Mailbag

The Mailbag: Should Christians drink alcohol?

Originally published March 13, 2017

I wanted to know what is your stance on drinking alcohol? Meaning drinking not to get drunk but having wine with dinner etc.

Great question, but just to tweak it a little, let’s look at the Bible’s stance on drinking alcohol. I don’t want readers to base their beliefs about alcohol usage (or anything else) on my opinions, but on what the Bible says about it.

The Bible does not prohibit Christians from drinking alcohol, only from drunkenness. Christians are not required to partake of alcohol, but may do so in moderation if they like, so long as their use of alcohol does not violate any other Scriptural principles, such as:

Evangelism
Would your drinking alcohol in some way hurt your witness to lost people? If a lost person came to your house and saw alcohol in the fridge, or saw you buying alcohol at the store, or drinking alcohol in a restaurant, would it inhibit your ability to share the gospel with that person due to her perceptions about people who drink alcohol? Could you hand a person a tract with one hand while holding a bottle of beer in the other?

Love for the brotherhood
Do you love your brothers and sisters in Christ enough to deny yourself alcohol if that would set a better example for them, if it would confuse them or cause them to violate their own consciences, or if it would be more conducive to your discipleship of them? There are many people who have had such bad experiences associated with alcohol that your drinking would destroy their trust in, and respect for, you. There are new Christians who aren’t yet mature enough to understand that seeing you – a godly person they look up to – take a drink doesn’t mean that any and all drinking is OK for Christians. Read what Paul had to say about eating meat offered to idols and apply these principles to your consumption of alcohol.

Flaunting Liberty
I occasionally see Christians post pictures of bottles of alcohol, intentionally posed pictures of themselves drinking, and so forth, on social media, and I have to wonder – especially for those who are well aware that this is a difficult issue for many Christians – why? Is it to throw their liberty in the face of other Christians whose consciences prevent them from drinking? Is it to prove a point? Is it a result of being puffed up with the knowledge that they have the liberty to drink? Is it to dare onlookers to take them to task in order to excoriate the person with the Scriptures regarding liberty and alcohol? None of these are godly attitudes.

Authority
Has your husband, employer, school, government, or anyone else in rightful authority over you asked you not to drink? We are to submit to those God has placed in authority over us.

Ambassadorship
Would your drinking in any way tarnish the reputation of Christ, your church, or Christianity as a whole? God is jealous for His holy name, and we are commissioned to represent Him well.

Self Control
One of the fruits of the Spirit is self control. Obviously, if you’re drunk, you’re not really in control of yourself, but there’s another aspect of drinking which requires self control. Are you able to deny yourself your right to have a drink when spiritual concerns, such as the ones mentioned above, outweigh your liberty to imbibe?

Drinking alcohol is a far deeper question than just “Can I or can’t I?” The question we should be asking about drinking (and all other activities) is: “Will doing this further the cause of Christ in my life and the lives of others?”.

Additional Resources:

What does the Bible say about drinking? at Got Questions

Do Not be Drunk with Wine, Part 3 by John MacArthur

Christians and Alcohol by Tim Challies


If you have a question about: a Bible passage, an aspect of theology, a current issue in Christianity, or how to biblically handle a family, life, or church situation, comment below (Iโ€™ll hold all questions in queue {unpublished} for a future edition of The Mailbag) or send me an e-mail or private message. If your question is chosen for publication, your anonymity will be protected.

Mailbag

The Mailbag: Applying Twisted Scripture to Pseudo-“Christian” Events, Ideas, and Fads

Originally published March 7, 2023

The Asbury “revival”. Jesus Revolution. Bethel. The Enneagram. IF:Gathering...

Week after week, we see the ads, the social media posts, and the news stories of the latest, greatest “Christian” thing on the horizon.

Discerning Christians speak up in our churches, with our friends, and on our Facebook pages and rightly warn about the dangerous teachings and agendas these things push.

Other concerned Christians, genuinely fearing the “baby will be thrown out with the bathwater,” push back on those warnings. And sometimes, though they often have the best of intentions, they misapply Scripture or biblical principles to do so.

During the recent furor over the so-called Asbury “revival,” I saw, and was asked about, several of those misapplied Scriptures and principles employed in defense of the idea that we shouldn’t be so quick or so willing to publicly and confidently say something is not of God.

