Mailbag – Page 55 – Michelle Lesley

My adolescent son has been engaging in recurring sinful behavior that I believe might have led to a mental illness. He recently attempted suicide and his doctor believes medication is the best treatment option. I don’t know what to do. I just know I want my child to be safe. I know you aren’t a doctor, but I was wondering if you had any advice about other things we could try instead.

I know this is a really difficult situation, and I deeply wish I could be of more help. However, as you rightly pointed out, I’m not a doctor and don’t know your son’s situation, so I wouldn’t dream of suggesting changing or stopping any particular treatment.¹

In addition to working closely with your son’s doctors, I would recommend a few things:

1. Continue to pray for his salvation and repentance. Share the gospel with him and point him to Christ whenever you have the opportunity to do so, but use wisdom and be sure you’re not pushing him past what he can deal with at the moment. Trust the Holy Spirit to do the work on your son’s heart that only He can do.

2. Set up an appointment with your pastor for counseling- for you, your husband, and any other children still living at home. If your son would be willing to see your pastor for counseling – in addition to any other treatment he’s receiving, not instead of – that would probably be beneficial as well. Your pastor should have received training in counseling in seminary and can help guide your family through this situation.

3. If your pastor is unable or unwilling to counsel you (or in addition to your pastor’s counseling), you might want to seek out a Certified Biblical Counselor through the Association of Certified Biblical Counselors. This is not secular counseling with a Christianish tilt to it, but counselors who have received extensive training in Scripture, theology, and counseling to help you apply the Bible to your situation as you walk through it, and help your son understand his sin and the gospel. They are very helpful, and I highly recommend them.

As I said, I wish I could do more to help. I can’t imagine how painful this must be for you. I’m taking a moment to pray for you now, and ask everyone reading this to pray for this family as well.

¹A brief note to my readers- I know many of you strongly disagree with psychological and psychiatric treatment. There are many aspects of these disciplines which I disagree with as well. However, it would be dangerous, unethical, unwise, and ungodly for me to recommend for or against any specific type of treatment in this forum. Any comments suggesting this parent should discontinue any type of mental health treatment her child is currently receiving will not be published.

If you have a question about: a Bible passage, an aspect of theology, a current issue in Christianity, or how to biblically handle a family, life, or church situation, comment below (I’ll hold all questions in queue {unpublished} for a future edition of The Mailbag) or send me an e-mail or private message. If your question is chosen for publication, your anonymity will be protected.

Mailbag

The Mailbag: What is KJV-Onlyism, and Is It Biblical?

July 3, 2017March 11, 2023 Michelle Lesley

I’m a fairly new Christian and still trying to get my footing in many areas of basic theology, including which Bible translation is best to use. A friend of mine is a “KJV-Onlyist” and has been very critical when I’ve explored other translations. I’ve tried using the KJV, but I find it very hard to understand. Is it wrong or unbiblical to use a modern English translation such as the ESV? If not, how can I explain this to my friend?

Welcome to the family of Christ! Having been raised in church and saved at an early age myself, I can only imagine how overwhelming it must be to assimilate into a totally new culture and begin trying to understand so many different aspects of the Christian life all at once.

A little background information for readers who are not familiar with some of the terminology in your question: KJV stands for King James Version, the 1611 English translation of the Bible that contains all the “thee’s” and “thou’s”. It’s the translation most familiar to the English speaking world. ESV stands for English Standard Version, a modern American English translation of the Bible first published in 2001.

In a nutshell, “KJV-Onlyists” generally believe that the KJV is the only acceptable translation for use by Christian individuals and churches. Many believe this because they mistakenly think that the translation itself is inspired by God in the 2 Timothy 3:16-17 sense. (The correct understanding of inspiration is that the original autographs – the actual words Moses, David, Paul, James, etc. wrote – are what were inspired by God.)

