Lord are on the righteous,
    and his ears are open to their prayer.
But the face of the Lord is against those who do evil.”

13 Now who is there to harm you if you are zealous for what is good? 14 But even if you should suffer for righteousness’ sake, you will be blessed. Have no fear of them, nor be troubled, 15 but in your hearts honor Christ the Lord as holy, always being prepared to make a defense to anyone who asks you for a reason for the hope that is in you; yet do it with gentleness and respect, 16 having a good conscience, so that, when you are slandered, those who revile your good behavior in Christ may be put to shame.17 For it is better to suffer for doing good, if that should be God’s will, than for doing evil.

18 For Christ also suffered once for sins, the righteous for the unrighteous, that he might bring us to God, being put to death in the flesh but made alive in the spirit, 19 in which he went and proclaimed to the spirits in prison, 20 because they formerly did not obey, when God’s patience waited in the days of Noah, while the ark was being prepared, in which a few, that is, eight persons, were brought safely through water. 21 Baptism, which corresponds to this, now saves you, not as a removal of dirt from the body but as an appeal to God for a good conscience, through the resurrection of Jesus Christ, 22 who has gone into heaven and is at the right hand of God, with angels, authorities, and powers having been subjected to him.

Questions to Consider:

1. According to verses 1-2, what is the biblical way for women to win their husbands to godliness?

2. Does verse 3 prohibit women from wearing jewelry, nice clothes, or fashionable hairdos? How can you tell from the surrounding context? Where does true beauty come from (verses 4-6)?

3. What does verse 7 tell us about how the husband should relate to his wife and the impact that has on his spiritual life?

4. Verses 13-17 talk about suffering due to what reason? Why is it important to defend our faith “with gentleness and respect” (verses 15-16)?

5. What does verse 18 mean when it says Christ suffered, “the righteous for the unrighteous”? Why did Christ have to be sinless to make atonement for our sins on the cross?

Family, Marriage, New Testament, Parenting, Sunday School

All in the Family ~ Sunday School Lesson ~ 12-21-14

December 21, 2014April 5, 2019 Michelle Lesley

These are my notes from my ladies’ Sunday School class this morning. I’ll be posting the notes from my class here each week. Click here for last week’s lesson.

Through the Bible in 2014 ~ Week 51 ~ Dec.14-20
Acts 27-28, Colossians, Philemon, Ephesians, Philippians,
1 Timothy, Titus, 1 Peter
All in the Family

Background

This week we looked at seven New Testament epistles, all, except 1 Peter, written by Paul. All were written to encourage and/or instruct churches and pastors in doctrine and practices as they lived out the Christian life in the church, at home, and in the world. Four of these seven epistles specifically instruct family members on their roles in the home. Today, we’re going to take a look at God’s instructions to wives, husbands, children, and parents.

We’ll be using Colossians 3:18-21 as our outline, fleshing out each role with passages from the other epistles.

Colossians 3:18-21

Wives- Submit

Interestingly, in each of the four passages we’ll be studying today, the roles in the home are addressed in the same order: wives, husbands, children, parents. It’s of particular interest to me that wives are always addressed first. Although Scripture doesn’t tell us why this is the case, I would speculate that this might be for two reasons. First, it follows the order of the Fall (Genesis 2). Eve fell first, then Adam, and God gave her consequences first, then Adam’s. Second, wives -then and now- normally have the most responsibility for the day to day, “in the trenches” management of the home. We have an enormous impact on the emotional and spiritual tone of our marriages and family life.

Colossians 3:18- Submit for the Lord
We are submit to our husbands because it is “fitting in the Lord.” Not because they deserve it. Not because they’re awesome (and when they’re not we don’t have to submit). Not because we want to be the perfect wife. Because it is “fitting” in God’s eyes. This is the role God has ordained for us, and it honors Him when we obey Him.

Ephesians 5:22-24, 33b- Submit for the church
We are to submit to and respect our husbands as a picture of the church’s submission to Christ. In the same way that Hosea’s marriage to Gomer was a picture to Israel of God’s faithfulness to His adulterous people, our submission to our husbands should be a picture, especially to the church, of how the church is to be faithful and obedient to Christ.

1 Peter 3:1-6- Submit for our husbands
We are to be subject to our husbands to win them to godliness– to salvation if they are lost, to obedience to Christ if they are saved. Notice that this is accomplished by our example and behavior, not by nagging or talking them to death. Our “respectful and pure conduct” and our “gentle and quiet spirits” are attractive and winsome and can smooth the way for our husbands to desire to be more godly men.

Titus 2: 3-5- Submit for the world
We are to submit to our husbands “that the word of God may not be reviled.” Lost people are watching us. Will we live in obedience to God’s word and show them that it proves true? That they can trust the same Christ we trust?

Husbands- Love

Colossians 3:19- Love for your wife
Husbands are to love their wives and treat them kindly. The Greek form of the phrase “do not be harsh” means not to be bitter or resentful. Wives are imperfect, sinful people (just like husbands) and husbands are to be merciful and forgiving when their wives fall short, not hold bitterness or resentment against them.