These Scriptures and principles could be applied to a myriad of things past and present, and will surely be employed again the next time a pseudo-“Christian” event, idea, or fad pops up, so let’s take a look at them and untangle them…

These Scriptures and principles will surely be employed again the next time a pseudo-“Christian” event, idea, or fad pops up, so let’s take a look at them and untangle themโ€ฆ


In response to doctrinally sound Christians decrying the Asbury event, one genuinely concerned lady asked:

What about Scripture that says “whoever is not against us is for us” in Mark 9:38-40? How do we apply this? Only God knows their heart, and Iโ€™m sure that people did come to know the Lord because of this.

There are several points in her question I’d like to address:

What about Scripture that says “whoever is not against us is for us” in Mark 9:38-40? How do we apply this?

John said to him, โ€œTeacher, we saw someone casting out demons in your name, and we tried to stop him, because he was not following us.โ€ But Jesus said, โ€œDo not stop him, for no one who does a mighty work in my name will be able soon afterward to speak evil of me. For the one who is not against us is for us.
Mark 9:38-40

Because we know that God’s Word never contradicts itself, and Jesus never contradicted Himself or Scripture during His earthly ministry, we have to understand passages like Mark 9:38-40 within the context of the entirety of the New Testament. In this case, we understand it in light of…

Not everyone who says to me, โ€˜Lord, Lord,โ€™ will enter the kingdom of heaven, but the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven. On that day many will say to me, โ€˜Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name, and cast out demons in your name, and do many mighty works in your name?โ€™ And then will I declare to them, โ€˜I never knew you; depart from me, you workers of lawlessness.โ€™
Matthew 7:21-23 (emphasis added)

โ€ฆand…

“Why do you call me โ€˜Lord, Lord,โ€™ and not do what I tell you?”
Luke 6:46 (emphasis added)

Notice Jesus is the speaker in all three of these passages. Again, Jesus did not contradict Himself during His earthly ministry.

We have to understand that there are a great many people out there who claim to be Christians and who, at first glance, look very much like Christians, but are not living in obedience to Christ, and/or are not teaching what accords with sound doctrine. Scripture calls those people liars and false teachers.

So when Jesus says in Mark 9:38-40 and other passages, that whoever is not against Him is for Him and vice versa, He’s defining “for Him” as someone who’s genuinely regenerated, obedient to Scripture, and teaching sound doctrine. Everybody else, regardless of what they might claim, is against Him according to Scripture.

You might think of it like this. When the disciples came to Jesus and said, “We tried to stop those guys because they aren’t part of our group,” and Jesus said, “Don’t. They’re still ‘with’ us,” it would have been similar to Him saying, “Don’t stop them. They’re doctrinally sound Presbyterians. We’re doctrinally sound Baptists. We preach the same gospel. We’re on the same team.”.

What He would not have been saying would have been something like, “It’s OK that they’re [Catholic, Mormon, prosperity gospel, New Apostolic Reformation, or any other heretical religion that claims to worship Jesus]. They say they love Me, so don’t stop them. Maybe some good will come out of this and a few people will get saved.”

Every week during his pastoral prayer, my pastor leads us to pray for a sister church in the area, and in his prayer, he always says, “Lord, we thank you that we are not the only expression of a Bible believing, God honoring, Christ exalting, Spirit filled church in this area.”

It’s kind of like that.

Only God knows their heart…

That’s not an excuse for failing to exercise discernment as Scripture commands us. God doesn’t require us to know other people’s hearts. He does require us to evaluate their observable behavior and teaching, compare it to Scripture, and stay away from it, warn others about it, and eradicate it from the church if it’s false.

“Only God knows their heart” is not an excuse for failing to exercise discernment as Scripture commands us.

Furthermore, Scripture tells us we do know their hearts:

The good man out of the good treasure of his heart brings forth what is good; and the evil man out of the evil treasure brings forth what is evil. For his mouth speaks from the abundance of his heart.
Luke 6:45

โ€œBeware of the false prophets, who come to you in sheepโ€™s clothing, but inwardly are ravenous wolves. You will know them by their fruits. Are grapes gathered from thorn bushes or figs from thistles? Even so, every good tree bears good fruit, but the bad tree bears bad fruit. A good tree cannot bear bad fruit, nor can a bad tree bear good fruit. Every tree that does not bear good fruit is cut down and thrown into the fire. So then, you will know them by their fruits.
Matthew 7:15-20

And by this we know that we have come to know Him, if we keep His commandments. The one who says, โ€œI have come to know Him,โ€ and does not keep His commandments, is a liar, and the truth is not in him; but whoever keeps His word, truly in him the love of God has been perfected. By this we know that we are in Him: the one who says he abides in Him ought himself to walk in the same manner as He walked.
1 John 2:3-6

We can’t read people’s minds, but we certainly can know their hearts when their words and actions demonstrate what’s in their hearts.

