Michelle Lesley

Originally published April 25, 2008

1.
Thou shalt be a Believer.

“They said, ‘Believe in the Lord Jesus, and you will be saved,
you and your household.'”
Acts 16:31

I can’t imagine undertaking a task as huge as parenting without some divine intervention. It’s a tough job! Most things in life are simpler when you’re a Christian. Not necessarily easier, but usually less complex. Take parenting, for example. If you’re a Christian, parenting by God’s word, you have a plan of action all laid out for you. You don’t have to re-invent the wheel. What should I teach my kid about religion? What do I tell him about pre-marital sex? How do I reassure him about death? It’s all in the Book. If your parenting doesn’t begin and end with the Bible, it can be a much more confusing, fly by the seat of your pants operation.

When you’re a Christian parent, you have the benefit of all the resources in God’s storehouse. You’ve got a God who, at the end of a rough day, says, “Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest.” (Matthew 11:28); a God who promises that wisdom is yours for the asking (James 1:5); a God whose name is “the Lord will provide” (Genesis 22:14); a God whose eyes “…move to and fro throughout the earth that He may strongly support those whose heart is completely His.” (II Chronicles 16:9).

Finally, when you’re a Christian parent pursuing holiness in your own life, God is working on you to make you more like Him: more loving, more joyful, more peaceful, more patient, kinder, better, more faithful, gentler, and more self-controlled. (Ephesians 5:22-23) God is sanctifying you, making you more Christlike, and enabling you to pour the gospel into your children day by day, so that they might come to know Christ as savior. As a parent, there’s nothing more important.

1 John Bible Study

Am I Really Saved?: A First John Check Up ~ Lesson 7: Fear and False Teachers

September 9, 2015March 12, 2026 Michelle Lesley

Am I Really Saved? A First John Check Up
Lesson 7: Fear and False Teachers
Please Read: 1 John 4

Previous Lessons: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6

Examine yourselves, to see whether you are in the faith. Test yourselves. Or do you not realize this about yourselves, that Jesus Christ is in you?—unless indeed you fail to meet the test!

2 Corinthians 13:5

1 John 4:1-6

Am I Really Saved? Checkpoint 13: Do I follow false teachers?

Beloved, do not believe every spirit, but test the spirits to see whether they are from God, for many false prophets have gone out into the world. ²By this you know the Spirit of God: every spirit that confesses that Jesus Christ has come in the flesh is from God, ³and every spirit that does not confess Jesus is not from God. This is the spirit of the antichrist, which you heard was coming and now is in the world already. ⁴Little children, you are from God and have overcome them, for he who is in you is greater than he who is in the world. ⁵They are from the world; therefore they speak from the world, and the world listens to them. ⁶We are from God. Whoever knows God listens to us; whoever is not from God does not listen to us. By this we know the Spirit of truth and the spirit of error.

I’m always dumbfounded when I hear Christian women say – in response to being told their favorite false teacher is a false teacher – something to the effect of, “You’re so negative, judgmental, and nit picky. Jesus just said to love people and not to worry so much about whether their theology is different from yours.”

It always makes me wonder if they’ve ever actually read the New Testament, because that’s absolutely not what Jesus said while He was on earth, and it’s the exact opposite of what God the Holy Spirit spends so much time saying in the balance of the New Testament. This passage of First John is just one of dozens which warn us away from false teachers.

Which Spirit is controlling true Christian teachers? What spirit is controlling false teachers according to verse 3? True or false: If you’re following a false teacher, you’re following a demonic spirit.
What does it mean to “test the spirits”? (v1) How did the noble Bereans test the spirits?
What do verses 2-3 tell us is the first, most basic test of whether or not someone is a false teacher? What does verse 5 tell us is an indication of a false teacher? Are these the only tests for a false teacher?
To whom do the words “we” and “us” refer in verse 6? According to verse 6, do false teachers listen to and teach the same things the apostles taught? How does verse 6 work hand in hand with Galatians 1:6-9?
According to verse 6, if you willfully disregard apostolic (biblical) teaching in favor of false teaching, are you really a Christian? Do you argue with people who can demonstrate to you from (rightly handled) Scripture that you’re following a false teacher?

1 John 4:7-12

Am I Really Saved? Checkpoint 14: Is my motivation for love Christocentric?

Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God, and whoever loves has been born of God and knows God. ⁸Anyone who does not love does not know God, because God is love. ⁹In this the love of God was made manifest among us, that God sent his only Son into the world, so that we might live through him. ¹⁰In this is love, not that we have loved God but that he loved us and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins.¹¹Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. ¹²No one has ever seen God; if we love one another, God abides in us and his love is perfected in us.

If you could state the theme John’s teaching in one word, what would it be? My answer would be “love.” In his gospel, his three epistles, even in Revelation, the concept of love permeates John’s writing. And here again, John draws our attention back to it. The facet of love he focuses on this time is the motivation behind our love for others.

According to verses 7-8, who defines, originates, and is the embodiment of, love? How does this tell Christians Who and what is to motivate any love that we might feel or show to others? Is the “love” that non-Christians feel or show to others motivated by God or by other factors such as affection, selfishness, lust, etc.? Can you truly love others if you do not know God?
If the love you show others is not motivated by God, are you really saved?
In verses 9-10, what is the ultimate definition and demonstration (what action did God take) of the phrase “God is love”?
The word “so” in verse 11 takes us back to God’s ultimate demonstration of love for us in verses 9-10. Think about the people in your life. What are some practical ways you can “so love” one another the way God, through Christ, loved you?
Verse 12 tells us “no one has ever seen God.” How can the world know of God’s love if they have never seen Him? What does the remainder of the verse tell us about how they are to learn of God’s love?

1 John 4:13-15

Am I Really Saved? Checkpoint 15: Do my words and actions confess Christ?

By this we know that we abide in him and he in us, because he has given us of his Spirit. ¹⁴And we have seen and testify that the Father has sent his Son to be the Savior of the world. ¹⁵Whoever confesses that Jesus is the Son of God, God abides in him, and he in God.

How do we know, according to verse 13, that we belong to Christ? How can we tell if we have the Spirit? In what ways do our actions show that we have the Holy Spirit?
John says he and his fellow Christians testify about Jesus. (14) They verbally proclaim salvation through Christ to others. This is a mark of the Christian. Do you share the gospel with others? If not, are you really saved?
Does verse 15 mean that anyone who says the words, “Jesus is the Son of God,” is a Christian? What does it mean to “confess” Jesus? Is it just the words we say or is there more to it? What role does the heart play in this confession?

1 John 4:16-21

Am I Really Saved? Checkpoint 16: Am I afraid of God’s judgment?

So we have come to know and to believe the love that God has for us. God is love, and whoever abides in love abides in God, and God abides in him. ¹⁷By this is love perfected with us, so that we may have confidence for the day of judgment, because as he is so also are we in this world. ¹⁸There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear. For fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears has not been perfected in love. ¹⁹We love because he first loved us. ²⁰If anyone says, “I love God,” and hates his brother, he is a liar; for he who does not love his brother whom he has seen cannot love God whom he has not seen. ²¹And this commandment we have from him: whoever loves God must also love his brother.

Verse 16 makes an interesting statement: “we have come to know AND to believe the love that God has for us.”

What is the difference between knowing God’s love for you and believing God’s love for you? Do you both know AND believe God’s love for you?

Verses 17-18 talk about “perfect” love and being “perfected” in love, but will we ever love God perfectly, or perfectly know and believe His love for us? Not this side of Heaven. Thank goodness these verses aren’t about our imperfect love for Christ, but, rather, Christ’s perfect love for us! The Greek word translated as perfect or perfected means to accomplish or consecrate, to carry through completely, to add what is yet wanting in order to render a thing full. In other words, Christ’s love is accomplished or made full in you when He saves you.

What does the perfect, saving love of Christ give us, according to the middle part of verse 17? What does the last part of the verse, “as he is so also are we in this world” mean? Who is “he”? Why would this give us confidence for the day of judgment?
What word does verse 18 use to convey the opposite of confidence (17)? While Christians will have confidence and face God’s judgment without fear because we are clothed with the righteousness of Christ, how will lost people feel about facing God’s judgment? What do they fear according to the first part of the second sentence of verse 18? What punishment will lost people face?
What does our love (or lack of love) for others say about whether or not we truly know God? (20) What does verse 20 call people who claim to love God but do not love others? Are such people saved?

