Category: Holidays (Other)

Holidays (Other)

50 Ways to Have a Happy (and Holy) Valentine’s Day

Michelle Lesley

The world has all kinds of ideas about how you and your “significant other” should spend Valentine’s Day. Some aren’t too bad, but others are downright depraved. Want some ideas of things you and your husband, kids, friends, or church family can do together instead?1
How about these? Have fun!

Want some ideas of things you and your husband, kids, friends, or church family can do together on Valentine’s Day? Check these out!

1. Invite your Sunday School class or small group over for desserts and fellowship.

2. Snuggle up under the covers and read the Old Testament book of Song of Solomon with your husband.

3. Have a get together with your single friends.

4. Visit a local tourist attraction you’ve never been to before.

5. Volunteer at a crisis pregnancy center.

6. Go antiquing.

7. Go on a miniature golf date with your husband.

8. Have a snowball fight- parents versus kids.

9. Invite another couple to go to a canvas painting place.

10. Play Twister.

11. Re-read your favorite book.

12. Go for a mother-daughter mani/pedi.

13. Fingerpaint with the kids.

14. Take a nap.

15. Cook dinner with your husband.

16. Plan a family game night.

17. Have a pillow fight.

18. Go shopping with the girls.

19. Schedule a family photo session.

20. Roast marshmallows over the fire.

21. Bake cookies for some of the shut-ins in your church.

22. Trade skills. Teach your husband how to do a small task he doesn’t know how to do (make a pie crust, fold a fitted sheet…) and let him teach you how to do something (change a tire, tie a tie…).

23. Play frisbee at the park as a family.

24. Play with your pet.

25. Hand out tracts and share the gospel at the mall.

26. Babysit for a single mom.

27.Get out the play dough and play with the kids.

28. Plan a family hike.

29. Host a Bible study in your home.

30. Get the whole family cuddled up on the couch and take turns with your husband telling “when I was a kid” stories to the kids.

31. Clean out a closet.

32. Watch a (clean) romantic movie with your husband.

33. Have a family haiku-writing contest.

34. Play video games with the kids.

35. Jump on a trampoline.

36. Invite a couple for dinner that you and your husband would like to get to know better.

37. Binge watch your favorite classic TV series.

38. Pray for and write a letter to a missionary as a family.

39. Check out a class or community event at your local library.

40. Plan a family vacation.

41. Look up and read every Bible verse with the word love in it.

42. Get some friends together to sing a few hymns at a nursing home.

43. Write and exchange love letters with your husband.

44. Have a tickle fight.

45. Go out to dinner at a restaurant you’ve never tried before.

46. Get a facial.

47. Gather some girlfriends and volunteer at a battered women’s shelter.

48. Get a couple’s massage.

49. Flip through old photo albums with the kids.

50. Take a bubble bath.

What are some other fun
Valentine’s activities you can think of?

1Yes, I realize Valentine’s Day falls on a Sunday this year and that many of us will be in church most of the day. Some of us don’t have Sunday afternoon/evening activities at our churches and could do one of these activities later in the day, and those who do have Sunday obligations might choose to celebrate with one of these activities on another day.

Gratitude, Holidays (Other), Mailbag, Thanks/Thanksgiving

The Mailbag: When Negative Nelly Comes to Thanksgiving Dinner

Michelle Lesley

What are some ways we can remain thankful when dealing with a family member that is quite often a “negative nelly”?

Thanksgiving is just around the corner, and for most of us, that means spending time with family members. Family members who sometimes rub us the wrong way. How to maintain an attitude of gratitude while Negative Nellie natters on? Try this:

1. Remember that God created Nellie in His image just like He created you, and keep that thought pinned to the front of your brain whenever you’re engaged in conversation with her. This is someone God loves, and He desires for her to know Him, despite all her faults and foibles, the very same way God loves you and desires for you to know Him.

2. And right next to that first thought at the front of your brain, pin this one up too:

And as you wish that others would do to you, do so to them.
Luke 6:31

It’s the Golden Rule we’ve been hearing since childhood: “Treat other people the way you would want to be treated.” Although I frequently fail at carrying out this command, one thing that helps me is to remember that for every person who gets on my nerves, there are probably ten people whose nerves I’m getting on. How would I want those people to treat me?