…and Iโ€™m sure that people did come to know the Lord because of this.

1. That’s speculation on your part. Is it possible some people did get genuinely saved at this event? Yes, but we don’t have any proof of that. It’s an assumption.

2. The only way someone could have gotten saved at this event is if she heard the biblical gospel of law and grace, sin and repentance, and Jesus’ vicarious life, death, burial, and resurrection explicitly preached or explained. Here’s the biblical gospel. Was it proclaimed and explained at this event? If not, no salvations took place.

3. That idea is pragmatism. People come to Christ in all sorts of horrible situations and under all sorts of horrible teaching. People came to Christ in concentration camps, while they were still Muslims, in Catholic “churches,” while working as prostitutes, while practicing homosexuality, etc. The fact that people get saved while in those horrible situations or under that horrible teaching doesn’t magically make those situations and that teaching good. It means that God is so good and powerful and merciful that, through the power of His Word, He can save someone out of those situations and teaching.


But if even one person got saved, wasn’t it worth it?

Let me begin my answer to that question with another question.

Did you know that several medical procedures that have saved the lives of many people were discovered in World War II concentration camps by performing torturous experiments on inmates? Does the fact that those medical procedures have helped so many people justify the torture the Nazis inflicted on their victims?

Of course it doesn’t. Neither does one person (or even a bunch of people) getting saved excuse, nullify, justify, or make sin and false teaching “worth it”.

Stop and take a few moments to meditate on how high, and holy, and worthy of all honor, glory, majesty, praise, and reverence is God, the almighty King of the universe. Think about the excruciating pain Jesus went through on the cross, and the agony of having every drop of God’s wrath against sin poured out on Him. So that He might bear your sin and mine. So that we could be forgiven and free and saved from an eternity in Hell.

How could we ever say that the sewer slime of committing any sin against that God is “worth it,” no matter what the outcome might be?

No. A blasphemy-fest isn’t “worth it”. God doesn’t consider false teaching “worth it” if someone gets saved. He’s perfectly capable of saving everyone He means to save without such events.


You discerning Christians speaking out against this event should just back off like Gamaliel suggested in Acts 5 and let it play out. If it’s not of God, it will come to nothing.

So in the present case I tell you, keep away from these men and let them alone, for if this plan or this undertaking is of man, it will fail; but if it is of God, you will not be able to overthrow them. You might even be found opposing God!โ€
Acts 5:38-39

{Be sure to read that passage in its entirety (Acts 5:17-42), so you can get the context and all the details.}

Sisters, we’ve got to get it through our heads that the book of Acts is largely historical narrative like Genesis or Judges or Nehemiah. Not only that, it is also a historical narrative of transition from Old Testament Judaism to New Testament Christianity. Many of the things we read about in Acts are not to be understood as normative of, or instruction to the church today. (Those sorts of things are mainly in the pastoral epistles – 1&2 Timothy and Titus.)

Such is the case with the Gamaliel passage in Acts 5. This is a descriptive passage (it simply tells us what happened), not a prescriptive passage (instructions for us to follow). And be thankful for that, because the disciples get beaten a lot in Acts 5.

Nowhere in God’s didactic instruction to the New Testament church does He tell us to back off an event or teacher that claims to be “Christian” and just let things play out. Nowhere. Instead, we repeatedly see instruction throughout the New Testament (and even the Old Testament) to be wise and discerning, test the spirits, and have nothing to do with false teachers, either as individuals or the church.

We also have to take into account that Gamaliel was a Pharisee who was still hanging out with the rest of the Council. Know what that means? He wasn’t a Believer. You take Gamaliel’s advice, and you’re taking the advice of a lost person – over God’s instructions – about how to handle a situation in the church.

Gamaliel is not the hero of this story. If he were, he would have believed the gospel the disciples proclaimed, and prevented the Council from beating them and forbidding them to preach. And he probably would have suffered the same consequences the disciples suffered.

Gamaliel isn’t the hero of this story. If he were, he’d have believed the gospel the disciples proclaimed, and prevented them from being beaten & forbidden to preach. And he probably would have suffered the same fate as the disciples.

