Tag: Christian Women

Encouragement, Suffering, Tragedy

Throwback Thursday ~ Weeping with Those Who Weep

Michelle Lesley

Originally published August 26, 2016

It was the week after the historic Louisiana flood of 2016. I was driving down the road, if sitting through three red light cycles per intersection due to horrendous traffic could rightfully be called “driving,” that is. Hot and sweaty, filthy, emotionally drained, and exhausted from cleaning and hauling, I was making my way from my friend’s flooded house to help out at my ninety-five year old grandmother’s flooded house, guilt-stricken that I couldn’t be in both places at once.

And that’s when I heard it.

I was listening to one of my favorite theological podcasts, and when the host began talking about the flooding in Baton Rouge, my ears perked up. He began talking about God’s sovereignty- that, because God always does what is best for believers – for our discipline, growth in holiness, increased dependence on Christ, and the like – that this flood was good for us. He said it kindly, lovingly, and backed up with Scripture. And he was absolutely right.

Yet, three days after a life-altering catastrophe, with a heart still raw and broken for my loved ones and my community, it was exactly what I did not need to hear.

It’s crucial to bring good theology to bear on every situation we face in life. We need to apply Scripture to the situations we go through in order to help us make biblical sense of things, walk obediently, give thanks, and glorify God.

And yet, the Bible doesn’t say, “Give a theology lecture to those who weep.” It says, “Weep with those who weep.” Why? God is all about the Word, isn’t He? Why wouldn’t He want us to jump right in and exhort hurting people with scriptural principles?

Because He knows us. He created us.

People need a minute to take a breath and absorb everything that has happened to them before their hearts and minds are ready to transition into thinking theologically about the situation.

Sometimes we just need to sit and cry for a while. And maybe we need someone we love to sit and cry with us. No Romans 8:28. No talk about how God is going to use this to grow us. No discussion of whether God “caused” or “allowed” this tragedy. Just some time to grieve without having to think. And God’s word says that’s OK.

Even Job’s companions, poor theologians though they were, got this part right:

Now when Job’s three friends heard of all this evil that had come upon him, they came each from his own place, Eliphaz the Temanite, Bildad the Shuhite, and Zophar the Naamathite. They made an appointment together to come to show him sympathy and comfort him. And when they saw him from a distance, they did not recognize him. And they raised their voices and wept, and they tore their robes and sprinkled dust on their heads toward heaven. And they sat with him on the ground seven days and seven nights, and no one spoke a word to him, for they saw that his suffering was very great.

Job 2:11-13

But sometimes, even with the best of intentions, maybe without even realizing it, we skip the vital step of making an appointment to sympathize with and comfort our suffering loved ones. We neglect to rend our hearts and sit on the ground and weep with those who mourn. We fail to see that their suffering is very great. And yet this is one of the very ministries Christ calls us to.

For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven.

A time to discuss theology, and a time to weep with those who weep.

Encouragement

Throwback Thursday ~ Testify

Michelle Lesley

Originally published August 9, 2016

When I was a kid, it was commonplace to bring people before the church to give their testimony about how they got saved. More often than not, it seemed like these people had been saved out of all sorts of horrible things: drug use, promiscuity, alcoholism, prostitution, crime, etc.

It made for a dramatic testimony of the power of Christ to save even the worst of the worst, but it often left those of us who had grown up in the church, had been saved at a young age, and had never really done much “bad stuff” feeling somewhat ashamed of our testimonies. As though they were too boring to tell.

Dramatic testimonies often leave those who were raised in church and saved young ashamed of our testimonies. As though they’re too boring to tell.

Recently, I was listening to an older lady give her testimony. She was saved in her 30s, and prior to that had been promiscuous and had a couple of failed marriages. But what struck me most about her story was not that Christ saved her from these things (although that was certainly amazing and glorious), but that this lady so regretted her past sins that she said she used to sit and weep and ask God, “Why didn’t You save me sooner?”.

And it hit me. This lady would have given anything for a “boring” testimony like mine. She has scars and shame that, while covered and forgiven by the blood of Christ, she will always remember and regret.

And it hit me. This lady would have given anything for a “boring” testimony like mine.

If you were saved at a young age and never really did anything “bad”, you, too, have a beautiful testimony that you should never be ashamed of. God not only saved you from your sin, He saved you before you could do many evil things that you would later look back on and regret.

Lots of your brothers and sisters in Christ would give anything to have a “boring” testimony like yours.

Discernment Bible Study

Choose What Is Right: A Study in Discernment- Lesson 12- Wrap Up

Michelle Lesley

Previous Lessons: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11

Wrap Up

Questions to Consider

1. Was there anything new God taught you in this study that particularly impacted you? What was it, and why was it so significant?

2. How is your walk with the Lord different after this study than it was before?

3. What did you learn from this study about the nature and character of God?

4. What did this study teach you about the kinds of false doctrine which are most prolific in evangelicalism today?

5. What did this study teach you about how to “do” discernment (how to vet teachers/ministries, how to talk to a friend about false teachers, etc.)?