As with most belief systems, KJV-Onlyism is a spectrum of beliefs. On one end of the spectrum are KJVO’s who hold that you’re not saved or that you’re promoting false doctrine if you use any translation other than the KJV (Ironically, this extreme belief is itself false doctrine, or actual heresy if use of the KJV is in any way tied to salvation. Even the King James Version of the Bible does not teach this.). On the other end of the spectrum are what I, personally, would call KJVP’s (preferred). These are KJVO’s who strongly prefer KJV. This is the “official” version they use in their churches and want their church members to use, but they do not tie its use to salvation or disparage those who use other accurate translations. This stance is merely a preference of a particular church or individual, and is not false doctrine. And, of course, there are varied beliefs between the two ends of the spectrum.

The KJV is a perfectly great translation to use if it’s what you prefer. Christians have used it for hundreds of years and have grown in their relationship with Christ just fine. However, it can be confusing for speakers of modern English. Additionally, while it is still an acceptably accurate translation, several modern translations are technically more accurate due to the discovery of thousands of biblical manuscripts over the last 400 years. It is for these reasons I typically recommend either the ESV or the New American Standard (NASB) version. Both are highly accurate and easier to understand for 21st century readers. I used the NASB for about twenty years, then switched to the ESV about four years ago. I love both of them for their accuracy and ease of reading. For more information on choosing an English Bible translation, please see my article The Mailbag: Which Bible Do You Recommend?.

If you need some materials to share with KJVO’s or would like to study the issue more yourself, please see the Additional Resources section below.

Additional Resources

King James Onlyism by James White

The King James Only Controversy: Can You Trust Modern Translations? by James White

Missing Verses in the Bible – Part 1 Part 2 by Gabriel Hughes

Are the translations of the Bible inspired? at Compelling Truth

What is the KJV Only movement? at Got Questions

Mailbag

The Mailbag: Potpourri (Narnia, Michelsen, Faith healing…)

June 26, 2017June 8, 2019 Michelle Lesley

Today’s edition of The Mailbag is a tad different in format. Usually, I answer one reader’s question in a long form article. Today, I’m addressing various questions from several readers in a “short answer” format.

Just a reminder- I changed my comments/e-mail/messages policy a few months ago, so I’m not responding individually to most e-mails and messages. Here are some helpful hints for getting your questions answered more quickly. Remember, the search bar can be a helpful tool!

Why are witchcraft and magic OK to most Christians in C.S. Lewis’s The Chronicles of Narnia books, but not in secular books such as the Harry Potter books? Should my children be reading the Narnia books?

Obviously, I can’t answer for every individual Christian who finds Narnia OK but Harry Potter objectionable. Many perfectly godly Christians find both objectionable or neither objectionable. But generally, I think it’s the same reason most Christians assume Beth Moore, Andy Stanley, Lysa TerKeurst, Christine Caine, Hillsong, etc., are biblically legit- most Christians aren’t very discerning. They naïvely trust that if a person has gained notoriety as a “Christian” celebrity and his stuff is sold in Christian bookstores, he’s teaching sound biblical doctrine.

I’m not saying that Lewis teaches unbiblical doctrine in the Narnia books (none sticks in my memory, but it’s been at least 8-10 years since I read them) I’m just saying if you put a Narnia book and a Harry Potter book side by side on the table in front of the average Christian she’s going to say, “Narnia- good. Harry Potter- bad.” and that’s going to be the extent of her thought process because she knows Lewis is a famous evangelical and J.K. Rowling is not.

Witchcraft and the occult are not things to be taken lightly. You should also know that there is credible evidence that C.S. Lewis held some very unbiblical beliefs, some of which, if true, would put him outside the camp of Christianity (particularly his rejection of penal substitutionary atonement). With regard to whether or not your children should read the Narnia books, my counsel would be to study what the Bible has to say about witchcraft, the occult, and the things Christians should focus their thoughts on, examine the books for yourself, pray for wisdom, and make what you determine to be the most God-honoring decision for your family. You may wish to get some guidance from your pastor or a mature Christian friend, too.

What are your thoughts on Johanna Michaelsen?

In the last “potpourri” edition of The Mailbag I said I had heard Johanna Michaelsen’s name but didn’t really know anything about her. Since that time a couple more people have asked me about her and I’ve found out a tad more about her (It’s not that there’s no information available, just that I haven’t had time to research her much.).