Finally, though Gamaliel, in his limited experience, could cite a couple of instances in which this rubric seemed to work, we have the advantage of looking back across much more history, over many more years, and in many more places, and we can see that his advice doesn’t always work. How long has Islam been hanging around? Hinduism? Mormonism? Buddhism? Catholicism? Certainly none of those religious movements are of God, and still, here they all are.

Don’t take Gamaliel’s advice in these situations, submit to God’s instructions to the church.


Be careful that you are not calling what is of God as not. Very serious thing to do.

It may not always be meant this way, but this kind of warning can come across as a veiled threat.

Be careful you are not calling something “of God” when it is not. That is also a very serious thing to do, especially if what you’re basing your conclusion on is your feelings, opinions, experiences, and out of context, misapplied Scripture, rather than on rightly handled, in context Scripture.


God can bring good out of anything!

Of course He can. God is out for His glory and the good of His people. But that doesn’t make the situation or false teaching itself good or excusable or that we shouldn’t warn against it if it’s bad. Scripture says the opposite.

When God sovereignly brings something good and holy out of a bad or sinful situation, it doesn’t mean that bad or sinful situation is good and holy. It means God is good and holy.

For example: A Mormon who studies her Bible and/or is evangelized can get genuinely saved while still in Mormonism. (And God will save her out of Mormonism.) That doesn’t make Mormonism Christian or good or biblical. That means God is good and merciful and kind.

When God sovereignly brings something good and holy out of a bad or sinful situation, it doesn’t mean that bad or sinful *situation* is good and holy. It means *God* is good and holy.

Be ready. The next “Christian” thing is just around the corner. Study your Bible and be prepared to correctly apply rightly handled Scripture as you carefully evaluate it according to God’s Word.


If you have a question about: a Bible passage, an aspect of theology, a current issue in Christianity, or how to biblically handle a family, life, or church situation, comment below (Iโ€™ll hold all questions in queue {unpublished} for a future edition of The Mailbag) or send me an e-mail or private message. If your question is chosen for publication, your anonymity will be protected.

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The Mailbag: Is It OK for Christian Women to Wear Bikinis?

It’s that time of year again, ladies.๐Ÿ™‚

Originally published February 27, 2017


Foreword: I re-run this article every year in late winter / early spring. And every year, there are a handful of my followers who get mad that I don’t simply say, “No. It is not OK for Christian women to wear bikinis.”

If you’re one of those people, you’re missing the point of this article.

It’s easy to throw out a hard and fast law. It’s not so easy – especially for new Christians and those who come from a background of legalism – to practice biblical decision-making, a skill all Christians need to hone and implement in every area of our lives.

This article is a teaching moment. It’s an opportunity for women to take a fairly easy question that they pretty much already know the answer to and learn how to go through the steps to arriving at a biblical answer.

Remember back in school when your math teacher would make you show your work? She did that because getting the right answer is only a part of problem solving. Understanding and correctly doing all the steps – in order – to arrive at the right answer is the bulk of what she was trying to teach you. This is a “show your work” kind of article.


Summer is just around the corner, so a lot of women will soon be shopping for swimwear. With regard to modesty- do you think it’s OK for Christian women to wear bikinis?

I’m trying to remember back to the days when I might have actually considered – without doubling over in laughter – wearing a bikini. It was a really long time ago. Young, svelte sisters, if I may bring you a bit of comfort- you won’t have to grapple with this question for the rest of your life. As your other older sisters and I can attest, one day, age-appropriateness, your figure, sun exposure, and the desire not to frighten people will make this decision for you long before you have to consider modesty as part of the equation. It’s one of the blessings of getting older.

Just to make sure we’re all on the same page here, let’s quickly define our terms. When I say “bikini,” I’m talking about the fabric equivalent of a bra and panties, not swimwear that covers a lot more yet comes in two pieces.

bikini

not bikinis

Generally speaking, I don’t think bikinis are wise in public unless you’re wearing a shirt or some kind of cover up over it. I’m reluctant to make a hard and fast law about it, though, because, as I’m sure you’re aware, the Bible doesn’t say “Thou shalt not wear a bikini.” (My husband would like to chime in here and says, “However, if you and your husband have a private place for just the two of you to swim or sunbathe, go for it!” You’re welcome, guys.)

A law is a fast and easy “yes” or “no” answer to our question- which is often what our flesh wants, because our flesh is lazy.