3. The more people I talk to, the more I’m convinced that the longing of many folks’ hearts is just to be heard. We don’t take a lot of time to simply sit and listen to others any more. That leaves many people feeling lonely and invisible. Sometimes the best way we can show someone she is loved is just to hear her out.

Additionally, taking the time to listen to someone benefits you in a couple of ways.

First, you might gain some insight into why Nellie is constantly complaining or pessimistic. Maybe she’s lonely, or in a lot of pain from an illness, or there are problems in her marriage. If you get a better grip on what the underlying problems are, maybe there’s a way you could serve her, help her, counsel her, or pray for her.

Second, when you invest time in listening to someone, she’s much more likely to listen to you when you speak to her. (Which, of course, should not be your main motivation for listening to her.) And that means you’ll hopefully have a much more receptive audience with her when you…

4. Share the gospel with Nellie. If she’s lost, that’s one of the reasons she’s being negative. She’s burdened down with sin and its consequences and she doesn’t have the hope, joy, and peace that only Christ can give. Be kind, compassionate, and understanding, and steer the conversation toward the cross.

5. Pray three ways:

•If you know you’re going to be seeing Nellie at Thanksgiving dinner, start praying for her, the needs in her life, and how you can minister to her, now. It will prepare your heart for interacting with her, it will change your heart attitude toward her, and it will help you to continue being thankful instead of getting bogged down in Nellie’s negativity.

•Stay thankful by offering a silent prayer of gratitude to God whenever Nellie starts nay-saying. Thank Him for giving you the opportunity to minister to her, thank Him for protecting you from whatever circumstances she’s complaining about, thank Him for her.

•If Nellie has been going on in a negative vein for a while, take a moment when she pauses to offer a few genuine words of kindness and compassion and then ask if you can pray for her about the situation, right there, right then. Don’t do this often enough to be annoying, but do it more than once, if the opportunity presents itself. She will either be touched by your compassion and reminded to be thankful instead of grousing, or she may be averse to the idea and stop complaining to you so you won’t keep asking to pray for her. Either way, win-win. (And, of course, you can still pray for her in your heart.)

6. Set an example of thankfulness. Before Nellie even has a chance to open her mouth in negativity, you start – and set the tone for – the conversation. Tell her the latest in your life and remark on what you were thankful for in that circumstance. When someone else, or even Nellie, is telling her story, gently “bring out the blessing” in her tale: “Wow, God was so good to heal you from that cold!” “How wonderful that your son took the time out of his busy schedule to come visit you!” “I know how annoying it is when your cat runs away, but it’s so awesome that your neighbor found her and brought her back to you!”.

7. If Nellie is a Believer, it might be time for a gentle, biblical rebuke and encouragement to thankfulness. You’ll have to be extra vigilant to use godly wisdom in doing this at a family gathering (and you may want to just wait until after the holidays), choosing just the right moment, being careful to speak to Nellie privately and to cloak your words in kindness and understanding (see #2). (Also, keep in mind that sometimes the things we do are so habitual we don’t even realize we’re doing them. She might be totally clueless that she’s constantly complaining or looking at every glass as half-empty.) A great way to start a conversation like this is with a few questions. You might say something like this:

Nellie, I was just wondering, are you doing OK?

Of course. Why do you ask?

Well, from the things you’ve been telling me (cite an example or two) – maybe you don’t even realize this – but it sounds like you might be struggling a little with joy and thankfulness. Is there anything I can do to help? Any way I can pray for you? As your sister in Christ, I love you and I want to be an encouragement to you. I’m concerned that you might be experiencing some bitterness or discontent in your heart, and I just wanted to step in, offer you some love, help, and encouragement, and hopefully help you keep that bitterness from taking root. I want that joy and peace for you that are ours in Christ Jesus. I want you to be able to give thanks in all circumstances. Is there any way I could be helpful to you with that?

It can be difficult, depressing, and frustrating to be around someone who always sees the black cloud behind the silver lining. But if we keep in mind that, as Believers, it’s really not about our feelings of discomfort, it’s about God presenting us with an opportunity to show love and minister the gospel to someone, we can face those negative nellies in our lives with a whole new Christ-centered perspective. Happy Thanksgiving!

If you have a question about: a Bible passage, an aspect of theology, a current issue in Christianity, or how to biblically handle a family, life, or church situation, comment below (I’ll hold all questions in queue {unpublished} for a future edition of The Mailbag) or send me an e-mail or private message. If your question is chosen for publication, your anonymity will be protected.