6. Have there been any passages or concepts in this study that God used to convict you of disobedience and lead you to repentance? How will you walk differently in this area from now on?

7. Describe one specific, practical way you will apply to your life something you learned in this study.

Homework

  • Spend some time in prayer this week asking God to show you how to put into practice one thing you learned from this study.
  • Using what you’ve learned from this study and the resources that have been provided in each lesson, vet a teacher or ministry whose doctrine you’ve been wondering about. If you’d like to take a practice run at it first, go to the Popular False Teachers & Unbiblical Trends tab in the blue menu bar at the top of this page, select a name from the list – without clicking on it – and do your research. When you’re done, go back to that tab, click on the name, and “check your work” against mine. (Let me know if you turn up any new information that needs to be included in one of my articles!)
  • Recite all of your memory verses from this study. Which one is most meaningful to you right now?
Encouragement, Pop Theology

Wayback Wednesday ~ God created you to do amazing things?

Michelle Lesley

Originally published June 18, 2019

A while back, I saw this meme posted by a woman who is in a significant position of leadership in a Christian organization.

Ladies – especially those of us who lead, teach, and minister to women – we ought not be posting or teaching things like this.

First of all, it’s misleading. This is not what Ephesians 2:10 says. Ephesians 2:10 says:

For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.

Someone has taken it upon herself to summarize the verse in her own words and created a meme which makes it look like Ephesians 2:10 is being quoted. And her summary is incorrect – a mishandling of God’s Word.

Which brings me to point number two. This is not what Ephesians 2:10 means.

The “good works” God has prepared for us to walk in are seldom amazing – at least not in the way we usually define the word “amazing”.

The “good works” God has prepared for us to walk in are seldom amazing – at least not in the way we usually define the word “amazing”. Changing diapers, doing the laundry, breaking up fights between siblings, dealing with unreasonable bosses and annoying co-workers, and scrubbing toilets can all be “good works” God has ordained for us to perform to His glory, but most people wouldn’t call those things “amazing”. They’re mundane. Ordinary. Everyday life types of things.

And that’s OK!

First Thessalonians 4:10b-12 puts it like this:

But we urge you, brothers…to aspire to live quietly, and to mind your own affairs, and to work with your hands, as we instructed you, so that you may walk properly before outsiders and be dependent on no one.

God has called us to serve Him and one another, and that is usually plain, unglamorous, non-prestigious, hard work. Forget “amazing” – often, no one will notice or thank us for our good works, or if they do notice, they might criticize the job we’ve done.

Cotton candy “theology” ends up being discouraging in the long run.

Finally, cotton candy “theology” like this ends up being discouraging in the long run:

“God created me to to amazing things, huh? This morning I ironed, cleaned dog vomit off the rug, and spent an hour ferrying kids to various activities. That doesn’t feel very amazing. When does this ‘amazing’ thing kick in? How long do I have to wait?”

Or:

“I’m a single mom with a full time job and three kids. I barely make it to church every week and struggle to get six hours of sleep a night with all I have to do. I’m exhausted. And now you’re telling me I have to do something ‘amazing’ on top of that?”

Or:

“I’m just an ordinary woman. God hasn’t really given me anything ‘amazing’ to do. Maybe He doesn’t love me. Maybe I don’t have enough faith, or I’m not praying hard enough, or there’s some secret sin in my life that I’m not aware of. Maybe I’m not even saved. What a failure I am.”

Ladies, ideas like the one in this meme do more harm than good. If we want to encourage each other, we need to do it biblically – with what God’s word actually says and with what God’s word actually means – with good, sound theology.

If we want to encourage each other, we need to do it biblically – with what God’s word actually says and with what God’s word actually means – with good, sound theology.

Discernment Bible Study

Choose What Is Right: A Study in Discernment- Lesson 11

Michelle Lesley

Previous Lessons: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10

Responding Biblically to the News that You’re Following a False Teacher

Today’s Scripture passages are embedded in the body of the study. Please click the links in each question.

Questions to Consider

Throughout this study we will be looking at various passages of Scripture rather than working our way through a book of the Bible verse by verse. Because of that, we will need to be extra vigilant to rightly handle these passages in context. I will always attempt to provide the context you need for understanding these passages correctly, but if you need more clarity please feel free to read as much of the surrounding text as you need to – even the whole book, if necessary – in order to properly understand the passage presented.

Someone loves you enough to risk her relationship with you to show you from Scripture that your favorite pastor, author, or evangelical celebrity is a false teacher. How will you respond?

1. Whether or not your favorite author or teacher actually is a false teacher, try to imagine how you would feel if someone told you that person is a false teacher. What would be your initial gut level reaction or emotions?

Consider these passages, keeping in mind your answer to the question above. The Bible often describes the heart as the seat of our “passions” or deep seated emotions. What do these passages tell us about the nature or quality of our heart/passions/emotions? Why should we not be enslaved to our passions? As born again Believers, whose slaves are we? Should we, as Believers, react to any situation – including being told we’re following a false teacher – out of raw, fleshly emotion? How, and with what character traits, do these passages (particularly the last four) describe the way we’re to use our minds to think and respond to life’s circumstances?