This week we’ve looked at four more checkpoints in our “Am I Really Saved?” study:

Do I follow false teachers?

Is my motivation for love Christocentric?

Do my words and actions confess Christ?

Am I afraid of God’s judgment?

Saved people don’t cling stubbornly to false teachers. They can usually sense when a teacher is “off” in some way, even if they can’t quite put their finger on what’s wrong. They welcome, rather than argue against, people who show them, from Scripture, why a false teacher is false. Their love for others springs from Christ’s love for them, and their words, actions and attitudes confess the Christ who lives in their hearts. They have no fear of God’s judgment and long to see their precious Savior.

Unsaved people are drawn to false teachers and angrily fight against those who try to warn them away. They may demonstrate actions and feelings that seem like love for others, but because God is the definition of love, and they don’t know Him, they can’t truly love others. Rather than confessing Christ, their words and actions testify that they don’t know Christ, and because of this, they are fearful and uncertain about God’s judgment and the punishment they face in eternity.

Additional Resources:

1 John 4– Matthew Henry’s Commentary

Herein Is Love– by Charles Spurgeon

True or False? A Study in 1 John– at Naomi’s Table (lessons 15-16)

Uncategorized

10 Biblically Sound Blogs and Podcasts by Christian Women

September 4, 2015October 1, 2022 Michelle Lesley

This article has been updated and moved. You can now find it at:

Doctrinally Sound Christian Women to Follow – 1

Parenting, Throwback Thursday

Throwback Thursday ~ Anything to Get the Kids to Read?

September 3, 2015August 31, 2015 Michelle Lesley

Originally published December 9, 2008.

This seems to be a new mantra that has sprung up among parents and educators over the last few years. I’ve heard it many times– said with an almost religious fervor –as though a child who doesn’t read is in the same immediate danger as a child who doesn’t eat.

And whenever I hear this statement made with such intensity, I can’t help but think, “Anything to get the kids to read? Really? Anything?” Just how far are we willing to go for the sake of reading?

Most recently I heard this statement made in response to a topic on my local talk radio station. It seems a high school English teacher assigned his class a book to read that contained a significant amount of profanity. Parents complained. The principal intervened and the assignment was terminated. Many who disagreed with the principal’s decision repeated the litany, almost in unison: “Who cares if there’s profanity? The kids were reading.”

On another occasion, a Christian father and I were discussing the new movie and book, Twilight. He was planning to allow his “tween-ager” to see the movie in hopes that she would then read the books. He had made this decision, not because he thought the subject matter of the books or movie would be good for her (in fact, he indicated that he had decided to allow her to see it against his better judgment of the content), but because he wanted to do something that would get her to read more.

Now, granted, I haven’t read the book series or seen the movie, so my comment stems only from the several reviews and articles I’ve read about them, but has reading become so important even to Christian parents that they feel the need to OK a book/movie for their children that gives at least the appearance of nominal approval to vampirism?

Don’t get me wrong, I think reading is very important. I’m an avid reader, as are my children who are old enough to read independently. I guess I’m just a little perplexed that in a country with freedom of the press, where we have access to a bountiful supply of good books, both Christian and secular, that don’t contain questionable material, we are getting sucked into the mentality that the only way to get kids to read is to present them with books that contain and normalize profanity, occultism, gratuitous violence and gore, inappropriate and explicit sexuality, and any number of other things that we wouldn’t want them exposed to in real life. Why choose books like that when there are so many other better choices?

There are better ways to turn your kids into readers of good books:

Start early- Read to your kids from the time they are infants. Make it a normal, habitual part of life. I used to read to my babies when I was nursing them. I just read aloud from whatever book or magazine I happened to be reading at the moment myself. (That was actually a lot more interesting than reading Green Eggs and Ham or Go Dogs, Go to them a zillion times a day!)

Make it part of the daily routine- Just as you set aside time for brushing teeth, naps, daily devotions, homework, etc., set aside time every day to read to your children, or require your older children to spend a certain amount of time reading every day. One thing I have found that works well with my children is to occasionally allow them to stay up fifteen or twenty minutes past their bedtime, but only if they will use that time to read.