Ephesians 5:25-33- Love for the world and the church
Husbands are to love their wives as a picture of Christ’s love for His bride, the church. Christ gave both His life and His blood for the church. When husbands daily love their wives in a self-sacrificing way, they are showing the world -and the church- Jesus.

1 Peter 3:7- Love for your own spiritual life
Husbands are to be understanding with their wives and honor them because they are brother and sister in Christ. Just as a rift between two fellow Christians can hamper their worship and church unity, sinning against his wife by failing to love her as Christ commanded will hinder a man’s relationship with the Lord.

Children- Obey

Colossians 3:20- Obey for the Lord’s pleasure
Children are to obey their parents. In everything. They are not to be allowed to back talk or do as they please in defiance of their parents. Why? It’s so simple even a child can understand it: this pleases the Lord. When children obey their parents, they are fulfilling the role God has ordained for them.

Ephesians 6:1-3- Obey because it’s right. Obey for your well-being.
Obedience to parents is right because God says it is. It is His very first “horizontal” (our relationship with others) Commandment in the Decalogue (the first four are “vertical”- our relationship with God). It is also the first Commandment with a promise- that things will go well for those who obey it.

Parents- Train

Colossians 3: 21- Train for their emotional well-being
Whom does Paul address in this statement? Fathers. While mothers have a huge responsibility to train their children in godliness on a daily basis, the buck stops with Dad. God has been holding dads responsible for their families since He called out, “Adam, where are you?” in the Garden. Fathers are not to rule with an iron fist, but encourage and grow their children in the ways of the Lord.

Ephesians 6:4- Train for their spiritual well-being
Paul again addresses fathers. Fathers are to take seriously their responsibility for the spiritual health of their families. They are not to act or treat their children in ways that frustrate them needlessly. Fathers are to train their children in the Scriptures and discipline them biblically.

Titus 2:4- Train out of love
This is the only part of these passages where Paul specifically addresses a mother’s relationship with her children. She is simply to love them. Of course, it is not loving to let a child do as he pleases. We have already seen that God commands children to obey their parents. So a mother is to lovingly train her child in God’s word and in obedience to God and to parents.

In His wisdom and goodness, God has ordained certain roles and responsibilities for each member of the family. We show our love and honor for God when we seek to obey Him by fulfilling our roles as He empowers and enables us to do so.

Blog Swap, Marriage

Blog Swap ~ When Fulfilling Your Marital Duty Is a Matter of Self Control

December 1, 2014April 18, 2019 Michelle Lesley

It’s time for another awesome blog swap! Blog swaps give me the opportunity to share other talented bloggers with you, plus offer you fresh content that’s a great supplement to our regular fare here. If you’d like to do a swap, click on the link above for more information.

I’m excited to be swapping again with Kaylene of Faithful Feat. Kaylene has a beautiful way of writing about Christian marriage with gentility and grace, and today’s article, dealing with marital intimacy, is no exception.

Let’s be honest, ladies. Sometimes, we’re just not “in the mood.” But do we ever stop to think that Scripture never mentions being in the mood when it talks about our responsibility to the marriage bed? What if we put our husbands first and lovingly give of ourselves?

The question is not, “Do I feel like fulfilling his sexual need tonight?” But rather, “Am I going to use my body to bless my husband, according to his need and according to my marital duty?

Check out Kaylene’s awesome article When Fulfilling Your Marital Duty Is a Matter of Self Control, and don’t forget to follow Faithful Feat on social media.

Blog Swap, Christian women, Marriage

Blog Swap ~ Speaking Your Approval

November 3, 2014April 18, 2019 Michelle Lesley

Once again, we’ve got a great article from Kaylene of Faithful Feat. Kaylene has written some insightful articles about marriage that will be especially helpful to Christian wives. Today, she’s sharing with us how to build up your husband by speaking words of approval to him.

You love your husband. You know it, he knows it, your kids know it, your friends and family know it….He kinda needs to hear you say it. A man likes that kind of thing. He won’t ask for it. He might not even know he craves your approval. But, he does.

Click here to continue reading, and don’t forget to subscribe and follow Faithful Feat on social media!

Blog Swap, Marriage

Blog Swap ~ 5 Ways to Protect Your Husband’s Heart

October 6, 2014April 18, 2019 Michelle Lesley

I’m excited to be swapping again with Kaylene of Faithful Feat. (Check out my last Blog Swap with Kaylene here.) Kaylene’s articles on being a godly wife are so soothing, they help me to calm down, take a deep breath, and say, “Through the power of the Holy Spirit, I can do this. I can grow in godliness in my marriage.”

Today, Kaylene has another great article for us, 5 Ways to Protect Your Husband’s Heart. Usually, we think of our husbands protecting us, but there are ways we can protect them, too. Number two, “Speak Kind Words,” is an area in which I need a lot of improvement.

She expresses thanks for his efforts in his leadership, provisions and parenting, no matter how blundering his efforts may be. She compliments on the good he does and extends grace to the rest.

What are some other things we, as Christian wives, can do
to protect our husbands’ hearts?