Johanna is recommended by my friend Amy Spreeman of Berean Research. Amy also serves on Johanna’s ministry advisory board. So it sounds like Johanna is someone worth looking into as a trustworthy resource. However, as Amy and Johanna (assuming she is like-minded) would probably agree, you cannot simply trust someone else’s endorsement. You must do the work of a good Berean and examine everything you take in against Scripture to discover whether it is doctrinally sound. I’m hoping you’ll find Johanna easily passes that test.

Not sure where to start? My article Is She a False Teacher? 7 Steps to Figuring It Out on Your Own may help.

How do you reconcile passages such as Luke 2:22-35 (Simeon awaiting Jesus at the temple) with the principle that God only speaks to us through Scripture?

I would classify it in the same Hebrews 1:1-2 category as God speaking to Moses through the burning bush, or Ezekiel’s vision of the dry bones, or Jeremiah’s prophecy at the potter’s house. God spoke to Simeon in the same Old Testament sense as any of the other Old Testament prophets He spoke to before Jesus came. (In fact, you might even say John the Baptist, who came after Simeon, was the last “Old Testament” prophet.)

It’s a little confusing to us because we read about Simeon in the New Testament after the intertestamental period, and after Jesus had actually been born, but at the time he spoke these words, he was effectively living in “Old Testament times.” (Which is why we also see in this passage that the reason Simeon encountered Jesus is that Mary and Joseph were presenting Him at the temple to “fulfill the law of Moses.”) Jesus had not yet fulfilled His earthly mission of living a sinless life, teaching, preaching and miracles, founding the church, dying on the cross, resurrecting from the grave, and ascending into Heaven. Until those things were accomplished, Simeon, Jesus, and all of the other Jews living at that time were still under the Mosaic (Old Testament) Covenant.

You might find my article Basic Training: The Bible is Sufficient to be helpful.

Do you believe that supernatural healing still occurs today?

Yes. I believe that God can heal miraculously, through doctors and medicine, and through the way He designed the body to heal itself when ill or injured.

What I do not believe in is “faith healing” as it is commonly understood and practiced today. I’ve never encountered a person who teaches and practices faith healing who also adheres to sound biblical doctrine, and I’ve never encountered a person who adheres to sound biblical doctrine who teaches and practices faith healing.

If what you’re really asking is whether I’m a continuationist or a cessationist, I’m a cessationist.

What are your thoughts on Francis Chan?

When Francis Chan first became popular, he had a reputation for being a doctrinally sound Reformed pastor and author. I never read any of his books or followed him closely, but I have godly friends who did.

In 2013 Francis spoke at International House of Prayer’s (IHOP) One Thing conference where he praised Mike Bickle, embraced him as a Christian brother, and tacitly accused discerning Christians who had wisely, and biblically, discouraged him from participating in the conference of dissension and division.

If you are unaware of the theological problems with IHOP, you should know that it (along with Bethel Church in Redding, California) is basically ground zero for the heretical New Apostolic Reformation movement. Chan spoke at One Thing again in 2015, demonstrating a shocking lack of awareness of the unbiblical theology of Catholicism, and called for evangelical unity with Catholics saying, “And I think it’s time for us to get beyond, okay, I’ll sing with them, okay, I’ll worship with them, y’know, okay, I’ll admit that they’re Christians, and go to a biblical stance which says I can’t live without them. I need them. They’re indispensable.”

I don’t know whether or not Chan’s early books and materials were doctrinally sound, but I would definitely not recommend him now. Someone who is a pastor has no excuse for being so undiscerning and ignorant of errant theology.

I am wondering if a Christian believes in speaking in tongues is for today would you recommend that people shouldn’t follow them just as you have recommended people not follow other people for different reasons?

I don’t usually proactively recommend – share their articles, quotes, etc. on social media or the blog, suggest people attend their churches or conferences, read their books, and so forth – continuationists who are otherwise doctrinally sound, but I don’t warn against them either. I just tend to be silent about them.

There are many false teachers I do warn against, and most of them are continuationists, but continuationism is not the central reason I warn against them. When I warn against a teacher, it is because he or she is teaching demonstrably false doctrine and/or walking in unrepentant sin.