Guest Posts, Holidays (Other), Reformation Day

Guest Post: The Reformation – An Invitation to the Gospel

Michelle Lesley

If your theology pretty much matches up with mine (as outlined in the “Welcome” and “Statement of Faith” tabs) and you’d like to contribute a guest post, drop me an e-mail at MichelleLesley1@yahoo.com,
and let’s chat about it.

The Reformation: An Invitation to the Gospel
by Matt Shown

For most, October 31 is about costumes and candy. But something far more frightening and weighty is also celebrated on that day. October 31 is Reformation Day. On October 31, 1517, a hammer strike would echo through centuries – in fact, the echo is still reverberating today. In 1517, Martin Luther would nail his ninety-five theses to the church door in Wittenberg, Germany sparking the Protestant Reformation that shaped Christian history.

The Reformers sought to bring the church back under the authority of God’s Word. This wasn’t to say tradition had no value, but rather that the sole “God-breathed” authority for any believer was not the word of Popes or councils, but the words of the Bible. The Reformers echoed the conviction of Jesus when He responded to the Sadducees in His day, “Have you not read what was said to you by God?” (Matthew 22:31). The words on the pages of Scriptures were God’s very Word- God breathed and sufficient to equip believers to do every good work (2 Timothy 3:16-17). Sola Scriptura – that Scripture alone is the supreme authority for faith and practice was the formal, or foundational, principle that sparked the Reformation.

But there was a second principle – a material principle- that dealt with the content of the gospel. This material principle was called sola fide. Sola fide was the confession that faith alone was the way in which mankind can be in right relationship with God. By grace alone through faith alone in Jesus Christ alone mankind can be justified, which means to be set in a right relationship with God. Romans 4:5 tells us, “And to the one who does not work but believes in him who justifies the ungodly, his faith is counted as righteousness.” John 3:16, the most popular verse in the Bible, reminds us, “For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life.”

Many misunderstand what sola fide means because we misunderstand what faith is. Faith is not a blind leap into the dark. Faith isn’t separate from repentance of sin (Mark 1:15). Faith isn’t simply beliefs in our head, but transformation of our head, heart, and will. Biblical faith is conviction rooted in assurance (Hebrews 11:1, Romans 4:21). It isn’t the empty profession that James 2 illustrates. Faith isn’t walking an aisle at church on Sunday and walking in darkness Monday through Saturday. Saving faith is conviction rooted in assurance that God’s Word is true. It is marked by a transformation of self (2 Corinthians 5:17).

Jesus illustrates saving faith in parable about a tax collector and the Pharisee. Luke tells us he told this parable to those who trusted in themselves that they were righteous, and we may be surprised what self-righteousness looks like. Both men entered the temple to pray, and the Pharisee gave lip service to God’s grace, “God, I thank you that I am not like other men, extortioners, unjust, adulterers, or even like this tax collector. I fast twice a week; I give tithes of all that I get” (Luke 18:11-12). He recognizes God’s grace, yet ultimately found hope in his own works. While the tax collector displays reverence toward God by bowing his head and praying a simple prayer, “God, be merciful to me, a sinner!” The Pharisee recognizes God’s grace, the tax collector relied on it. It was the one who relied on God’s grace, through faith, that went home justified, not the man who simply gave lip service to grace while trusting in himself.

This is an illustration of why the Reformation matters. The church was making men into Pharisees rather than into justified tax collectors. The message of the Reformation was to cease simply recognizing grace, and to instead rely on it. The message was a confession of mankind’s ungodliness, God’s incomprehensible holiness, and the sufficiency of Jesus’ cross and empty tomb to save!

The Reformation is an opportunity to, by faith alone, rely on God’s grace. It is an opportunity to trust the promises of God in His Word because the Bible is enough for us. It is an opportunity to let go of unbiblical traditions and to embrace the apostolic traditions found in the pages of God’s Word. The Reformation is an invitation to the reader who may not have assurance of their relationship with God. It is an invitation to assurance through faith in Jesus Christ.

“How can I be right with God?” There is no more important question. It is that question that ignited the Reformation and it is a question all of us must answer.