Make reading something to look forward to– Several years ago, I began a practice of reading my older children a book series every summer. We started with the Little House on the Prairie books, then moved to the Narnia books and others. As we near the end of the school year each May, one of the things I have them do is start looking around the library and the internet for the book series they want us to read that summer. They look forward to this each year. Finding an appropriate author or a topic your children like and having them watch for the latest book to come out is another way to build excitement.

Reward reading– Because I love to read so much, it is hard to for me to imagine anyone needing a reward for reading; it’s kind of a reward in itself! Some kids need a little more motivation, though. They might enjoy participating in reading contests such as Pizza Hut’s “Book It” program. Also, check out the programs at your local library. Our library sponsors a reading contest for both kids and adults every summer. It allows the reader to set a goal for the number of books he thinks he can read over the summer and then awards prizes for those who reach their goals. Or, if your kid is dying to see a movie that is based on a certain book, make seeing the movie a reward for reading the book.

Set an example– Be a reader yourself. Find an interesting book and curl up on the couch with your kids while they read their books.

Limit the electronic pacifiers– This is a good idea even if you’re not especially interested in getting your child to read more. Unlimited time in front of the TV, computer, gaming system, or hand-held video games is hazardous to your child’s intellectual health. Conversely, having your child read in order to earn “screen time” can be a good motivator.

As with everything else, it’s important to abide by Biblical principles when choosing reading materials for ourselves and our children. Reading is important, but not as important as filling our kids’ minds with Godliness.

Finally, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, dwell on these things. Philippians 4:8

1 John Bible Study

Am I Really Saved?: A First John Check Up ~ Lesson 6: What is Love?

September 2, 2015March 12, 2026 Michelle Lesley

Am I Really Saved? A First John Check Up
Lesson 6: What is Love?
Please Read: 1 John 3:10-24

Previous Lessons: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5

1 John 3:10-15

Am I Really Saved? Checkpoint 10: Do I love my brothers?

By this it is evident who are the children of God, and who are the children of the devil: whoever does not practice righteousness is not of God, nor is the one who does not love his brother. ¹¹For this is the message that you have heard from the beginning, that we should love one another. ¹²We should not be like Cain, who was of the evil one and murdered his brother. And why did he murder him? Because his own deeds were evil and his brother’s righteous. ¹³Do not be surprised, brothers, that the world hates you. ¹⁴We know that we have passed out of death into life, because we love the brothers. Whoever does not love abides in death. ¹⁵Everyone who hates his brother is a murderer, and you know that no murderer has eternal life abiding in him.

Here, John circles back to love versus hate, but he looks at it from a bit of a different perspective than he used in chapter 2. John draws a parallel between the two different types of brothers- familial and spiritual – and uses these relationships to explain true brotherly love, and why this is a characteristic of Christians.

Which phrase in the first sentence of verse 12 compares non-Christians to Cain? How does verse 15 make this comparison?
Why, according to verse 12, did Cain murder Abel (his brother)? Was it because Abel provoked him or was evil in some way? Verse 13 indicates that the world will hate us for the same reason Cain hated Abel. What is that reason? How does John 3:19-20 relate to this concept?

God’s righteousness, shining through Abel, reflected Cain’s sin back at him. He felt guilty, convicted, and he wanted to get away from those feelings of condemnation. This is the same foundational reason the world hates Christians today. They hate the Christ who lives within us because, in Him, they see their own evil deeds reflected back at them. They feel guilty and convicted, and, wanting to suppress the truth about their sin, they hate us or do whatever else they can to escape those feelings of condemnation.

How is hatred by the world for being Christlike evidence that we belong to Christ?
If hatred is characteristic of the world, what, necessarily, must be characteristic of Christians? (v. 14)
How do you feel when you’re around someone you know is a Christian? Do you enjoy open, easy, godly fellowship with her? Do you ever feel guilty or convicted just by being around her? Does talking with her about the things of God make you feel threatened, defensive, or argumentative?

1 John 3:16-17

OK, the Christian’s life is characterized by love for her brothers and sisters in Christ, but what, exactly, is love? Is it just being nice to people? Being a doormat? Never getting angry? Turning a blind eye to sin? How do we know if we’re acting in love or not?

John gives us a very simple definition: he laid down his life for us, and we ought to lay down our lives for the brothers.