My article Is She a False Teacher? 7 Steps to Figuring It Out on Your Own explains the criteria I use when deciding whether or not to recommend a particular teacher.

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The Mailbag: Did Jesus Really Teach Karen Ehman’s 3 Step Life Plan?

June 12, 2017January 27, 2026 Michelle Lesley

Have you read Karen Ehman’s new book? She takes Matthew 22:36-40 and says this:

Jesus asserts that the entire teaching of God-all the law and the prophets – hinge upon these commands which can be summed up in this 3 step life plan:
1. Love God
2. Love others
3. Love yourself

Is this a biblical way of looking at this passage?

It’s great that you’re being a good Berean and examining this teaching (as we should with all teaching) “to see if these things [are] so.”

I’ve never heard of Karen Ehman before and haven’t read any of her books. The quote above is a very brief excerpt and – in the same way we don’t rip Bible verses out of context and try to interpret them – I’m hesitant to try to extract deep meaning from it without a broader grasp of what she’s trying to teach (i.e. more context), so I’ll be limiting myself to the quote you’ve sent and not trying to speculate on her theology in general.

However, there are a few problems with the quote itself that could be as minor as sloppy wording that needs cleaning up or as major as false doctrine. Without more context I just can’t tell.

1. To say that “the entire teaching of God” equals “all the law and the prophets” isn’t too problematic if you’re a first century Jew, but it’s going to be confusing to the 21st century reader. At the moment in history when Jesus spoke this passage, all the law and the prophets was the entire written teaching of God. But remember, Jesus, at this point in Matthew, is nearing the end of His earthly ministry. He has been teaching for about three years, so that’s three years’ worth of God’s teaching that hasn’t been written down yet- the gospels.

And what was Jesus teaching during those three years- keep the commandments? No. He was introducing the new covenant: “The time is fulfilled, and the kingdom of God is at hand; repent and believe in the gospel.” (Mark 1:15) If you’re going to use a phrase like “the entire teaching of God” for New Testament Christians, you really need to be talking about Christ and the gospel, which will include all of the New Testament as well as the Old. Jesus did not teach a three step life plan of commandment-keeping, He taught that all of the Old Testament points to, and is fulfilled in, Christ and the gospel.

2. As I mentioned, context is indispensible when it comes to understanding Scripture. I don’t know if this quote was lifted out of a chapter in which Karen is exegeting the entirety of Matthew 22 (in which case the quote wouldn’t be completely inaccurate) or if she is making her own point about Christians following this “three step life plan” and flying in verses 36-40 to try to support it. If it’s the latter, she has taken these verses out of context and incorrectly interpreted and applied them.

If you back up and read 21:45-22:46, looking particularly at 21:45, 22:15, 18, 23, 34-35, 41, 46, it’s easy to see that most of the things Jesus is saying here are in direct response to (or at least within earshot of) the scribes, Pharisees, and Sadducees, who are asking Him questions- not because they’re genuinely trying to learn and looking for a life plan to follow, but because they’re trying to trap Him and find some grounds for discrediting or arresting Him. If Karen had at least included verses 34-35 in her quote (and she may have addressed these verses outside of this quote, I just don’t know), this would have been much clearer.

Jesus is not saying – either to the Pharisees He was talking to then or to us now – “Here are the three guidelines by which I want you to live your life.” They’re asking Him a question on a point of Old Testament law and He’s answering them according to Old Testament law. They weren’t sincerely asking Jesus how He wanted them to live, and He knew that. And that’s probably the reason He answered briefly and didn’t continue teaching them. He knew they weren’t interested in believing in and following Him- they were out to get Him. Why give what is holy to dogs or cast His pearls before swine, right?

3. We need to understand that the commands Jesus refers to in this passage are just that: commands. Old Testament law. Christians are neither saved nor do we grow in Christ (sanctification) by striving to keep Old Testament law. Galatians 3 is very clear about this:

O foolish Galatians! Who has bewitched you? It was before your eyes that Jesus Christ was publicly portrayed as crucified. 2 Let me ask you only this: Did you receive the Spirit by works of the law or by hearing with faith? 3 Are you so foolish? Having begun by the Spirit, are you now being perfected by the flesh?