Matt Shown has served as a bi-vocational pastor and church revitalizer for the past 4 1/2 years. He loves God’s Word, good preaching, and Mac N Cheese. He is married to his incredible wife Dana. Matt received his Master of Divinity degree from the Southern Baptist Theological Seminary. He blogs at http://www.ShowntheWay.Wordpress.com.

Holidays (Other), Mailbag

The Mailbag: Mardi Gras, Ash Wednesday, and Lent

Michelle Lesley

For an expanded and more detailed treatment of this topic (based on this brief article), please listen to the Mardi Gras, Ash Wednesday, and Lent episode of A Word Fitly Spoken.

What are Mardi Gras, Ash Wednesday, and Lent? Are they biblical? Should Christians participate in them?

If you don’t live in Louisiana or a heavily Catholic area, maybe you’re not very familiar with these observances. Let’s take a look at each of them:

What is…

Lent– Lent is a forty day period (not counting Sundays) leading up to Easter. It is observed by Catholics and some Protestants. Historically, it is supposed to be a period of repentance, penance, fasting, and self-denial. The aspect of Lent that people tend to be most familiar with is the idea of giving something up (self-denial/penance) for Lent such as watching TV, chocolate, smoking, or eating meat.

What is the meaning of Lent? at Got Questions

What is Lent? at US Conference of Catholic Bishops*

Ash Wednesday– Ash Wednesday is the first day of Lent. Ashes are applied to the forehead in the shape of a cross to indicate repentance and that the recipient will begin the Lenten fast. Ash Wednesday is primarily observed by Catholics and some Protestants.

What is Ash Wednesday? at Got Questions

Ash Wednesday at Catholic Online*

Mardi Gras (Fat Tuesday)– Mardi Gras is the day before Ash Wednesday. It has its roots in Shrove Tuesday, which was originally a day of feasting on all of the foods that were forbidden during Lent so these foods would not spoil or go to waste since they could not be eaten again until after Easter. Through the years, this day of feasting has morphed into drunken revelry – sort of a “last hoorah” for getting all the sin out of your system before you have to start “being good” for Lent. In Louisiana (and a few other places), it is much more a cultural holiday than a religious observance. People from various religions as well as non-religious people participate in Mardi Gras. It is celebrated with numerous parades, balls, and other festivities. The colors of Mardi Gras are purple (representing justice), green (representing faith), and gold (representing power).

What is the origin of Fat Tuesday / Mardi Gras? at Got Questions

Mardi Gras History at Mardi Gras New Orleans*

Are these days/observances biblical?

Lent– Yes and no. Mostly no. The fundamental components of Lent – repentance, fasting, and the pursuit of holiness – are biblical. Repentance and holy living should be practiced by all Christians every day, and biblical fasting as the Holy Spirit convicts the individual Believer.

However, Lent is not mentioned or even hinted at in the Bible, and any Catholic observance (of Lent or anything else) is fundamentally unbiblical because the Catholic religion itself is unbiblical. It is also unbiblical for a church to require that its members observe a man-made religious ritual or to imply or teach that participating in this ritual earns favor with God or absolves or makes up for sin. Furthermore, to teach that there is a special time of the year set aside for repentance and holiness is unbiblical. Christians are to walk in holiness and repentance every day.

Ash Wednesday– Again, yes and no. Mostly no, and for most of the same reasons Lent is generally unbiblical. The fundamental components of Ash Wednesday – repentance of sin and the pursuit of holiness – are biblical and should be practiced by all Christians every day.

In addition to the unbiblical facets of Lent, Ash Wednesday’s forehead ashes “disfigure[s] their faces that their fasting may be seen by others” which is the exact opposite of the humble way Christ teaches us to fast.

Mardi Gras– No. The drunkenness, sin, and lasciviousness that go along with typical Mardi Gras celebrations are patently unbiblical as is the idea of getting all the sin out of our systems before we have to start being good. The Bible teaches against these things.

Should Christians participate in…

Lent– Catholic observances of Lent – no. Some doctrinally sound churches and individuals freely choose to set aside a time of biblical fasting, prayer, and worship in anticipation of Easter. For Christians who observe Lent in this way, as long as it is observed in keeping with Scriptural principles, it can be a valuable and meaningful time of respite and renewal with the Lord just as it could if observed at any other time of the year.

Ash Wednesday– No. It is unbiblical, as cited above.