Christ sets the standard for what love is. He defines love. Not our feelings. Not our opinions. Not the world’s definition of love. The cross is the measuring stick against which we measure anything we might call “love.” Anything that falls short isn’t love. This is how we know that things like homosexuality, abuse, sinful jealousy, pedophilia, cohabitation, universalism, living vicariously through your children, adultery, and tolerance of sin are not love. Any “love” that doesn’t look like Christ’s holy, righteous, biblical, dying to self love isn’t love.

He laid down his life for us, and we ought to lay down our lives for the brothers. Did you notice John didn’t say “He died for us and we ought to die for our brothers”? I wonder if that might have anything to do with the fact that there’s more than one way to lay your life down for someone. Certainly, Christ demonstrated His love for us by dying for us on the cross, and, that same love should compel us to willingly die for others if circumstances call for it.

But Christ didn’t just lay down His life for us in death, He laid down His life for us in life, too. Every temptation He resisted, every time He put his own wants and needs aside to put someone else first, every time He humbled Himself to serve others, He was laying down His life for us. And in the same way, we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers. We serve people. We provide for people. Even when it comes at a personal cost. We don’t just talk the talk, John says, we walk the walk.

1 John 3:18-22

Am I Really Saved? Checkpoint 11: Am I bearing the fruit of love?

Little children, let us not love in word or talk but in deed and in truth.¹⁹By this we shall know that we are of the truth and reassure our heart before him; ²⁰for whenever our heart condemns us, God is greater than our heart, and he knows everything. ²¹Beloved, if our heart does not condemn us, we have confidence before God; ²²and whatever we ask we receive from him, because we keep his commandments and do what pleases him.

What does the word “this” in verse 19 refer to?

Let’s face it, there are going to be times when we sin big or again, and it’s easy to give in to those thoughts of, “How could I possibly be saved if I act like that?”. But whenever our hearts condemn us that way, John urges us to look back over the general direction of our spiritual lives. Not so we can feel good about ourselves or because our good deeds somehow make up for our sins, but because God says when our emotions are getting the best of us, that’s a good, objective way to calm down and get some reassurance of our salvation. Is it the desire of my heart to act in love for God and love for others? Do I generally carry that desire through with action? God says we can look to these things as evidence of our salvation.

God knows everything. He knows whether or not you belong to Him, and He wants you to know, too. And if the objective evidence shows you’re saved, you’ll have the confidence to put aside those feelings of condemnation, and boldly approach the throne in prayer, knowing that you keep God’s commandments and do what pleases Him.

What does verse 20 mean when it says “God is greater than our heart”? How does this show us that God is the judge of whether or not we are saved, not us or our feelings?
How do keeping God’s commandments and doing what pleases Him (22) impact the way we pray?

1 John 3:23-24

Am I Really Saved? Checkpoint 12: Do I keep the ultimate commandment?

And this is his commandment, that we believe in the name of his Son Jesus Christ and love one another, just as he has commanded us. ²⁴Whoever keeps his commandments abides in God, and God in him. And by this we know that he abides in us, by the Spirit whom he has given us.

What is the commandment in verse 23? How many parts (notice the second “and”) are there to this command? What does verse 24 indicate about the person who keeps this command?
How do we know that God abides in us? (24b)
Do you keep this commandment? Is your belief in Christ a simple mental acknowledgement, or have you staked your life and eternity on Christ?

The two parts of the ultimate commandment are inseparable: we are to believe in Christ for salvation and love one another. You can’t have one without the other. Those who keep this command can be certain that they are in Christ. The Holy Spirit bears witness to this.

This week we’ve looked at three more checkpoints in our “Am I Really Saved?” study:

Do I love my brothers?

Am I bearing the fruit of love?

Do I keep the ultimate commandment?

Saved people may be hated by the world, but they love their brothers. They can look back over their lives and see evidence of their Christlike love, in word and deed, for others. They keep the ultimate commandment of staking their lives on their belief in Christ and loving their fellow Christians.

Unsaved people often feel guilty, convicted, or defensive around Christians as Christ reflects their sin back at them. They do not have a track record of showing Christlike love for others, and, while they may proclaim belief in Christ, their profession is only lip deep.

Additional Resources:

1 John 3– Matthew Henry’s Commentary

Can I Be Sure I’m Saved?– by R.C. Sproul

True or False? A Study in 1 John– at Naomi’s Table (lessons 13-14)