As with various other issues, the Bible gives us a general principle (in this case about dressing modestly) and we work out our own salvation in our own cultural context according to all pertinent biblical principles and our own consciences. A law is a fast and easy “yes” or “no” answer to our question- which is often what our flesh wants, because our flesh is lazy. But what God wants Christians to do is study His Word about the issue, pray, and ask Him for wisdom to make a godly decision. When we work through this process, it helps us to develop a greater desire to be conformed to the image of Christ and to be obedient to Him.

What God wants Christians to do is study His Word about the issue, pray, and ask Him for wisdom to make a godly decision.

Let’s take a look at just one passage of Scripture that could be helpful in this regard:

3Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. 4Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. 5Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, 6who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, 7but emptied himself, by taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. 8And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross.
Philippians 2:3-8 

So, at first glance, you might wonder, “What in the world does this passage have to do with wearing a bikini?” It doesn’t have anything to do with the bikini itself, it zeros in on your heart (Why do you want to wear a bikini?) and your sanctification (Will wearing a bikini make me more Christlike?).

Verse 3a:
Examine your heart- could your motive for wearing a bikini be classified as selfish ambition or vain conceit? Is it possible you want to show your body off to men to appear desirable, or to women to make them jealous?

Verse 3b-4:
Is this a situation in which you should humble yourself and put the interests of those men who might be tempted to lust or those women who might be tempted to covet ahead of your own desire to appear attractive?

Verse 5:
Do you truly desire to have the same mindset as Christ- about this issue and all others?

Verse 6-8:
How did Jesus approach life, according to these verses? He set aside His own rights and privileges (6), He took on the role of a servant (7), He humbled Himself and was obedient to the point of death (8).

When it comes to wearing a bikini, are you willing to have the same mindset as Christ? To set aside your own rights and privileges, be a servant to others, humble yourself, and obey Christ even to the point of death?

These are not questions God wants me to answer for you. These are questions He wants you to come to Him and answer, because He wants your heart. And He wants you to examine your heart and see if it belongs to Him in this area.

Additional Resources:

Is it Okay for Christian Women to Wear Bikinis? at When We Understand the Text

Modesty, parts 1, 2, & 3 at A Word Fitly Spoken

If you’re looking for modest swimwear – even swim dresses – there are several online companies, such as Calypsa, that may have what you’re looking for. Try searching “modest swimwear”. Have you already found a great company you love? Suggest it in the comments below!


If you have a question about: a Bible passage, an aspect of theology, a current issue in Christianity, or how to biblically handle a family, life, or church situation, comment below (Iโ€™ll hold all questions in queue {unpublished} for a future edition of The Mailbag) or send me an e-mail or private message. If your question is chosen for publication, your anonymity will be protected.

Bible Study, Mailbag

The Mailbag: As a newly doctrinally sound Christian, should I stop journaling? (How to journal biblically.)

Originally published April 2, 2018

I recently posted this on social media:

I just finished filling up another Bible study journal. My oldest one goes back to June 2002 – nearly 24 years ago. My second to last child was two months old then, and now all three of my grandbabies are older than that. A few years are missing. Probably the years I read through the Bible in a year. I don’t usually journal that. A handful of the oldest entries have quotes from Joyce Meyer, Russell Moore, Matt Chandler, and Experiencing God – people I wouldn’t touch with a 10 foot pole now, because either they, or I, changed. It is incredible to look back over God’s faithfulness and see how much He has grown me over the years. Taking notes during your Bible study time: ๐Ÿ’ฏ would recommend. Show me your journal in the comments if you like!

In response, a few ladies asked some questions about how to take notes on the text of Scripture and what sorts of things to write down. My answer was similar to what I’ve written in this article, so I thought it might be time to re-run it…


I just read your January 9th blog on Careyโ€™s story. That is me regarding the journaling. I have journaled for 10 years and have saved them all. Now I donโ€™t know if I should stop altogether. I already threw out all my Sarah Young books, Beth Moore, Lysa, etc. Itโ€™s like Iโ€™m starting over after 32 years as a Christian. I just found you this week through Justin Peters and Iโ€™m so grateful. So should I stop journaling too? I did automatic writing- ugg!

Don’t we serve a wonderful God? His mercies are not only new every morning, they are new even after 32 years! I’m so thrilled for you that God has opened your eyes and given you a fresh start. (P.S. Stick with Justin’s stuff. He is awesome.)