As Christians our singular focus is to love Christ. That’s the engine that pulls the train. Obedience to commands, growth in holiness, evangelism, fruit, faith, knowledge of God’s word, all of those things are the train cars that follow, and are propelled by, the engine. When we make obeying commands (especially Old Testament commands) our primary focus, we’ve got things backwards. The caboose is trying to pull the engine. Christians are led by the gospel, not Old Testament commands.

4. The most glaring problem with this quote, and one that no additional context can justify, is number 3: “Love yourself.” You will search long and hard, and you will not find a single verse of Scripture that tells us to love ourselves. This passage of Matthew doesn’t teach that, nor does any other book of the Bible.

Want to know why?

Because man’s entire problem – the essence of what separates us from God – is that we already love ourselves too much. And the solution to that problem is to stop loving ourselves, die to self, kick self off the throne, and love Jesus supremely instead.

But understand this, that in the last days there will come times of difficulty. 2 For people will be lovers of self, lovers of money, proud, arrogant, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, 3 heartless, unappeasable, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not loving good, 4 treacherous, reckless, swollen with conceit, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, 5 having the appearance of godliness, but denying its power. Avoid such people. 6 For among them are those who creep into households and capture weak women, burdened with sins and led astray by various passions, 7 always learning and never able to arrive at a knowledge of the truth. 8 Just as Jannes and Jambres opposed Moses, so these men also oppose the truth, men corrupted in mind and disqualified regarding the faith.
2 Timothy 3:1-8

Lots of people look at “love your neighbor as yourself” and think it means, “You can’t love your neighbor unless you first know how to love yourself.” Uh uh. That’s not what that verse means, and it’s a very self-centered, rather than Christ-centered, way to read it. Jesus – who knows the hearts of men, who said that those hearts are wicked and deceitful – would never tell us we need to love ourselves more. His point was that we are by nature already so self-centered, self-focused, and selfish that we need to put self aside and love and prioritize others that much instead.

Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others.
Philippians 2:3-4

And he said to all, “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me.
Luke 9:23

“Love yourself” is the antithesis of the gospel.

As I said, this is a very brief quote, and I haven’t read the book, so I’m hoping what Karen is saying here is just an innocent vocabulary fumble or that, perhaps, I’ve misunderstood her point due to lack of context.

However, once I finished writing my answer, I did a quick Google search in hopes of finding out more about Karen and gaining some insight as to where she’s coming from. Unfortunately, I found out that Karen works for Proverbs 31 Ministries as a speaker, “the Speaker Track Director of the Proverbs 31 She Speaks Conference and a teaching staff member of their writers’ training site COMPEL.”

As you may already know, Proverbs 31 is the ministry of Lysa TerKeurst who is a false teacher¹. Because Scripture tells us that we’re not to partner with false teachers, because partnering with a false teacher demonstrates a lack of discernment and either disobedience to, or a failure to understand, Scripture, and because of what, at best, seems to be a misunderstanding of Scripture in the quote cited here, I would recommend that you not follow or receive teaching from Karen Ehman.

¹If you are considering commenting or sending me an e-mail objecting to the fact that I warn against false teachers, please click here and read this article first. Your objection is most likely answered here. I won’t be publishing comments or answering emails that are answered by this article.

Mailbag

The Mailbag: Remarriage After Salvation

June 5, 2017June 8, 2019 Michelle Lesley

Prior to getting saved, I had married and then divorced. Once I became a Christian, I married my second husband. God has blessed us with children and we have been married nearly twenty years. What is your take on a second marriage when your first is before becoming a Christian?

Whew, this is a tough question! It’s a really good one to ask, too, because the simple act of wondering about it indicates a desire to be obedient to God and an understanding that, in most cases, divorce is a sin- one that God takes just as seriously as other sins. And I think we forget that sometimes because divorce has become so prevalent in our culture and, sadly, even the church.

