Mailbag

The Mailbag: Potpourri (Catholic book, Baptist church… Sharing Michelle’s blog with husband/church… Is posting “preaching”?… Husband wants to stay at unbiblical church)

Welcome to another “potpourri” edition of The Mailbag, where I give short(er) answers to several questions rather than a long answer to one question.

I like to take the opportunity in these potpourri editions to let new readers know about my comments/e-mail/messages policy. I’m not able to respond individually to most e-mails and messages, so here are some helpful hints for getting your questions answered more quickly. Remember, the search bar (at the very bottom of each page) can be a helpful tool!

Or maybe I answered your question already? Check out my article The Mailbag: Top 10 FAQs to see if your question has been answered and to get some helpful resources.


I have a question on a Carol Mader. Our church is a Baptist church and we are using a book called ‘kids travel guide to the fruit of the spirit”. When I check Carol out I find she’s Catholic? What are your thoughts?

I’m not familiar with Carol, but no Christian should be attending a church of any denomination where the pastor is OK with using Bible study, discipleship, etc. materials written by Catholics. Catholicism is not Christianity any more than Mormonism is.

The first thing I would encourage you to do is to make absolutely certain that Carol is, indeed, Catholic. I Googled her name, and several different Carol Maders popped up, including at least one who’s Catholic (also one who’s a retired Episcopal priest). The results also included the Amazon page selling books similar to the one you mentioned, by someone named Carol Mader. However, I was unable to verify that the Carol Mader who wrote those books is the same person as one of the Catholic Carol Maders.

But perhaps you have a more reliable source that unequivocally states that the Carol Mader who wrote the book is Catholic. In that case, I would encourage you to go to your pastor and kindly and gently ask him if he knows that this woman is Catholic. If he knows and doesn’t care, or tries to make you feel like you’re the bad guy for bringing this up, it’s time to find a new church. If he seems surprised and apologetic, immediately stops the use of the book, this was a one time goof on his part, and everything else about your church is doctrinally sound, forgive him and move on. Here are some resources that may help:

The Mailbag: How should I approach my church leaders about a false teacher they’re introducing?

Roman Catholicism: Mass Confusion at A Word Fitly Spoken


I am greatly appreciative of everything you have written [on your blog] and I wish I could read it all at once. There is so much good information. I desperately want to share this with my husband and church, but how can I do that as you are a woman, and then you would be teaching men? Thank you so much.

You’re very welcome. Thank you for your kind words. I’m glad my materials have been helpful, and it is my pleasure to serve you -and all of my readers- in Christ.

Let’s clear up a few things it sounds like you might be confused about or conflating, and I’ll share with you some resources that will give you fully-orbed answers to the several different questions implicit in your comment:

◇ Scripture’s prohibition against women instructing men in the Scriptures has a very specific context: in the gathering of the church body. There are many differences between the home and the church. They are two separate entities God has established in different ways for different purposes, and we need to keep them separate in our minds, especially when we study Scripture.

It might help to think about some of the obvious differences. Do you take up an offering or observe the ordinances of baptism and the Lord’s Supper in your home? Do you submit to your pastor in the same way you submit to your husband? Do you make sure everyone in your church is fed three meals a day and do all their laundry for them? These things may sound silly, but they help to illustrate that the church and the home run differently and have different purposes. Having a private conversation with your husband at home about something biblical you’ve learned (which is fine, biblically) is not the same thing as preaching it to your church from the pulpit (which is not).

Rock Your Role: Jill in the Pulpit

Rock Your Role FAQs

◇ Whether you verbally explain what you’ve learned to your husband, hand him one of my articles to read, or a random man stumbles across my blog and reads it, I am not violating Scripture’s prohibition against teaching men (and neither are you).

Are Female Bloggers Violating Scripture by “Teaching” Men?

◇ As far as sharing with your church or others, there’s certainly no problem with sharing my articles on social media, emailing them to a friend, etc. There’s also no reason you can’t share them with other women at church. However, if you’re going to be sharing them with more than a few other women, or reading one of my articles in a women’s class you teach, etc., run it by your pastor first, as a courtesy. He not only deserves to know what’s going on in his flock, he’s also responsible to God for what’s being taught in His church.

Rock Your Role Series

I answered this same basic question (with a few slight differences) to another reader a few years ago here (second question) in case it’s of interest.

I have been posting Scripture on my Facebook page every morning for the last six months. My friends are both male and female. Sometimes to make a verse more understandable I will explain who is speaking or who is being addressed. I’m starting to feel uncomfortable when I do this because I’m afraid I’m preaching. I check my study Bible before including clarifications to make sure I’m not misleading anyone. My gut is telling me I need to just state the verse. I pray about it and am wondering if it’s the Spirit convicting me. Thank you for your help.

It’s very important that Christians listen to our consciences so we don’t sin against them. If your conscience bothers you about posting the explanations, by all means, don’t do it. For you to do so would mean that you believe posting the explanations is sin, but you’re going to do it anyway. Don’t do that.

But while it’s important that we not sin against our consciences, it’s equally important that our consciences are informed by rightly handled, in context Scripture. And, in a nutshell, your conscience is a bit misinformed.

Though I wouldn’t suggest going to the extreme of habitually posting lengthy diatribes aimed specifically at men, railing at them about how they can be more godly men, pastors, husbands, or fathers, there’s nothing unbiblical about posting a verse with a few clarifying remarks to a general audience. Biblically, that is not preaching.

I would encourage you to prayerfully consider the materials I’ve provided the previous reader as well as this one Sisters Are Part of the Family of God, Too!. If, after reading, praying, and studying the pertinent Scriptures you still think it’s better not to post the explanations, that’s OK. Don’t. If your conscience is clear, and you decide it’s OK to post them, then you can do that. A few other options you might consider that your conscience may find acceptable:

  • Post enough of the surrounding verses to make the context clear so you don’t have to explain.
  • Use brackets. This is a perfectly acceptable grammatical device, especially in an informal setting like social media. For example: if the verse begins, “And he said to them…” and it’s clear from the surrounding context that it’s Jesus speaking to the disciples, then bracket that part of the verse with the antecedents replacing the pronouns for clarity: “And [Jesus] said to [the disciples]…”.
  • Use a direct quote from your study Bible or a reliable commentary instead of using your own words. Remember to use quotation marks, and cite your source.
  • When you post the verse, include a link to a (doctrinally sound) sermon, article, Bible study video / podcast, etc. that explains the verse and its context.


I have found myself in the situation of looking for another church because of women being allowing to preach occasionally in our current church, but my husband wants to remain. Should I come under his authority and remain also or do you think it’s ok to follow my own convictions? I feel somewhat conflicted.

I’m so sorry. I know that must be really difficult. Sadly, this is an issue wives face more often than you’d think. I hope these articles, though they may not match your situation exactly, will be of help to you.

The Mailbag: My husband wants to stay at an unbiblical church.

The Mailbag: A Lost Husband, a Saved Wife, and an Apostate Church


If you have a question about: a Bible passage, an aspect of theology, a current issue in Christianity, or how to biblically handle a family, life, or church situation, comment below (I’ll hold all questions in queue {unpublished} for a future edition of The Mailbag) or send me an e-mail or private message. If your question is chosen for publication, your anonymity will be protected.