The word “journaling” gets tossed around a lot these days. Coloring in your Bible has come to be known as “Bible art journaling”. Then there’s the type of mystical or contemplative “journaling” you’ve touched on which can include automatic writing (one of the reasons Sarah Young’s Jesus Calling is false doctrine and should be avoided like the Plague).

But there is a type of journaling you can do in conjunction with your personal Bible study and prayer time which is perfectly biblical. If it would help you to differentiate this type of biblical journaling from the mystical journaling you’ve done in the past, you might want to call it “taking notes” or “written Bible study” or something like that, instead. But if you need to put some time and space between the unbiblical type of journaling you used to do and beginning to journal again in a biblical way, it’s perfectly OK to take as long of a break from journaling as you need.

When it comes to journaling in a biblical way, it might help to look at studying the Bible through the lens of studying for a college class.

A lot of students go into college thinking that all they need to do is show up for class, write down whatever the teacher says will be on the test, read the chapter, and they’ll learn what they need to learn. But if you go through freshman orientation or take a study skills class, one of the learning strategies you’ll be taught is how to study your textbook.

First of all, you read the material in an organized way. Most people going to college don’t have to be told this, but when you sit down to study, say, a history book, you start at the beginning of the book and you work your way through to the end. You don’t start by reading two paragraphs out of the middle of chapter 7, then move on to the last three sentences of chapter 49, then the first half of chapter 1.

Do you see where I’m going with this? That’s how people โ€œstudyโ€ the Bible sometimes, and it’s just as crazy to study the Bible that way as it would be to study a history book, or math book, or science book that way.

So you’re reading along in an organized way. Take notes. Write down any questions you might have about the text, words you need to look up, etc. Write down what you learn about God from that text, or how the characters in that text set an example for you of something you should or shouldnโ€™t do. Write down any commands from the text that you need to obey. Write down how the passage points to Christ. Write down anything the text reminds you to pray about. Write down anything God is convicting you about as you read the text. Write down any practical applications the text has for situations in your life. Write down a careful summary of the text. Write down any other Scriptures the text youโ€™re reading reminds you of.

You might want to highlight or underline things in your Bible that you want to remember.

As you’re studying your Bible you’ll probably notice some footnotes. Take a look at those footnotes and see if there are any cross-references listed. A cross reference is a Scripture that’s related to the Scripture you’re reading that might help explain it a little bit better. So look up those cross-references and maybe make some notes on them.

This kind of “journaling” can be very helpful as you study your Bible. You might also want to jot down anything you’re praying about and, later, how God answers. You could include any notes you take on your pastor’s sermons or points you want to remember from the Sunday School lesson. Keeping these journals and looking back over them from time to time is an excellent way to see how God is growing you in the knowledge of His Word, your trust in Him, and your obedience.

If writing is the way you best process your thoughts and the information you’re learning, then by all means, continue journaling! Just make sure you’re doing it in a biblical way.


Additional Resources:

10 Simple Steps to Plain Vanilla Bible Study

Rightly Dividing: 12 Doโ€™s and Donโ€™ts for Effective Bible Study

Bible Study Articles and Resources

Bible Studies


If you have a question about: a Bible passage, an aspect of theology, a current issue in Christianity, or how to biblically handle a family, life, or church situation, comment below (Iโ€™ll hold all questions in queue {unpublished} for a future edition of The Mailbag) or send me an e-mail or private message. If your question is chosen for publication, your anonymity will be protected.

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The Mailbag: Communion Questions

Originally published June 20, 2023

Is it biblical for women to administer communion to other women in a local church or a parachurch ladies gathering? It it biblical for a couple to administer communion at a social gathering in their home?

Communion.. the Lord’s Supper… the Lord’s Table… the breaking of bread and drinking of wine (or grape juice) as a memorial to our Lord’s suffering and death is an extremely solemn and serious ordinance of the church.

I mean, in the Corinthian church, people were getting sick and dying because they weren’t handling the Lord’s Supper in a godly way.

Whoever, therefore, eats the bread or drinks the cup of the Lord in an unworthy manner will be guilty concerning the body and blood of the Lord. Let a person examine himself, then, and so eat of the bread and drink of the cup. For anyone who eats and drinks without discerning the body eats and drinks judgment on himself. That is why many of you are weak and ill, and some have died.
1 Corinthians 11:27-30

Take a moment and meditate on what that means. How seriously does God take the Lord’s Supper?