Summarize what you learned from these passages into Principle 1 for responding to the news that you’re following a false teacher:

I will respond to the news that I’m following a false teacher by:

2. Study these Scriptures. If someone tells you you’re following a false teacher, should you just blindly believe that person and take her word for it? Be aware that there are biblically demonstrable false teachers, false converts (people who think they’re Christians, but aren’t), and doctrinally unsound “discernment ministries” out there who will tell you, due to their own unbiblical beliefs, that some of today’s most godly, doctrinally sound pastors and teachers are false teachers. How can you know if you’re dealing with someone like that or if it’s a doctrinally sound, discerning Christian warning you against someone who really is a false teacher? What do these passages say to do? How can, for example, a video of a woman preaching to men, or a book or sermon excerpt of someone teaching false doctrine serve as “witnesses” or “evidence” supporting the charge that someone is a false teacher?

Summarize what you learned from these passages into Principle 2 for responding to the news that you’re following a false teacher:

I will respond to the news that I’m following a false teacher by:

3. Examine these passages. Once you have thoroughly searched the Scriptures (rightly handled and in context) and find that the charges your friend has brought against the teacher are true – she really is a false teacher as demonstrated by Scripture – what should you do about continuing to follow and receive teaching from that teacher? What if you find that – according to rightly handled, in context Scripture – the charges are unbiblical, and the teacher you’re following is not a false teacher? Review your answers to questions 1 and 2. How should you respond, point by point, to the allegations that have been made? How did Jesus respond to Satan’s temptations and unbiblical ideas in Matthew 4:1-11 (hint: see 4a, 7a, 10a)? Did Jesus respond with an emotional outburst or personal, subjective opinions?

Summarize what you learned from these passages into Principle 3 for responding to the news that you’re following a false teacher:

I will respond to the news that I’m following a false teacher by:

4. Often, women who follow false teachers feel as though they are in a loving, bonded relationship with those teachers. Examine these Scriptures. What do they teach us about loving Christ compared to loving other people? Does Christ allow us to love those who are most dear to us – our parents and our children – more than we love Him? What does He say about people who do? If we can’t love even our closest family members more than Christ, what do you think He would say about loving your favorite author or teacher more than you love Him? If you don’t love Christ enough to obey Him and stop following your favorite false teacher, what does that say about your love for that teacher versus your love for Christ? How are false teachers a test of our love for and obedience to God? Will you pass the test?

Summarize what you learned from these passages into Principle 4 for responding to the news that you’re following a false teacher:

I will respond to the news that I’m following a false teacher by:

5. Sometimes when someone finds out she has been following a false teacher, she feels betrayed and deeply hurt (as well she should). She wonders how she’ll ever again be able to trust a spiritual authority figure. “If I was duped by this teacher,” she thinks, “what’s to keep me from being duped by the next teacher? I’m not putting myself through that again.” Sadly, at this most vulnerable point, she gives up on church, pastors, and Bible teachers altogether and adopts a “just me and Jesus” perspective.

God’s people as His sheep is a major motif of Scripture. Read these passages. Why do sheep need a good shepherd? How does a shepherd protect and provide for the sheep? How does being in a flock, in the safety of a sheepfold protect a sheep? What happens to a sheep when it strays away from the flock? Does God ever, in these passages or any other you know of, speak as though a sheep being separated from the flock is a good thing?

The majority of the New Testament is about the church. Just off the top of your head (or search for church in a concordance), name 5-6 aspects of church life the New Testament teaches us about. Does the New Testament ever teach us about how to live and grow in Christ as “Lone Ranger Christians” or “just me and Jesus” Christians who are not joined to a local church? Why not? Is it fair to say that God’s perspective, as the Author of the New Testament, is that there is no such thing? If membership in a local church were optional or no big deal to God, why would He have spent so much time and effort establishing it, instructing it, and caring for it?

Why does God command us to be faithful members of a local church? Thinking back to your answers about the sheep, how do the church, and godly, doctrinally sound pastors and elders protect and provide for Christians?

In what ways can a good, doctrinally sound church help someone whom God has delivered from the clutches of false doctrine or a false teacher?

Summarize what you learned from these passages into Principle 5 for responding to the news that you’re following a false teacher:

I will respond to the news that I’m following a false teacher by:

6. Summarize your five principles into a paragraph or two about responding biblically to the news that you’re following a false teacher.

Homework

  • Read (and listen) more on the passages and topics from today’s lesson:

Words with Friends: How to contend with loved ones at A Word Fitly Spoken

The Mailbag: How should I approach my church leaders about a false teacher they’re introducing? (the same principles apply to approaching a friend about a false teacher she’s following)

Women and False Teachers: Why Men Don’t Get It, and Why It’s Imperative That They Do

Basic Training: 7 Reasons Church is Not Optional and Non-Negotiable for Christians

  • Do you have a friend or loved one who is following a false teacher? Set aside some focused time in prayer this week to pray for her and for how you might talk to her about it. Consider each of the five principles you wrote in today’s lesson. Is there anything you can do to make it easier for her to respond in those biblical ways?

Suggested Memory Verse