The reason this is a tough question is that there’s no particular Bible verse that specifically says, “Yes, it’s OK for you to marry again if your divorce was prior to your salvation,” or “No, it’s not OK.” So, we have to glean what we can from the Scriptures we have.

There are two main topics we need to examine here: what the Bible says about divorce and what the Bible says about salvation. We need to work backwards a little bit, so let’s start with divorce.

It is helpful to start off by reading what Scripture says about marriage and divorce. The central passages are Genesis 2:18-25, Malachi 2:13-16, Matthew 5:31-32, Matthew 19:3-9, and 1 Corinthians 7:10-16. The Bible specifically cites two¹ biblically allowable grounds for divorce in the New Testament: adultery and abandonment by an unsaved spouse.

God does not require divorce in these situations. Indeed, as far as it depends on the Christian spouse who has been sinned against, and is possible, forgiveness and reconciliation – especially in light of how much Christ has forgiven us and reconciled us to Himself – should be the goal. I personally know of marriages that survived these situations and have brought much glory to God and hope to other couples as a result. Yes, it’s excruciatingly hard. No, it’s not fair. It was hard and unfair for Jesus to go to the cross for our sin, too, but He was willing because of His love for us and for the Father.

Seeking a divorce for reasons¹ other than these two – such as irreconcilable differences, “falling out of love,” etc. – are not allowed by Scripture for Christians.

But our sister asking the question wasn’t a Christian when she got divorced. How does that factor in?

Here, we need to recall the nature of salvation- the foundational differences between a lost person and a saved person. First Corinthians 2:12-14, John 14:23-24, Hebrews 11:6, and Romans 3:9-20 help us understand that – while a lost person might sometimes be able to outwardly behave in a way which appears to comply with Scripture – that’s not obedience to God. Obedience is an action of the heart that is made possible only by the transformation and indwelling of the Holy Spirit. Only saved people are transformed and indwelt by the Holy Spirit, which means only saved people can obey God and His word. So, not to over-simplify, but, basically, everything lost people do is sin because they are in a spiritual state (devoid of the Holy Spirit) that renders them unable to be obedient to God. This means that our reader’s divorce was sinful – regardless of whether or not it was for one of the two biblical reasons – because all of her behavior prior to salvation – divorce, driving a car, giving money to charity, eating breakfast – sprang from a heart that belonged to her father, the Devil.

(I know that’s pretty heavy, so if you’re not grasping it, or find yourself in disagreement, I’d encourage you to go back and read over the Scriptures I’ve hyperlinked above.)

But when someone repents and trusts Christ as Savior, all of that sin gets wiped out instantaneously. The old has gone, 2 Corinthians 5:17 tells us. Salvation is more than just new life, it’s also a death. It’s a death to sin. Death to the old man, the old desires, the old ways, the old thoughts. That whole sinful ball of wax gets crucified – nailed to the tree – with Christ, and dies. Including that divorce.

And when Christ resurrects us from that death, we are born into a new life. Baptism is a beautiful, visible picture of this invisible spiritual truth: we are buried with Christ in baptism and raised to walk with Him in newness of life. The old has gone. The new has come. A new life. A clean slate. Life has just started for this sister. There is no biblical reason she should not have married a godly husband.

In closing, there are a few things that don’t pertain to this particular reader’s question (since her divorce, salvation, and remarriage are already a done deal), but which might be pertinent to others in similar situations.

1. This reader did not ask whether or not she should leave her second husband (nor does she want to- she is happily married). She already knows that would be wrong, and she’s correct about that. We don’t fix one sin by committing another.

2. If this reader had asked me this question prior to marrying her second husband. I would have urged her to first explore the possibility – depending on the circumstances¹ and with intense pastoral counseling – of reconciliation with her first husband. That is what 1 Corinthians 7:10-16 is all about.

3. Marriage is a huge thing. Divorce is a huge thing. Remarriage is a huge thing. Whatever your particular situation might be, search the Scriptures about it, ask God for wisdom and direction, and get wise counsel from your pastor.

4. This was a challenging question to answer. I’d like to thank my husband and two of my pastor buddies for their help. Thanks, guys. Y’all are awesome!