Mardi Gras– Christians should not participate in any sinful activities any day of the year, including Mardi Gras, nor believe or portray to others by their actions, the unbiblical “theology” behind Mardi Gras. (And as a non-theological aside, violent crime in New Orleans during Mardi Gras has made attending Mardi Gras parades and other events very dangerous.)

However, as I mentioned, in Louisiana, Mardi Gras has become much more of a cultural holiday than an observance with religious undertones. Many smaller towns (and even some larger ones) eschew the debauchery that takes place in New Orleans and offer family-friendly parades which are basically as innocuous as our local Christmas parades or a Fourth of July fireworks show. For Christians who have worked and prayed through the appropriate biblical principles and whose consciences allow them to participate in non-sinful Mardi Gras activities such as attending these types of parades, I believe this is an issue of adiaphora (Christian liberty) similar to participating in non-sinful aspects of Halloween. (Don’t forget to take along some tracts to hand out!)

*These articles are linked for informational purposes only. Obviously, I’m not endorsing Catholic websites or anything on a secular website that’s ungodly.

If you have a question about: a Bible passage, an aspect of theology, a current issue in Christianity, or how to biblically handle a family, life, or church situation, comment below (I’ll hold all questions in queue {unpublished} for a future edition of The Mailbag) or send me an e-mail or private message. If your question is chosen for publication, your anonymity will be protected.

Holidays (Other), Mailbag

The Mailbag: Patriotism in Church

Michelle Lesley

Every year on the Sunday closest to the 4th of July, our worship service turns very patriotic. All of the hymns and worship songs are replaced with patriotic songs like God Bless America, America the Beautiful, and the National Anthem. The choir and whoever is singing a solo that day sings a patriotic song. A color guard marches in with the American flag and we say the Pledge of Allegiance. Sometimes the sermon is even on a patriotic topic. It makes me uncomfortable because I think the worship service should focus on God, not America. What do you think?

Independence Day is one of my favorite holidays. I love the fireworks and picnics, the bands, and watching my favorite musical, Yankee Doodle Dandy.

I’m as red, white, and blue, rah rah America as the next guy, but there’s a time and a place for all that, and the Sunday morning worship hour isn’t it. You’re correct. The worship service is exactly that: worship and service. And who are Christians supposed to worship and serve when we go to church? God.

We are to sing to, and about, God. The pastor is to preach the Word of God. We pledge our allegiance in prayer, worship, and confession to God. Our thoughts are to be focused on God. Every element of the worship service – songs, symbols, readings, offerings, prayer, praise, everything – is to draw our attention to God. He is the only One worthy of our worship.

Patriotic songs, the Pledge, and all of those other things can take the focus off God and put it on something lesser. Sometimes God gets pushed aside in favor of what we want to focus on. That’s a very man-centered attitude in the very place and time when everything is supposed to be centered on God.

And really, if you think about the main reason America was founded – freedom of worship – what better way is there to honor our forefathers and celebrate the gift of freedom God has given us than to exercise our First Amendment right to worship God? Certainly, we could use the 4th of July as a reminder to take some time in corporate prayer to express gratitude to God for our country and our liberties and to pray for our country. Scripture tells us to present our requests to God with thanksgiving. We could also dedicate some time to praying for our governmental officials as 1 Timothy 2:1-4 instructs us to do. There’s a biblical, worshipful way to be thankful for the freedoms God has blessed us with and intercede for our country and our governing authorities. And it shouldn’t be limited to one Sunday a year.

But when it comes to patriotic hoopla, we can set aside another time for that and still celebrate with our brothers and sisters in Christ. If your church family wants to celebrate America’s birthday together, that’s great! Have a church-wide cookout on the 4th. Schedule an Independence Day patriotic sing-along or choir pageant. Meet up and head out to the county fireworks show together. Fellowship! Have fun!

But when it’s time to worship, let’s make sure we’re reserving that time for worship of the King of Kings and Lord of Lords. It’s fine to love America, but let’s demonstrate that we love Christ more by not letting anything take His place in His church.

It’s fine to love America, but let’s demonstrate that we love Christ more by not letting anything take His place in His church.

photo source

If you have a question about: a Bible passage, an aspect of theology, a current issue in Christianity, or how to biblically handle a family, life, or church situation, comment below (I’ll hold all questions in queue {unpublished} for a future edition of The Mailbag) or send me an e-mail or private message. If your question is chosen for publication, your anonymity will be protected.