The Lord’s Supper is an ordinance of the gathered church, just like baptism is. You wouldn’t (I hope) baptize people at your Tupperware party or even your weekly women’s Bible study, and you shouldn’t be observing the Lord’s Supper in those sorts of venues either.

Look at the language in 1 Corinthians 11:17-34 and how it differentiates between eating outside the church gathering (at home) and partaking of the Lord’s Supper inside the worship gathering of the church. The language assumes that the Lord’s Supper takes place in the church gathering: “When you come together…” (17, 20), “When you come together as a church…” (18), “Do you not have houses to eat and drink in? Or do you despise the church of God…” (22), “when you come together to eat” (33), “if anyone is hungry, let him eat at homeโ€”so that when you come together…” (34).

When you unbiblically remove the Lord’s Supper from the worship gathering of the church body, you immediately cheapen it. It becomes lesser. Just some little thing we do so we can feel like we’re being holy, or because we crave ritual. It’s reduced to the level of hors d’oeuvres or a party game. The purpose of the Lord’s Supper is for the gathered church to proclaim the Lord’s death until he comes (26).

And because it is an ordinance of the church, those who shepherd the church – pastors and elders – are responsible for administering it in a biblical way. That responsibility has not been given to any Tom, Dick, and Harry (or Dawn, Pat, and Mary, if you will) who decides he or she wants to offer it at a private shindig. It is a pastoral responsibility, which includes fencing the table.

So the answer to all of your questions is no. The Lord’s Supper should not be observed at parachurch meetings or social gatherings at all. (Or weddings. You didn’t ask about that, but I’m going to throw that in there, too, for the same reasons.) And the only reason I can think of that a church would have women administering the Lord’s Supper during a worship service instead of the pastor, elders, and/or deacons is either to appear egalitarian or because they are egalitarian, so that’s a “no” too.


What about situations like COVID, when the church can’t gather? Is “online communion” (taking the Lord’s Supper at home with whatever elements I have on hand while watching the pastor “administer” it online) OK?

No. First of all, as we learned from COVID, while there may be very temporary emergencies, the church can gather if it is being obedient to the Lord. Sometimes obedience is costly, but it can be done. Just ask our Savior, whose obedience cost Him torture and death.

Second, there’s no requirement for how often the church must observe the Lord’s Supper. Jesus said “as often as you do this,” not “every week” or “twice a month”. Once the temporary emergency is over the church can come back together and observe the Lord’s Supper as a body, in person, as indicated by Scripture.


“What about homebound, hospitalized, or dying people who are Providentially hindered from gathering with the church? Can a pastor administer the Lord’s Supper to those people outside the church gathering?”

I would leave that to a pastor’s discretion, but, if I were a pastor, I would be very reluctant to do so. Personally, I would urge those people, as well as anyone else who wants to observe the Lord’s Supper outside of the gathering of the church body to consider why they want to do that. I mean, dig deep and do some serious introspection about your reasons and what you actually believe about the Lord’s Supper.

I suspect some Christians, without even realizing it, may hold some Roman Catholic-adjacent or superstitious beliefs about the Lord’s Supper.

It’s not the thing you do right before you die (or any time) to make you right with God, forgive your sins, or secure your place in Heaven. That’s what Christ’s death, burial, and resurrection were for. And if you’re placing your faith for any of those things in partaking of the Lord’s Supper instead of, or in addition to Christ’s finished work on the cross, that’s idolatry.

It’s not something you do to assuage misplaced guilt about not being physically able to attend church (or, for that matter, to assuage appropriate guilt about forsaking the assembly when you actually could be there). If you are legitimately Providentially hindered from faithful church attendance, God knows that. He’s the One who allowed or placed you in that situation in the first place. You don’t need to “make it up to Him” or try to get “back” into His good graces by performing for Him by partaking of the Lord’s Supper. Rest. Rest in His grace, mercy, and divine Providence. You can partake when you’re able to go back to church, or when the whole church is one day gathered for the marriage supper of the Lamb.

It’s not something you do to somehow conjure up or invoke God’s presence into your midst. That’s a variant of necromancy or witchcraft. God is omnipresent. There’s not a millimeter of the universe in which He is not present. He’s at your social gathering. He’s at your parachurch meeting. What you want to do at those events is to pray, not observe the Lord’s Supper. In prayer, you recognize God’s presence, submit yourselves and your gathering to Him, and ask Him to guide your meeting. And, no, observing the Lord’s Supper isn’t “leveling up” on “just prayer”. Prayer and the Lord’s Supper are two different worship practices with two different purposes.

And, finally, the Lord’s Supper isn’t something you do to secure God’s blessing on whatever activity or venue you’re observing it in. It’s not a talisman. It’s not like rubbing a rabbit’s foot for luck or a baseball player going through his superstitious pre-game rituals so he’ll play well and win the game. Participating in the Lord’s Supper with your church family is a blessing – it’s the blessing of unity in Christ and the fellowship of proclaiming His death together until He comes, but you don’t do it to get God’s blessing on your marriage, your dinner party, or your pro-life meeting.


What would you say to a church not using unleavened bread for communion? The last time we took communion the bread was Italian bread, obviously had yeast in it. I donโ€™t want to take the Lords supper with bread with yeast in it because yeast represents sin and Jesus has no sin in Him, and if we are to remember what He did, how can we use just regular bread. I did ask the pastor, he thought I had a good point, but I havenโ€™t heard from him yet.

It’s great that you asked your pastor about this. That’s exactly what I would have advised you to do. I would encourage you to submit to his leadership on this issue.

Leavened bread is not a reason to abstain from the Lord’s Supper any more than grape juice instead of wine (or vice versa) is a reason to abstain. My personal opinion (not biblical mandate) is that unleavened bread and wine should be used because they are more historically accurate and truer to the details of Scripture than leavened bread and/or grape juice. That being said, I’ve never been a member of a church that didn’t use grape juice, and I have participated in observances of the Lord’s Supper that used leavened bread, and it didn’t bother me in the least.

We need to remember that the reason unleavened bread was used was not because leaven represented sin, although we do see that symbolism later, but because the Lord’s Supper began as the Last Supper, which was an observance of Passover. Unleavened bread was used for Passover because it memorialized the Israelites’ flight from Egypt. They did not have time for the dough to rise before the exodus. That’s where the unleavened bread for Passover, the Last Supper, and the Lord’s Supper came from. It had nothing to do with Jesus’ sinlessness because Jesus had not yet come at the time of the exodus.

We can also remember that Jesus used leavened bread when He fed the 5000, and in that very context of leavened bread, He Himself said, “I am the bread of life.” If leaven always represents sin, why would Jesus, who was sinless God, have referred to Himself in the context of everyday leavened bread?

If leavened bread is the only reason you’re abstaining from the Lord’s Supper, I would encourage you to stop abstaining and partake joyfully with your church family, proclaiming the Lord’s death until He comes.


We recently moved and have been attending a Southern Baptist church. They have not had communion for over two months. Isn’t it the norm to have communion at least once a month? since we are new to this church we are still waiting and learning our place. We hesitate to make ourselves known as possibly unsubmissive or question why they do things the way they do. (From The Mailbag: Potpourri (…SBC Communion…))

These are such great questions because they help me, as a Southern Baptist, think about the way we do things and how those practices might be perceived by visitors or new members.

Every Southern Baptist church is autonomous, so each church has its own policy or practice about how often the Lord’s Supper is observed. There are some SBC churches who hold the Lord’s Supper every week and probably others who hold it only once or twice a year, although I don’t personally know of any who hold it that infrequently.

In my experience, most Southern Baptist churches observe the Lord’s Supper several times a year, usually on a schedule like the first Sunday of the month, once a quarter, or every “fifth Sunday” (in months that have five Sundays). In addition to these scheduled observances, many churches also observe the Lord’s Supper at their Christmas Eve, Good Friday, or Easter service.

I would encourage you and your husband to set up an appointment with the pastor and ask away! It is certainly not unsubmissive to sit in his office and politely say, “We’re new here and we were just wondering about…” Most pastors I know would love for potential members to do this.


We run into trouble when we start trying to “improve” on God’s Word and His ways. The Lord’s Supper is an ordinance of the church, to be observed in the gathering of the church body, and to be rightly administered by the pastor, elders, and/or deacons. Let’s leave it at that – nothing more, nothing less – right where Scripture leaves it.

Additional Resources:

The Last Supper ~ The Lord’s Supper


If you have a question about: a Bible passage, an aspect of theology, a current issue in Christianity, or how to biblically handle a family, life, or church situation, comment below (Iโ€™ll hold all questions in queue {unpublished} for a future edition of The Mailbag) or send me an e-mail or private message. If your question is chosen for publication, your anonymity will be protected.